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Mothering › Groups › December 2012 Due Date Club › Discussions › info/experience with Unassisted Birth--either planned or unplanned.

info/experience with Unassisted Birth--either planned or unplanned.

post #1 of 30
Thread Starter 

I have had a few friends have UC successfully and have such wonderful things to say about it--the accidentals were usually with the first borns and the planned ones typically with the 2nd or 3rds.

I had a prolonged labor with my DD almost 3 years ago and much of it was due to not being comfortable with my birthing environment and attendants {I know this in hindsight}. I was hoping that a HB would change that-I labored between home and a Birth center during 60 hours of labor, but ultimately transferred to a hospital and had a vaginal delivery there after another 10 hours. I made the best out of a very sub par situation. I knew immediately that I would HB for all subsequent babes, but the MWs that are available are really not anyone who I am interested in. The one who I had thought I would be going with has become completely not an option since she is having serious personal issues that will likely preclude her from attending births soon. So.....I am not really interested in hiring another MW that I'm settling for, like the first time, which has led me to think about UC in a rather serious way. I knew I was interested in it, but thought I would wait until after I had had a normal, HB with a MW and be ready for it for babe #3. Hubs is completely supportive of all of my choices surrounding birthing, but I was just wondering if anyone out there had an UC.....either planned or unplanned.

If planned....when/how did you KNOW that it was the right thing for you? How did you prepare yourself during labor to trust yourself and build your relationship with your body and baby in this vein?

DIslcaimer***--Please no dissenters here. UC is obviously not 'for' everyone, but I am not asking for any opinions about safety, nor do I want to hear horror stories. I am only really interested in REAL experiences and good info {links, books, articles--etc}.

Thanks, mamas!

post #2 of 30

I don't have any experience...but we've considered it as well!  Its still something I would like to do if the midwife we've had previously is not available. 

 

I'm interested to read some replies!
 

post #3 of 30
Hi! Just wanted to say that I had my planned UC back in october (2011). It was fantastic! At first when I read of UC I thought it was crazy yet admired it. I didnt want to admit to myself that I wanted to until i could no longer stay in denial, it was the only way I envisioned my daughters birth.

I researched a LOT, read tons of stories and articles, read books on midwifery... And read through the entire forum on unassisted childbirth here on mothering. Learning from other mothers' experience is extremly valuable. I suggest doing this even with having a midwife. I love UC but live midwifery too!

That being said having a midwife at your birth WILL effect labor either in a good way or bad way. This goes for any and all people who are attending. I did not want my lovely Mil there when i gave birth. I love her but i wanted support, not someone saying i know i know it hurts!! I felt guilty bu let me tell you I Am So HAppY no one was there because after having gone through it My hubby was the only one who could have and DID help me.

I guess when making the descison say to yourself, is this something I want? And if the answer is yes then go for it! Start preparing! Let rationality and not fear help you. And my last peice of advice is whoever will be there when you give birth (like your DH) make sure he is also awre of the facts of birth (breech is normal, wrapped umbilical is ok, you dont have to use alcohol on umbilical stump etc) this way you are both on the same page and there is no added stress.
post #4 of 30
My last birth was a planned UP/UC. It was amazing. I've had a hospital birth, two hb's with a midwife, and a UC. Planning a UC for this one as well. I knew right when I got pregnant with number 4 that I wanted a UC. Part of my decision was because we paid almost $7000 in cash for the previous two births. I felt like we were just paying that much to go to the midwife's house to chat for an hour and to step on their scale. I denied getting blood tests and checking my urine. While the midwives were great, I just knew I could do all that on my own. My labors are very short and I handle labor far better when I'm alone.

I did tons of research, read stories etc. A great resource is Laura Shanley's UC site. There is a great yahoo group on there also. A book I highly recommend is called Heart and Hands and like the pp said, have your DH aware of the facts of birth, that's really important.
post #5 of 30

I had one unplanned unassisted birth with my first. It was extremely fast in the back seat of a car! The baby was perfectly healthy, but unfortunately I hemorrhaged and needed to get pitocin at the hospital. (I also had hemorrhaging with my second baby who was born at home; having a midwife allowed me to avoid going to a hospital.) I am thinking about having an unassisted homebirth for my third, since I wasn't thrilled with my homebirth midwife practice last time around and I'd have to pay out of pocket, but the hemorrhaging worries me.

post #6 of 30
Thread Starter 

Thanks for sharing! These are my basic thoughts and feelings too right now. i always admired UC, but kinda didn't want to say, 'that's for me!' because I didn't want to admit it to myself. Now I am recognizing that it really is only ME that I trust {and babe} to birth as we are intended. 
My hubs is amazing. He stands in support of me 100% in all matters, birth and not. I am quite educated and am a licensed health care worker.--so, we do know basics of labor/birth/infant care--wouldn't use chemicals on brand new babes cord stump ; )
I would definitely want to take a neonatal resusitation class though--that would be something right off the top of my head that I NEED to feel comfortable! However, I am toying with the notion of a solo UC--just me--since we have a 33 month old DD, Hubs would be attending to her while I labored and then depending on circumstances, I would want them to come and be present for birth, but not labor.

post #7 of 30
Thread Starter 

I have heard {and had friends experience this} that eating a piece of your placenta immediately when hemorrhaging can stop it in its tracks.
Have you heard of this? 

post #8 of 30

mamaharrison-you are officially psychic, lol. I was *just* talking about UC with DH today and we are leaning towards it. We had done research on it during each pregnancy, but I think we are both FINALLY ready to do it.On a lighter note, DH came up to me a few hours after the initial conversation and says: "There are tons of UC videos on youtube. you know what that means right?" I was puzzled so he goes "We can definitely do UC-I watched what those guys were doing and I'd be waaaay cooler" LMBO!

post #9 of 30
Yes i have read/heard of women who have done this. Eating a chunk and then puttig a chunk right against your cheek on the inside. Also there are herbs i stocked up that would help with it, should that problem arise. One of the women in the UC forum said the placenta being eaten can stop the hemoraghing in fibe minutes or less.
post #10 of 30
Thread Starter 

 

Quote:
Originally Posted by eknuckles View Post

Yes i have read/heard of women who have done this. Eating a chunk and then puttig a chunk right against your cheek on the inside. Also there are herbs i stocked up that would help with it, should that problem arise. One of the women in the UC forum said the placenta being eaten can stop the hemoraghing in fibe minutes or less.

 

yes, this is the same info I have heard. I did have a friend who felt like she was bleeding excessively after her 4th birth and immediately did both of these things--ate a piece and placed a chunk in her cheek--and did not end up hemorrhaging, but since she isn't sure if she really was in the first place {she had a MW there, but it still wasn't a known at the moment becuase she acted VERY fast} she doesn't KNOW, kwim? haha. It all boils down to what you are comfortable with though--I personally am comfortable with this, but I also do't have a history of hemorrhaging.

 

post #11 of 30

I had an accidental UC with the last kiddo.  It was wonderful, though accidental and the mw was on the phone in the background LOL.  It was funny, at first she didn't believe me when DH told her that I said the baby was coming now! LOL.  Trust the birthing mom!  I'll say though, it was so quick.  Only a few painful contractions.  Had the baby (DH caught) and walked to the bed and just lounged around until the mw got there 20 minutes later or so.  The thing that was so incredible that I remembered was how I was so steady.  I remember after my other homebirths kind of being wobbily a bit afterwards.  Somehow instincts really took over when I was birthing on my own.

post #12 of 30

I had an unplanned unassisted birth with my second. It was awesome. I had a lot of chiro done because my first I was dialted to ten for five hours before descent. Weird.

 

So, although it was awesome and the hypnobabbies really helped me be calm, I wouldn't do it again by choice. I was lucky, and it was amazing, and I am grateful. But I respect the experience of midwife way too much to give birth UC by choice. I never realized it was so close because I was only two hours into labor and my labors are super intense with broken water and posterior babes.

 

We are planning a homebirth with a very experienced homebirth midwife. If I have exactly the same experience, with a midwife hovering int eh background, I'll be thrilled.

post #13 of 30
Thread Starter 

SO, where is the UC forum here on mothering--I see the 'lounge' for UC, but I have emailed for permission to join almost a week ago and no response, so, I'm wondering if it is active anymore. I'm anxious {in a great way} to start exploring this. Anyone link me to an active mothering forum??

post #14 of 30

Yep wave.gifme too. We had an unplanned UC  birth with our 3rd. Our Midwife (NOT our first choice) did not believe he was coming so soon so she stopped on the way to do a post-partum appointment.irked.gif

 

It was a beautiful birth, our first water birth no less! The cord was wrapped once, DH unwrapped after baby's head was out then out he came. Midwife got there 20 min later and freaked that I was in the tub!! Couldn't believe that I didn't go to the hospital when she didn't make it in time. Grrr... We told her everything was fine and we'll get out when we're ready.

 

I will say as long as you have the right midwife/doula/assistant, someone that will add positive things to your birth (and not freak out and tell you to call 911) It's nice to have that back-up 'just in case'. Especially since we're so out in the sticks and 30min away from the hospital.

 

Our midwife (not the one in the story)  had been a nurse midwife for 15+ years before getting certified. I was one of her first babes that she delivered when she was in her twenties and now she's still around helping me deliver mine! love.gif  She lets us do all the work and has such a peaceful atmosphere about her, you just 'calm' whenever she's near. She sits on the bathroom counter and knits during my births ROTFLMAO.gif. Just her being there is a true peace of mind. I wouldn't have it any other way.

 

If I didn't have her I'd definitely go UC, just so I don't end up with phone conversation "Call 911! Turn on your side!  Don't push until I get there!!" again.

 

Only you will know what's right for you and what you're comfortable with. Good luck! thumb.gif

post #15 of 30
Thread Starter 

 

Quote:
Originally Posted by Katri'smama View Post

 

 

I will say as long as you have the right midwife/doula/assistant, someone that will add positive things to your birth (and not freak out and tell you to call 911) It's nice to have that back-up 'just in case'. Especially since we're so out in the sticks and 30min away from the hospital.

 

 

I'm not in the sticks ; ) I live in a metropolitan city and am less than  miles from many L&D hospitals ; ) You must have borrowed that info from somewhee else ; )

post #16 of 30

I've had one intervention laden hospital birth, one fairly typical lovely homebirth, and and one unplanned UC.

 

They were each empowering in their own way and I don't regret past choices.  My horrid hospital birth gave me the wherewithal to follow my instincts that told me homebirth was the way for me.

 

My first homebirth was beautiful and healing (after the hospital before, and as I was at my parents after leaving my husband and in the middle of a divorce.  It was truly amazing and empowering. I had a tribe of people I loved around even though I didn't have a partner, and my midwife and her assistant were both very loved by that point.

 

Then 3rd kiddo, same midwife, a few years later.  New house (same bed, funny enough), new fantastic partner.  I had chiro the whole time, and I always really enjoyed the midwife connection through my pregnancy.  By this time I was drawn to UC, and not really fearing it so much, as just liking the prenatal sisterly connection.  I liked having that person who I could call or text at any time with weird thoughts or wonderings, or for a quick answer about herbs, etc.

 

she came out on wednesday (I had lovely prodromal labor with all of the kids.  days of soft labor) She told me to try to keep resting and let it happen when it happens.  I agreed I didnt want to force it with breaking water or anything since I was doing fine. 

 

Sunday am water broke at 805.  We did call here, and my mom (older kids were spending the night there) to let them know.  I had him birthed moments after my mom and kids got their so they got to see. But it was just J and I doing the work. <3  Ann and the chiro (her assistant at the time) got there too late, but just in time to clean up for me, bwahaha.  It was exactly what I would have wanted if I could have planned it like that!

 

4 preg we did hire her with the understanding that I didn't want as many appointments, and that there was a good chance she wouldn't get there in time again.  We lost that baby at 14 weeks, and she was a great comfort to me during that time.

 

This time around I've called her again, I do want to check heartbeat early, etc for my own peace of mind.  I think well still call her when I go into active labor, but I am fine with telling her to wait out in the living room if she does make it there before this one is born.  I don't feel strongly about UC enough to not have a support person that I've had a great experience with.  But I am soooo ok with speaking my needs up by this point so if I feel the need for it to be just my hub and I I can do that.

Course, I don't think I could tell my mama she can't be there, but she's been there for every birth and we are close and she's respectful and doesn't bother me in labor.

 

Chances are this one will be born 15 minutes after water breaks, if my pattern holds. lol

post #17 of 30

 

Quote:
Originally Posted by Millie Ivy View Post

This time around I've called her again, I do want to check heartbeat early, etc for my own peace of mind.  I think well still call her when I go into active labor, but I am fine with telling her to wait out in the living room if she does make it there before this one is born.  I don't feel strongly about UC enough to not have a support person that I've had a great experience with.  But I am soooo ok with speaking my needs up by this point so if I feel the need for it to be just my hub and I I can do that.

 

 

This is exactly how I am feeling! I am not sure that I am 100% comfortable with having no support person there but I have told them I really prefer laboring alone with DH . In my perfect plan the MW would come shortly before pushing starts and would wait in the living room in case I need them. winky.gif

 

But then again, if my labor goes any faster than the last one then I will most likely end up unassisted anyway!

post #18 of 30

Ditto, Tropicana.  I feel the same way!  Although, I'm really ok with her getting there after I'm even into the pushing stage.  Knowing someone is near or waiting in the wings if I need them is something I do like. 

 

But that's no judgement on true 100% UCers.  I think it's a fine choice for those that make it.
 

post #19 of 30

 

Quote:
Originally Posted by mamaharrison View Post

SO, where is the UC forum here on mothering--I see the 'lounge' for UC, but I have emailed for permission to join almost a week ago and no response, so, I'm wondering if it is active anymore. I'm anxious {in a great way} to start exploring this. Anyone link me to an active mothering forum??

 

Did you ever hear back? I e-mailed too and I haven't heard back as well.

post #20 of 30

 

Quote:
Originally Posted by revolting View Post

 

 

Did you ever hear back? I e-mailed too and I haven't heard back as well.

 

I e-mailed too and have yet to hear back..

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