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11 month old hates the car, still..

post #1 of 17
Thread Starter 

Anyone ever been in this situation?  My baby will be a year next week and still screams and cries in the car about 90% of the time.  When she was younger I kept thinking it would get better, but it's not.  She is now starting to arch her back resisting the car seat, doing these incredible acrobatics to avoid me setting her in it.  It's crazy.  Then, she screams and screams.  I can't always take my time to nurse her, soothe her, etc because I have older kids that need to be picked up, dropped off places.  Oh, also she just got her new convertible car seat today (an Evenflo Triumph) I hope the bigger seat will help!  It's really limited me to wanting to go places :(

post #2 of 17
Our LO was like that. We ended up letting her watch videos on the iPhone whenever she was in the carseat. She had no other TV time so it was a novelty for her and solved the problem 99% of the time. One of us would also sit in the back with her whenever we were all going somewhere together.
post #3 of 17

None of mine have loved the car. DD1 was 18 months before she didn't cry anymore. I like DS2 is following down that path as well. He will be 9 months old next week and still cries every time. 

post #4 of 17

I still remember how my 10yr old hated the car. I would dread any car journey. When he forward faced things improved heaps. Good Luck!

 

post #5 of 17

I was in the same boat. Absolutely hated the seat from day 1 and it also severely limited my going out.  This was my 3rd child and the others weren't like this.  When we did have to go out, it was a disaster - either he'd be screaming and choking or we'd be pulled over consoling.  Even a 2 minute trip was a ridiculous mess.  And that's with the other kids in the back trying to entertain him.

I mentioned it to our attachment-parenting friendly pediatrician and he said to just turn him around.  Said it's safer for all of us if mom isn't distracted by the crying.  This was 2 weeks ago, at 9.5 months.  It has been sooooo much better.  He fusses only 10% of the time now instead of 90%.  Should have done it sooner.  Good luck to you

post #6 of 17

My oldest screamed bloody murder whenever he went in the car for the first 12 months of his life.  The day of his first birthday, I switched him for forward facing, and he stopped, never cried in the car since.

post #7 of 17
Quote:
Originally Posted by Kokopelli-mana View Post

I was in the same boat. Absolutely hated the seat from day 1 and it also severely limited my going out.  This was my 3rd child and the others weren't like this.  When we did have to go out, it was a disaster - either he'd be screaming and choking or we'd be pulled over consoling.  Even a 2 minute trip was a ridiculous mess.  And that's with the other kids in the back trying to entertain him.

I mentioned it to our attachment-parenting friendly pediatrician and he said to just turn him around.  Said it's safer for all of us if mom isn't distracted by the crying.  This was 2 weeks ago, at 9.5 months.  It has been sooooo much better.  He fusses only 10% of the time now instead of 90%.  Should have done it sooner.  Good luck to you

 

Each parent makes their own choices, but I cannot let this go without saying something.  Rear-facing is VITAL at that age.  The AAP currently recommends rear-facing for a minimum of two years and then to the limits of the car-seat.  A nine month old is unsafe forward facing.  Hearing your child cry is heartbreaking, but I really encourage others to look for a safe solution to this problem!  Pediatricians are notoriously under-informed about carseat safety, so the fact that your pediatrician recommends this does not cancel out physics!

post #8 of 17
Quote:
Originally Posted by TiredX2 View Post

 

Each parent makes their own choices, but I cannot let this go without saying something.  Rear-facing is VITAL at that age.  The AAP currently recommends rear-facing for a minimum of two years and then to the limits of the car-seat.  A nine month old is unsafe forward facing.  Hearing your child cry is heartbreaking, but I really encourage others to look for a safe solution to this problem!  Pediatricians are notoriously under-informed about carseat safety, so the fact that your pediatrician recommends this does not cancel out physics!

Totally agree! Watch this video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=di0dSVJm-Rc&feature=share

post #9 of 17

Also wanted to add that we moved my ds1 to a convertible Britax at 9 months (we still did rear facing) and it made a HUGE difference because he could look around more.

post #10 of 17

I had the same problem with my daughter.  It was awful.  Once we turned her forward-facing, it made all the difference in the world.  We got a new convertible seat when she was 12 months and installed it rear-facing for a few months.  It helped a bit, but when she was 14 months, we finally turned her forward-facing.  She was so much happier.  I think she inherited my husband's motion sickness.  He cannot sit rear-facing on trains because he gets ill.  Good luck on finding a solution.  Just know that this too shall pass!   

 

When my dd was a baby, the recommendation was rear-facing for at least a year.  It's good to know that the recommendations are now for two years.  Fingers crossed that my new little guy can handle two years of rear-facing car rides!!!  thumb.gif
 

post #11 of 17

Forward facing was the key for my son as well.  I hated spinning his seat around at 1 year because he was such a little boy but I was suddenly a much safer driver.  I figure my very, very distracted driving with him rear facing balanced out with being able to focus on the road with him front facing.

 

DS is also Deaf so he not only couldn't see me when rear facing, he also couldn't hear us so for him, car rides really meant he was completely alone in the world.

 

I'm pregnant with #2 now and I'm hoping that having another child in the back will help this little one out.

post #12 of 17
Quote:
Originally Posted by Kokopelli-mana View Post

I was in the same boat. Absolutely hated the seat from day 1 and it also severely limited my going out.  This was my 3rd child and the others weren't like this.  When we did have to go out, it was a disaster - either he'd be screaming and choking or we'd be pulled over consoling.  Even a 2 minute trip was a ridiculous mess.  And that's with the other kids in the back trying to entertain him.

I mentioned it to our attachment-parenting friendly pediatrician and he said to just turn him around.  Said it's safer for all of us if mom isn't distracted by the crying.  This was 2 weeks ago, at 9.5 months.  It has been sooooo much better.  He fusses only 10% of the time now instead of 90%.  Should have done it sooner.  Good luck to you

No no no no.  Not safe at all!!!! Sorry, don't want to be super judgy, but we have a car seat screamer too and it SUCKS.  But if you are in any type of collision your child could die. For real. Babies that young do not have the neck strength to withstand a crash and could suffer an internal decapitation.  Please please don't forward face your 9 month old!

 

Wanted to add that for us, we are still rear facing our 26 month old even though she HATES the car. Getting a convertible seat helped a lot.  Having a certain CD with kids songs helps loads, giving her food and bribing her works too (I hate the idea of bribing my child, but we were desperate, we give her dehydrated fruit snacks!), and minimizing the trips we take with her is the only other thing we do.  I know it will pass some day, perhaps when she goes forward facing (which won't happen until she hits the weight limit on the carseat), perhaps it will be something else.  It is very difficult, but it will pass. 

post #13 of 17
Quote:
Originally Posted by wendizbaby View Post

Also wanted to add that we moved my ds1 to a convertible Britax at 9 months (we still did rear facing) and it made a HUGE difference because he could look around more.

 

I was wondering if a convertible car seat would help with my DD's car seat hatred. Maybe since they're not sitting so scrunched up? Or they can look around more? I think she hates feeling confined...

 

You think one of those mirrors that attach to the back seat's headrest would help? The ones that aim at the rear view mirror so your child and you can see each other.

post #14 of 17
Quote:
Originally Posted by wendizbaby View Post

Also wanted to add that we moved my ds1 to a convertible Britax at 9 months (we still did rear facing) and it made a HUGE difference because he could look around more.

Just did this with our 6mo and he's so much happier now!
post #15 of 17

Sorry no advice, but we are in the same boat and only walk or take the bus or train...My lo is ten months old.

post #16 of 17

Our baby started out liking the car but has now decided he hates the car seat. I read about this somewhere else but we started singing a song when we go to put him in the car seat. It's supposed to be a safety song about seatbelts but I just sing "Wheels on the bus." Most of the time he's so distracted by my singing that he forgets to protest being buckled in. If I'm late on the song though, there's no going back. The song doesn't interrupt a meltdown, just prevents one. We also have a special car toy, his favorite toy, a big Whoozit. And on long trips I sit in the back with him while Hubby drives. We've found that we can't stay out past 8 or the meltdown is unpreventable. Also when he gets hungry on trips, I don't take him out of the car seat. We stop somewhere private and I nurse him over the car seat. It's very awkward, but better than wrestling him back into the straps.

post #17 of 17
Quote:
Originally Posted by Kaydove View Post

I was wondering if a convertible car seat would help with my DD's car seat hatred. Maybe since they're not sitting so scrunched up? Or they can look around more? I think she hates feeling confined...

You think one of those mirrors that attach to the back seat's headrest would help? The ones that aim at the rear view mirror so your child and you can see each other.

I had a car screamer. Nothing helped. The screaming stopped about 10 minutes after I put him Ina Britax roundabout.
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