I don't mean to offend any of the dog lovers in this forum. I know nothing about dogs. I had a fear of since childhood. When Dd came along I learned to mask it - I did not want to pass on the fear to her. We have two cats and a fish tank, and Dd has fallen in love with a puppy. Since Dd has come along I've slowly been dealing with my fear, and the dog she is asking for is one that even I can see is silly to be afraid of. It's a teeny tiny thing destined to remain pretty small, it's laughable that I might have any fear of it.
A separate, and more important problem is that I already feel overwhelmed by the animal care. We had two fish deaths for no known reason, and the cats are on restricted access to the full house because they have had litter box issues and I work at home; can't have any odor. The cats seem content enough with their arrangement but they do not have free run of the house, which I feel bad about. Because of this, Dd doesn't get as much time with them as she did before we realized they had troubles. They are now older and have had a long stretch of good behavior, and we're looking at trying increased access again, very gradually. The fish tank has been allowed to come into balance and we've been talking about how it's probably ready for fish again. Now, all of a sudden, the dog thing comes up.
Dh says dogs are "no work", especially since the dog Dd likes is a small one that apparently can be litter trained. If we get this dog, 90% of the work will be mine and that's giving me a knot in my stomach. I admit, I'm a 'cat person' (Dh's term) and not wild about dog behaviors, but I've said no to requests for more cats or a lizard. Dh really wants the dog too; for himself and because Dd is asking. But - he works long hours and I can't count on him to do much or any of the work. Dd is 10 and needs constant reminding to do her share of work on the cats; I'm sick of hearing myself nag. I don't ask her to help with the fish tank anymore because I'm sick of hearing myself nag. She's a responsible kid but I decided not to give her any more animal duties. Of course she says she would do more work on the dog - but she says that about the cats and - I end up nagging.
Dd is in love with a puppy that probably is not even available anymore...and if we find out that it is, there will be a lot of pressure on me to agree quickly when this would be a huge adjustment, and even though Dh denies it, a time investiment, I'm sure. And if the dog goes the same way as the cats or the fish, I'll be in sad shape. If the puppy is still available next week, I feel like getting it is inevitable, yet I feel unable to cope. Dd is in a high stress profession and does not have much of an ear for my feeling overwhelmed by animal care. Dd just wants the dog - she is an only child. Days before she first met the puppy, she started coming to terms with the fact that she and her once-best friend are growing apart. She was feeling a big hole with the realization, and she feels like this puppy would fill the gap. But this is not a new whim, she's been talking of a dog for the past year.
Thanks for reading - my lack of sense relates to the late hour and the many facets to my quandry. Any advice in any of the problem areas I mentioned would be appreciated.