Delaying solid food

[Tara Borin]

Hi all! 

I'm curious to know if any of you put off the introduction of solid foods. My boy is just over 7 months old, and I've started introducing solids in the last couple of weeks. I thought he was ready...watching us closely as we ate, reaching out for our plates etc, but when it comes to actually trying the food, I feel like he could take it or leave it. I think he's more interested in the spoon than what's on it! 

What about feeding him chunks of soft food? I'm wondering if he's interested, but would rather feed himself. It's kind of hard for a baby to feed themselves pureed food...but would chunks of cooked soft food be safe? What size should the food be cut down to? I guess I'm thinking about before Magic Baby Bullets and food processors and blenders. I imagine moms either chewed the food first, or just gave babe really soft pieces.

Thoughts? Experiences?

Thanks!

Tara

[ShyingViolet]

We're doing baby-led weaning. My DD is 10 months old, and it's been great! She was like your son, not real interested in food but liked to be included. She's just now starting to eat a little more.

www.babyledweaning.com has a great guide. Basically you just offer big chunks or chip-shaped pieces of soft food. Youtube has some awesome videos, too. Just search "baby-led weaning" 

Good luck! 

[mamazee]

I'm personally a big fan of waiting until 6 months to try solids, and then after that following their lead. One of mine was just shy of 12 months before she was interested, the other went right for it at 6 months.

[Tara Borin]

Great resource, thanks for pointing me to it!

[Gracecody]

Listening in! My son was very eager to try foods and had many of the signs of readiness by 6 mos so I tried some avocado...didn't go well. He had blood in his stools and tummy cramps, followed by days of diarrhea. So I'm waiting but it's tough as he wants everything I eat and drink!!. He's 7 mos tomorrow. I will probably wait til 7.5 mos or so and try again with sweet potato or something similar.

[MN BabyDust]

My daughter wasn't crazy about the spoon at first, but loved other stuff. She wanted chunks of stuff at 6 months. She wasn't able to grasp the food well enough and trasnfer it to mouth, but she would grab our hands to shovel it in when we helped her. She is starting to warm up to the spoon. She didn't really love the baby cereal we started her on, she wants real food. I let her have little cubes of wheat bread (between 1/4 and 1/2 inch maybe?) and cubes of cheese, steamed carrots, scrambled egg, plain yogurt with iron fortified cereal  and pureed fruit mixed in, pita and hummus, really anything. You'll just get a hang of what his chewing and swallowing is like, and he will quickly learn how to handle lots of different things. Those gums can grind up a lot, it doesn't have to be just pureed baby food.

[tanyato]

my 5 month old shows all those "ready" signs, but I am not interested in introducing his body to solid foods. What I've done the past few days is cut a big peice of bell pepper and let him gum it to death while we eat dinner. loves it. he gets the taste of it but never actually eats any since he hasn't got any teeth yet. he's constantly supervised while gnawing, but i highly doubt he'd choke since it's such a huge peice. why don't you try giving him large peices of softish veggies and fruit? bananas? avocado? steamed broccoli? i guess that's baby-led weaning :)

[MrsGregory]

I'm in the thick of solids, so here are some disjointed comments, which I hope are helpful, or at least amusing.

We waited until our she-tyrant was about 6 months old, although she'd been showing readiness signs for a few weeks.  Her appetite actually dropped off, she reached for our food repeatedly, she's been watching us eat forever. 

The first thing I ever offered her was a frozen greek yogurt bar.  She did not like it.  When it was really time to get her to try something on for size I boiled some peas super-soft and offered her those.  She has the pincer grip, but she can't yet bring the prize to her mouth, so we did put a pea near her mouth and if she opened up, we popped it in.  I mixed up offering bite-size super-soft veggies (like peas, carrots) with offering puree off a spoon (like applesauce) and we had good results as far as we had no choking, minimal gagging, no allergic or digestive reactions. 

But she wasn't eating much at all.  We're talking one pea a day.

Mama got bored of the "every 4 days introduce a new bland food" rules.  We have no history of any food allergy of any kind in our family.  (Actually, we're the family that can eat half-rotten food, or really questionable seafood, or really questionable Chinese, or say, a whole goldfish with no ill effects.  We are designed by evolution to never, ever starve to death, our lot.  It's an awesome ability to have.)  So one night I just handed her some sauteed summer squash which had olive oil and kosher salt on it.  She sucked it down.  So then I offered her some guacamole a few nights later.  The biggest hit yet.

Now, a month after the peas were introduced, she just eats a little bit of our vegetables or fruits.  This week I will be roasting and grinding her some chicken to try.  She also enjoys a nibble of Mama's frozen coconut bar... glare all you want. 

Edited to add/

A picture of her eating some peas. 

[Katie8681]

This should make you feel better!  I have been offering them since ds was 6 months. Now he's nearly 10 months and is STILL almost EBF. He is just not thrilled about solid foods and when I give him anything too "exciting" he has had allergic reactions or done lots of gagging. Yet he's a happy, chunky baby. The most successful things I've offered have been soft chunks of food that are easy for him to manage with his hands and get into his mouth, like steamed carrot sticks, or loading up a spoon with puree and letting him feed himself. Purees have not gone over too well. I think he likes chewing- maybe it feels good on his sore gums. Poor kid is teething up a storm!  

[Choose2Reuse]

My DD (8 months) has a lot of dietary sensitivities (via breastmilk) so after talking to the pediatrician we put off solid foods till she was about 7.5 months, and have been kind of lazy about it since then.  I tried her on some sweet potato (something I know she can handle in breastmilk) and she ate a little...but mostly was interested in playing with the spoon and feeling the mashed up food in her fingers.  A couple of days ago I tried some spinach and BOY was that a mistake.  A night of terrible crying and gas and it came through in the diaper, completely undigested. :(

So anyhow, she's 8 months old and still pretty much exclusively breastfed, and at this rate will be for quite a while.  Every few days I offer her some food; sometimes she eats a couple spoonfuls, sometimes she doesn't.  Whatever.  The pediatrician told me that "food is for fun till you're one" and that solids for babies are just to teach them to swallow, chew, get used to flavors, etc. which seems sensible to me.  So we're letting her go at her own pace, however glacial that may be.

As far as your son feeding himself...let him try with the spoon!  My DD won't eat anything off the spoon if I hold it, but she knows to stick the end of it in her mouth (I help her get it close, then she grabs it and shoves it in).  That's the only way she's gotten the couple spoonfuls of solids that she has.  It's kinda messy, but what part of solids isn't? :) 
 

[ShyingViolet]

Is it ok if I go on a little rant here? I've been so stressed about this lately.

Originally Posted by Choose2Reuse 

So anyhow, she's 8 months old and still pretty much exclusively breastfed, and at this rate will be for quite a while.  Every few days I offer her some food; sometimes she eats a couple spoonfuls, sometimes she doesn't.  Whatever.  The pediatrician told me that "food is for fun till you're one" and that solids for babies are just to teach them to swallow, chew, get used to flavors, etc. which seems sensible to me.  So we're letting her go at her own pace, however glacial that may be.

Tell my mother and grandmother that!!! I've been trying since DD was 3 months. We didn't start solids until a little after 7 months, when she could sit on her own. I got RICE CEREAL AND LOTS OF IT pounded into my head like if I didn't shove food in her mouth forcefully I was a bad, bad mommy.  I never gave her any rice cereal. I think it's nutritionally void and constipating. They acted like if I didn't start with rice, she'd be all kinds of allergic to everything and that there was a "natural order" to introducing solid foods. I said I agree that there's a "natural order" but that rice cereal doesn't have any place in it.

 Now at 10 months, she eats what the family eats. She only ever takes a few to several bites of things, but she chews just fine and is growing like a champ. Every time I visit "the grandmas" the FIRST thing (before "hello") is "What has she had to eat today, can I give her a snack?" They're at the door, food in hand. It's absolutely INFURIATING. My whole family has a propensity toward obesity, and my theory has always been that my grandma is a force feeder. When her kids were little, she was a "finish your plate" kind of mom. Then when I was at an age where I started to develop hips and breasts, she started feeding me like crazy. She would guilt me, tempt me, and punish me if I didn't eat "enough." She'd do this all while making "you have nice stocky legs" kinds of comments. Not that this was the whole reason, but I developed a very severe eating disorder. I've since developed a healthy relationship with food, but I don't don't DON'T want my DD to be influenced like that. 

Ugh. Ha, thanks for reading that if you got through it. I've been having some issues with my family lately. They're usually my support system, and I feel like they've turned the tables on me. Frustrating. I'm a SAHM, so it's not like they're watching her during the day and should have more input. They don't support me financially (or emotionally, for that matter) in any way. They just feel so entitled to the same amount if not more control over my daughter that I have. Like they don't trust me to be a good mom. /rant

[rtjunker]

My family doesn't understand my parenting choices. They don't understand that I've read about said choices, and am making informed decisions about how to raise my LO. It drives me crazy, too. My sister went out and bought a stroller. because I NEED one, so far it's been used once to walk around the block at her house. They think I'm crazy because I cloth diaper, babywear, co-sleep, and EBF. Luckily my LO is so delightful and happy and chubby, already showing them that we're doing well. I do fear the 6 month mark a bit, because I'm sure I'll get recommendations to feed her rice cereal, and complaints that she's not eating enough. I'm just getting to the point that I don't see a need to defend my decisions, if she ends up eating rice cereal or other baby foods every now and again, oh well. All that matters is my family loves her, it's become obvious to me that all their advice is really about that. They care, no matter how misinformed or idiotic I think they are, they really just care. I used to get annoyed, frustrated, and angry, still do, but I've been trying really hard to let go of that and focus on how wonderful it is that so many people love my little girl. I wish I didn't have to always feel like I'm reinventing motherhood, I wish my family respected my decisions more, I wish I grew up in a culture that isn't disgusted by breastfeeding and didn't believe you could spoil an infant by meeting their needs, but maybe the choices we continue to make will change people.
 

[ShyingViolet]

Letting go is so hard. I wish I could, too. I've been trying to relax, and I'm doing better about not snapping at them when they hurt my feelings. I just have this feeling like they're the ones with the problem, so why should I be the one to have to change? I know that's not healthy, but it's hard when I know I'm doing the right things for my baby and all I get is criticism. Sigh. It would help if we weren't so close, I suppose. It's a blessing and a curse. I love having them around, but the way they treat me really hurts. I'm a self-sufficient adult, and they treat me like a 14 year old still living at home who had a baby, god forbid. Especially my grandmother. She acts like it's her personal responsibility to "save" DD from my bad parenting. She did the same thing to my aunt (her DIL) when my cousin was born. They don't talk anymore. I don't want that to happen with us. It's just hard to be around someone who doesn't talk about anything but what I should/shouldn't be doing with her baby.

My mom is a huge pushover, so when I was little, she just did everything my grandma said even if she didn't agree. The only thing she was adamant about was BFing, but only because she was super poor and couldn't afford formula! My grandma also didn't live in the same town as we did when I was a baby, so that helped with the "schedule" she had built in from raising babies in the 50's. There are so many things that could have helped my mom with me (I was way high needs) but she was told not to do. I was made to CIO a lot, and I don't know if that's had any lasting effects on me. This is kind of OT, sorry.

[Shannie77]

We did baby-led-weaning with both my daughters.  With DD1 we started giving her soft chunks of food at 6 months.  Around 10 months she was really eating.  With DD2 I didn't start solids until she was 8 months and she also started really eating around 10 months.  There is lots of info on baby-led-weaning on the internet.  :)

Whenever I got advice that didn't jive with what I was doing... like to start weaning early, or CIO etc.  I would just say "this is what they recommend now... pass the bean dip".  That seemed to work.  

[MrsGregory]

ShyingViolet, hi there!  I am not as close to my family, but I do get plenty of advice.  When it comes from family, and when it flies right in the face of what you're doing, it's hard to hear.  Well... it's hard to hear and not "talk back".  I just realized something that helped me feel more peaceful about receiving unwanted advice, repeatedly - especially if it's what was done for you - and that is that your mother probably did x or y thinking that was the best thing for you, and is now advocating x or y and is probably a little worried that you think less of her parenting because you're not only not doing the same, but perhaps even suggesting that what she did was harmful in some way.

When my mother and I discuss her methods (and my mother was very, very crunchy) and I decline to follow her advice, and it's something that I need to say: "I'm not doing that", I always sandwich that information with a lot of empathy about how I know she did her very best with me, and how she must have felt, etcetera. 

When we discuss how my daughter (her grandaughter) is eating, it's a touchy discussion, to be sure, because I had some special concerns regarding being fed and eating as a child.  I felt like a genius when I realized that my mother, in the midst of giving me advice, was also wanting to hear that I recognized that she had done her best.  Hang in there! 
 

[ShyingViolet]

 MrsGregory :)  Your idea makes so much sense. I know my grandma especially is INCREDIBLY sensitive, so it's hard to say any version of "I'm not doing that" without mortally offending her. But, overall she was a great mother and a fantastic grandma. I tell my mom all the time how much I appreciate how she raised me, but maybe I don't let Grandma know how much she means to me. My mom was basically an attachment parent without knowing it, and she got a lot of flack from my grandma for it. We co-slept, and despite my grandma's protests I breastfed until 2. It's just hard to have that constant "you're doing it wrong" vibe washed over you. I'm normally so confident in my parenting choices that it makes me more sad than anything else.

Now that DS is here, Grandma is a little more preoccupied with him than what DD is eating. There's of course the issue of tandem nursing and she thinks I'll starve DS (even though he's growing fantastically). She's always had a marked preference for boys though. She treated my male cousin better than me and that's showing up with my kids now, too. Oy. Family. What can you do? 

[MrsGregory]

The "You're doing it wrong!" vibe does completely suck.  I concur.

My family prefers girls.  We should do a survey of families, and see if it winds up being about 50/50! 

Can you give Grandma his growth charts, and highlight his fantastic percentiles for her?  I figure that will work well right until he drops off, like so many breastfed babies do...  We're at that phase now.  I'm advised to feed her many fatty things.  Thankfully she's discovered her appetite again and is getting chunky once more.  I was afraid my family would show up with beef fat and start shoving it in her!

I prefer avocados, my own self.

[carriecook-sew]

My 2nd never wanted anything off a spoon once she tried table food. Really enjoyed bits of whatever we were all eating. I agree it's just practice up to a year. It'll be fun to watch them try things! (2mth old here, I always imagine he's bored of breastmilk lol but I'm sure he's not)

[rainface]

We've been doing baby led weaning since about 5 months...just offering her stuff to see what she does with it. I had to sort of ease my mom into not spooning stuff into her (she watches her while I'm at work) but we're doing pretty well with it. We just watch her like a hawk when she's eating. She's gagged a few times but nothing major. I'm sure she's gotten the equivalent of about 2 tablespoons of food actually in her in the last month (she's just over six months now). I've had a similar experience with my grandma...the baby led weaning stuff completely freaks her out. She's not pushy about it but she gets terrified Little is going to choke when we feed her that way in front of her so we try to avoid it to not panic her. (And my grandma breastfed all five of her kids when it was NOT the thing to do...).

[Choose2Reuse]

ShyingViolet, this is waaaay late but I just wanted to say that I'm sorry you have to deal with that!  That's awful.  My mom is luckily very crunchy but even she has repeatedly asked me why I don't just give DD formula instead of breastfeeding her (DD has lots of sensitivities to stuff in my diet) and it used to make me really mad...until I realized that she's just worried about me not getting to eat much, because of DD's restrictions.  I agree with MrsGregory--your family is probably just worried about you and the baby and thinking that what worked for them will work for you, too.  Hope you can hang in there and that they'll bother you less over time--otherwise you can always come rant online, hopefully it'll be cathartic! :)