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My amazing son is delayed - Page 2

post #21 of 42
Thread Starter 

That is amazing!

post #22 of 42

Is your son learning several languages at a time? If so it might really explain any "delays".

post #23 of 42
Thread Starter 
He is learning three languages. grandparents on one side speak Greek, on the other side speak Polish.. And of course English. he spends a lot of time with his grandparents and says words in al three languages. for example, when a cat walks by he would never say cat, he would say Gatto (Greek) instead of ball he says balla....

I think this may cause delay, but the speech therapist says he doesn't put puzzles pieces together with the precision he should, and that his drooling shows that his face muscles are delayed. Occasionally, he bangs his blocks together and he did so in speech therapy (he enjoys drumming and rhythm) and she said this is a delayed form of playing.

don't get me wrong, he plays "normally" builds with Lego, pushes car, kicks a soccer ball etc

any mom would cringe at watching her child be scrutinized at this level, and look for some online support.

So, the impression I get from the experts is that he is delayed in more than one area, which is sad and very hard to take.

the upside is that everyday, he can do something new, say something new.
post #24 of 42
Drooling shows his facial muscles are delayed? Is he getting his 2yo molars? That made my ds drool for months at that age - and he was speaking in full sentences.

And he's supposed to put puzzles together with precision? My ds loves puzzles, but it often takes him several tries to get a piece in the right way (unless he has done the same puzzle several time before) and he's almost 3.5 with absolutely no delays.

I would seek the opinion of someone else.
post #25 of 42
Thread Starter 

Yeah...I agree. He does drool A LOT! :)

 

I guess all a speech therapist can do is make assumptions compared to other kids and maybe his coordination is sloppier. He is still quite sloppy with a spoon and fork, although he tries like a champ. He tries to count, sing the alphabet, he can handle all the playground equipment on his own, although his real passion in the outdoors is running and exploring, no puddle shall not be jumped in

 

He is 24 months. this whole journey makes me really appreciate that in Scandinavia, children start school at age 7. I feel like my son's job right now IS to explore, laugh, build with blocks, give us hugs and kisses and sing an ever growing roster of songs.

post #26 of 42

Drooling with a speech delay can be a red flag for apraxia so that is where the SLP is coming from, but it sounds like it was handled not that tactfully! You are doing the right things, he is on a wait list for a qualified person. Speech therapy can be flexible but not all therapists are. We've even done outdoor speech therapy because DS1 was not about to sit in a room! 

post #27 of 42

Honestly, I think you need a new SLP. As a mom, I think you are doing great and it is wonderful that you are trying to seek help for your child. As an SLP myself, I think what she is trying to say is that your son has some red flags that may be quirky, yet normal, toddler development or a sign of something more complex. The only way to figure out what is truly going on is to go for further testing in all areas of development.

 

However, I am not really sure if current therapist has your son’s best interests at heart. Calling him by another name, making up symptoms, refusing to inform you of how multi-lingual children learn to speak, and not adapting the session so that it holds your DS’s interests would make me want second opinion, which you are getting in a few months. Remember, you know your child best. Trust your instincts, Mama. 

post #28 of 42

Hi, sorry if someone all ready said this (I didn't have time to read everyone's posts) but when children are growing up learning more than one language they often, if not always, speak late. It is totally normal, judging from that I don't think your son is even behind at all. It sound like he is right on track for someone learning 3 languages at once!
 

post #29 of 42
Oh, I don't like your therapist!

According to him, my Son could be delayed too. He's a lousy puzzle player. He doesn't even put legos together. Not his thing, I think. But he is 26, speaking in sentences, so he is not under your therapist scrutiny.

While language delay is very common in completely typical children, it can also be a sign of some other developmental problem. I say I don't like your therapist because you should be able to trust one when looking for the best for your child.

I'd advise you to look for another professional. After all, this doubt is going to be haunting you anyways. It's a terrible place to be.

Best for you and your amazing son!

Forgive any typos, a foreigner writing without spell check is a hopeless thing to watch..
post #30 of 42

I've got to agree, that this therapist sends up red flags to me. I would personally find a new one.

 

My DS only regularly said 'Mom' and 'Dad', until a few months past his 2nd birthday. Then his speech blossomed, in one day, he said over 60 new words, and he keeps adding on more ever since. And how many toddlers dont enjoy banging blocks and such together? What?

 

My DH didnt start talking until he was 3, and he has a 171 IQ. And it IS normal for kids that grow up in multiple language households to have delayed speech. My DH grew up speaking English and Japanese.

 

Hang in there Mama, your DS is luck to have you, but take care of yourself too and dont worry too much.

post #31 of 42

I would say not to worry. At two, it is waaaaay too early to tell if your son is simply just developing at his own pace or if there might be some problem that needs tending to. From your descriptions, I would assume his problem is probably just wrestling with too many words, and variations of sounds, and not really being delayed at all.

 

At age two, I couldn't speak. Or well, I made sounds that my parents managed to decode somehow into one-two word messages. Such as "get shoe" "look kitty" etc. even if they came out all mixed up and strange. It didn't worry my physician, because she saw no signs of anything being wrong. My hearing, my understanding, attention etc. were all fine.

 

At age five, I could speak. But I stuttered and stammered. My physician was still not concerned, but my parents let themselves be worried by the special-aid teacher, who helped children with development delays in school, who suggested there might be something wrong since my speech was worse than some of the students she was helping.

 

Well, my parents booked a time with a child speech development specialist at the hospital. Just to be on the safe side. Her verdict?

 

I knew too many words. My stuttering and stammering was due not to a speech difficulty, as the teacher had assumed, but rather language proficiency. I knew an amazing number of words (and especially synonyms) for my age. My young brain was simply not up to the task of quickly finding the word I was after, and so I stuttered and stammered while it searched for the right word. She said that as my brain matured it would sort itself out, and it did. Today I have no problems whatsoever with talking. In fact, some people would wish I talked a bit less!

 

In any case, I just wanted to share my story since I think it is important to remember that "development difficulties" can sometimes be a sign of something good. It might be that your son is actually learning language faster than his young, still maturing brain can handle.

post #32 of 42
Thread Starter 

So, his vocabulary is growing every day. He is learning to do new things every day. He is getting better with a fork, he kicks his ball further all the time,climbs the stairs without holding on to a thing. He points at his favourite things in his favourite books and looks up at me to name them for him.

 

Today he went for his second last speech therapy session with his dad. His dad came home and said that he was clumsy putting the pegs into the holes and she recos a physiotherapist

 

So, now the team of experts is: Occupational Therapist, Physiotherapist, Speech Therapist and Developmental Pedicatrician.

 

I am totally comfortable with the Dev Pediatrician

 

I have to say, it could be PMS fueling this, but I AM FURIOUS. He is TWENTY FOUR MONTHS OLD!

 

I am fuming, emotional, bewildered....I just want to cry now.

 

I have to keep reminding myself that people are only looking out for him

 

He looks as big as a 3 or 4 year old.  But he is not developmentally where a 24 month old should be (I guess, but to me he seems normal)

post #33 of 42

ds2 didnt really start talking until after age 3.  he's perfectly normal, just a late talker
 

post #34 of 42
Quote:
Originally Posted by Tina Dun View Post

So, his vocabulary is growing every day. He is learning to do new things every day. He is getting better with a fork, he kicks his ball further all the time,climbs the stairs without holding on to a thing. He points at his favourite things in his favourite books and looks up at me to name them for him.

 

Today he went for his second last speech therapy session with his dad. His dad came home and said that he was clumsy putting the pegs into the holes and she recos a physiotherapist

 

So, now the team of experts is: Occupational Therapist, Physiotherapist, Speech Therapist and Developmental Pedicatrician.

 

I am totally comfortable with the Dev Pediatrician

 

I have to say, it could be PMS fueling this, but I AM FURIOUS. He is TWENTY FOUR MONTHS OLD!

 

I am fuming, emotional, bewildered....I just want to cry now.

 

I have to keep reminding myself that people are only looking out for him

 

He looks as big as a 3 or 4 year old.  But he is not developmentally where a 24 month old should be (I guess, but to me he seems normal)

 

It's strange, of course I haven't seen your child and am in no place to judge, but, aside from the speech issue, I haven't heard anything that sounds too different from my 25 month old.  She can't climb stairs unassisted yet, is very good at puzzles, but still definitely needs to twist the pieces around a bit before getting them in properly, is proficiently sloppy at eating with a spoon and fork... I would be completely bewildered if I was told she was delayed.  Have you considered...just not going through with some of the therapies yet?  Could you plan to give it all a few more months to play itself out and then reassess?  (Forgive me if you've already addressed that question elsewhere in the thread.)

post #35 of 42

Ok here's my story and I hope hearing it helps.  My oldest son who is now just about to turn 4 was a very late talker.  When he was two he had zero words...well he did say 'Mum' but it could mean anything from me to milk to 'I want that over there'.  So besides 'mum' he would go 'ehhh' and point to communicate.  That's it and it continued that way until he was just about 3 when he finally started to say some words.  Now he is just about to turn 4 and when I look at the video of him at his 3rd birthday it's so hard to believe how much his speech has improved in one year.  

 

My doctor was VERY concerned and had us take him to someone to get assessed when he was about 2 1/2 - he had his hearing tested and we met with a speech pathologist who said there was nothing wrong and that he was just taking his time to talk.  I finally chilled out when I discovered the book The Einstein Syndrom: Bright Children Who Talk Late by Thomas Sowell.  There is nothing I can say about the book that hasn't been said already by the reviews on Amazon.com so I won't go into it but you should definitely check it out - especially if there are scientists or engineers in your family.  

 

My son is still WAY further behind in speech than his peers but I don't worry, I know he will catch up.  We all just develop at different times and I think that 99% of the time there is no big problem associated with speech delay (except in kids who are having other signs of developmental delays).  Try not to worry or put pressure on him - it's extremely likely that sometime, when he is ready, you will be able to have a good conversation with him and find out what's been happening in his little head :)

 

Take care :)

post #36 of 42

A couple of thoughts...

1.  In my experience as a teacher working with kids with autism, echolalia rarely involves speech from another person in the child's life.  The "scripts" ( the things the child repeats) usually come from movies, cartoons, TV commercials, and so forth.  They hardly ever come from interactions with a caregiver.  

Thinking of a student I had a few years back who was the poster child for echolalia, he usually said things like:

Wascally wabbit (Elmer Fudd)

That's all folks (Looney Tunes)

"I'm cross" (Thomas)

(Goofy says Gawsh) (Disney)

Watch your step! (from some YouTube video he liked to watch)
 

Shhh, I'm hunting wabbits.  (Elmer Fudd)

These were things he'd say throughout the day and they were completely at random (no obvious contextual triggers), although the frequency appeared to increase when the student was stressed/agitated. 


2. Hand flapping, spinning, repetitive movements, stimming etc. are usually associated with the more severe/pervasive types of autism.  Kids with Asperger's for instance don't usually have these traits, or if they do, they're very minor compared to the kids with more pronounced autism.  You can't rule out autism spectrum disorders completely with the absence of these traits, but you can probably rule out the more severe types of autism.

3.  There many developmental delays besides Autism.  I don't know if I'd recommend driving yourself crazy researching them all.  If you're concerned about a true development delay (beyond delayed speech), you may want to see a developmental pediatrician (or whatever the Canadian equivalent is) and do a Global Developmental Screen or a non-verbal IQ test (note there's validity problems with a child this age) and rule some things out. 

Good luck figuring all of this out.  It sounds like at a minimum, the person you are currently working with is not a good match for your child, and you may want to see if there's another service provider you can work with.  Another thing to remember is that without clear cut symptoms of a major developmental disorder, it's hard to diagnose much of anything until a child is between 4-6.  Before that's you're stabbing around blindly in the dark.

 

post #37 of 42

2 of my nephews are the same way. One didn't talk more than grunting and a stray babble here and there until he was 3. His sister had started to talk at 1, in full sentences. He's fine at nearly 5. My other nephew is almost 2 and mostly just bringing things to people, pointing and grunting, but he's really doing well otherwise. My Mom said one of my brothers were the same way. He's now 30 and doing great. He has NO problem talking, it's the shutting up part that's difficult.... orngbiggrin.gif

post #38 of 42

He's in a multi-lingual environment? Often speech is delayed in multi-lingual kids, though its not usually a bad thing, they are just trying to figure out which words and grammatical rules to use with which language...be patient, if there is no significant change in the next 6-9 months, then reevaluate.

post #39 of 42
Thread Starter 

Thanks. I'm sorry, My post was very reactionary - I was really unhappy.

 

We have one more session with this speech pathologist and then we are done.

 

The good thing is - he is starting to talk, not just saying "banana" when he sees a banana etc (he can name a lot of things) but actually communicating his needs. Telling us he is hungry by walking up to his chair and saying "hungy" and telling us he is done with taking a bath, or asking us to read a book to him, all in simple terms of course. And I find he understands more. I say "Hey, wanna play puzzle?" and he goes right to the drawer where his puzzles are and grab one and bring it over. Same with "can I have a hug? Kiss? Want to go outside? Upstairs? Take a bath? Go to bed?" He understands and acts on all of it

 

I know I am being an overly reactionary mom. I know the Speech Therapist is doing her job. And its not her fault that he talks at home and not in the brief sessions with her.

 

I am really struggling with all of this because I believe he is okay, he is just growing and developing at his own pace. But then I see something, like if I say "Show me the carrot!" in his book and he doesn't do it, and I am full of doubts and fears...and then I am conflicted. Should I follow my gut? Or is "my gut" confused?

 

I know he doesn't understand as much as my cousin's 24 month old (who also doesn't speak, in fact, speaks even less than my son) but if you say to him, "Go get your milk, I am busy" He will go to the fridge, and grab his bottle of milk. My guy wouldn't do that. But I guess because he is learning every single day, I believe he WILL do all that kind of stuff. Maybe just a month or two later than his cousin.

 

Its so hard...as a mom to look at your son and see a sensitive, loving boy with a sense of humour and a zest for life - who is SO full of laughter, and believe "there is something wrong here, he needs to see a gang of specialists" But I think thats because I am his mom

post #40 of 42

Can you please contact me regarding your son's delayed speech?

 

My daughter is 3 now started like your son, they said the same thing about her, but i want to exchange with you all her progress.

You sound like me...and you explained your child like my daughter exactly.

I live in Canada as well...

email is patel.sarfaraz@ymail.com

 

Thanks,

Samy

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