I'm 38 weeks pregnant, with my due date on May 14th. I've had labor pains all week long and I'm expecting to go into labor anytime now... I'm unsure if it's the late pregnancy that's getting to me, or if it's my depression resurfacing...
But I can't help but be scared and worried. I'm so full of emotions and anxieties that I don't know what to do with myself... or where to place them. I have a five year old daughter, and this will be my second child. With my first born I was only 19 and a single mom. But now I'm married with a husband who loves my daughter dearly. This second child is an addition to our family, and upcoming the 28th will be our first year anniversary of being married... I ought to be happy and joyful. I completed my college semester with top greats, and have supportive friends who are eager for this birth...
But I feel like an emotional wreck even though all is great. I'm worried about being a mother to two children. I doubt myself as a mother and therefore having a second child is nerve wrecking. My own mother and I are not on good terms. I'm just recovering from an abusive relationship with her. I've been going to therapy and trying to heal and forgive... But it's hard. She wants back into my life after telling me she didn't want a daughter anymore. I'm tired of this woman coming in and out of my life when she pleases, treating me however it suits her. I'm trying to be strong, but I have so many insecurities because of this relationship I had with her.
Are these feelings of depression and anxieties towards the end of the pregnancy normal? Or am I slipping back into depression? Can anyone share similar feelings?
I'm just scared. I don't know what to do or think... and waiting like this with the slow labor pains is really pulling me down ontop of it all.



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