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Weekly Chat - May 21-27 - Page 3

post #41 of 60
Originally Posted by Yeeska View Post

Maybe I'm being paranoid, but I feel like my fundus hasn't moved in several weeks. I'm 25 weeks and I feel like it's still around belly button level. It's starting to worry me. I feel movement every day...

Can you tell how your baby is laying?  I'm 23+2, and this baby is persistently transverse. I don't think my fundus has moved a ton in the last couple of weeks, either, but now I can feel baby parts on my sides. No, that is not an exaggeration!  So it could be how baby is positioned too.



Originally Posted by Worldshakerz View Post

I think I'll be calling my midwife today, too. I got a note home from the kid's school that they were possibly exposed to 5th Disease - which usually is no problem at all for a pregnant woman to be exposed - especially if you had it as a child you will be immune and won't get it again. But I have no idea if I ever had it. I may have. But in the event that a pregnant woman gets it, it can cause complications - they are quite rare especially if it happens after midway through the pregnancy but it still freaked me out to read about it!

My kids were exposed during the first tri when it is most dangerous. My OB had me have titres drawn, and I was immune already. My mom *thought* I had had it, and she was right. So that is good news! I hope the same is true for you.



Weight gain--I have a true "starting weight" this time since I was at my PCP two days before my BFP. I am up 3lbs at 23w. BUT I lost nearly 10lbs in the first tri, so I have gained 13lbs in rapid fashion :)  I have gained anywhere from 27-50lbs with my three pregnancies, and I started at the same weight with the highest and lowest gains. I did feel a ton better when I only gained 27, so I'm trying to keep it to that this time.  Under 30 is my goal. I am just trying to make healthy choices, and the good thing is that I crave raw veggies. Better than the milkshake craving I had with one of the others ;)  I really think your body knows what it needs to do to be healthy.

post #42 of 60

weight -- Every body (not just everybody... but every *body*) gains different in pregnancy.  I tend to not gain much at all.  I do start out a bit fluffier in general, but nothing extreme, and usually come out *lighter* after baby is born.  It's just how my body works.  A previous DDC member (whom I remain great friends with) gained 75+ pounds with each of her pregnancies.  It was simply her normal.  She started out average, gained a lot, then lost it all after baby was born.  Some gain a lot, some gain very little... bodies just do different things :)


fundal height -- After reading Yeeska's post, I was laying on my bed (reading from my phone... I so rarely get computer time!) and felt mine.  I'll be 25 weeks tomorrow and I felt like mine was just at my belly button.  At my last midwife appointment, I was 22+ weeks, I think, and I actually measured at 26 weeks.  So... measuring ahead, even though my fundus appears to be not so high.  I feel tons and tons of movement (more visible from the outside now! So fun!!  Last night felt like this baby was doing sommersaults in my uterus! It was hilarious!  DH happened to be laying right by me so he got to feel it too!).  There are variations to normal within this as well.


beach talk -- Beach talk gets me jealous!  I live in super land-locked WY, so no beaches around here ;)  There are reservoirs and lakes around that have 'beaches' but nothing significant or that much fun... if we head to a lake, it's usually to go fishing with my grandma and my mom! ... Plus, right now it's just 41* outside with a wind chill of 34*.  Aaaaaand, it's raining.  Turns out, we're not doing a lot of outdoor adventures right now.  My house is getting kind of chilly since I turned down the heat (um, just last week it was 90*).. but there's no way I'm turning it back up.  I should bake or something?  I'm not much of a baker though... that's my mom's job! ;)


I ran across this article today http://www.wisewomantradition.com/healingwise/2012/05/calcium-heart-attacks.html ... Basically, it says women who take calcium supplements are at a WAY higher risk for heart attacks than those who don't.  This is of concern for me (and probably others here) since I do take Natural Calm (a calcium/magnesium supplement) at night.  So... now the question is: Is it worth it?  Does this apply?  Ugh.

post #43 of 60
Thread Starter 

Amen to all bodies and pregnancies being different! Weight, fundal height, all of it- I wish more pregnancy resources did a better job of emphasizing this.


Flower of Bliss, hope the IL visit goes well, as well as it can. Maybe you could come up with a list of projects you'd feel okay with them tackling in advance, as a way to mitigate their constant activity? I can definitely relate on the ILs-parenting-spouse thing.. Nobody really tries to parent me, but it's so weird (and disappointing?) how those roles can revert for him when we're around his family. Not in a spoiled way, but in a defer-to-elders kind of way, which still makes me feel like--when are you gonna think of yourself as a grown-up? It could be worse--at least he didn't go get the haircut his mom kept insisting on last visit--but it's still exasperating.


AFM- hubby felt movement for the first time this week. I keep wanting him to show more excitement. He was happy, but then it was over and onto the next thing. I'm pretty sure he's just gonna be the kind of dad that falls in love when the baby is actually here. I saw it play out that way with a close friend- he was surprisingly indifferent about his wife's pregnancy from what I saw, way more so than my husband is, but once he met his daughter- forget about it. I think in my situation I'd just like him to get it more, with a number of pregnancy-related things. He's been really helpful all the way through, takes off work for all our mw appointments, etc. etc., so it's not that he's not supportive.. just (obviously) has no real way of being able to relate to certain things. Oh well.


We were supposed to have a mw appointment today, but she texted early this morning to reschedule for next week. Apparently we're doing another blood draw? Not even sure for what. But now that the babe checks in with her fists and feet on a regular basis, I'm fine with waiting.

post #44 of 60

Sounds like lots of fun vacations are in the works over the next couple of weeks!


Regarding Grandparents: my father is the one driving me insane.  He has decided that he doesn't want to be around when our little girl is born.  He and my stepmother will be in their Colorado home, avoiding all the insanity, he said.  It doesn't make sense to me.  When I asked my mother about it, she urged me not to take it personally and explained that my father has never been really into little babies.  He loves playing with toddlers and small children, but at the end of the day, he doesn't know what to do with a baby.  He didn't make it to the delivery room when either my brother or myself were born, and wasn't around much because he was obsessed with his career.  Big surprise they're not married anymore, I know.  Complete opposite of DH, who couldn't be more excited about our baby girl.  She's still in my belly, but Mae has somehow managed to wrap her daddy around her little finger and become the apple of his eye.  I wish I could describe the look on his face when he thinks about her.  Mae and I are his moon and stars.  How could a father not feel this way?


The other thing my father has decided to do is get realtors looking at a house for us to move into.  Because DH and I can afford a bigger mortgage payment, my father thinks that means we should be in a bigger house closer to where we work.  I want to stay where we are - what if I decide not to go back to work?  If we have a bigger mortgage payment we don't have that option.  I have our daughter on the waiting list at one of the best daycare places in the state, another unaffordable option with higher bills.  All the houses we can afford in the part of town my father thinks we should move to within our price range need at least $50k in upgrades.  Who in their right mind moves into a fixer-upper while pregnant or with a newborn unless they absolutely have to?  I have explained again and again that we aren't interested but he persists.  Tonight DH and I have dinner with him, and DH is going to lay down the law. 


Between avoiding Mae's arrival and the house thing, I feel like my father thinks I'm a failure at life and doesn't care about me.  Last night I cried and yelled and stressed to DH about it.  The negativity is not good for any of us.


I think families act crazy when a baby is on the way.  One of my sister-in-laws is jealous and refuses to speak to me.  She has four children and is miserable.  I don't get it, but I've never really liked her anyway, so I don't really care.



On to other stuff, who has started birthing classes?  DH and I went to our first Bradley class on Wednesday night.  I'm already loving the exercises and relaxation work.  It's encouraging intimacy and proactive birth training between DH and I, which is soothing for us.  I love going to bed right after our meditation.  Last night DH guided me through our Bradley relaxation, then another relaxation exercise he used to do in theatre classes in college.  I fell right asleep after!


Regarding weight gain: I'm over too, but my doctor thinks I'm right on track.  All my vitals are normal, I'm working out just about every day, and I'm eating healthy.  Over the last two weeks, however, my weight gain has slowed down dramatically, so I wonder if I'm one of those early gainers they talk about.  It could be that I've increased the number of days a week I exercise.  The exercise makes a huge difference with the swelling and water weight!

post #45 of 60

I must say my DH is pretty hands on with the baby. Even while they are in utero he talks to them and kisses my belly, he pokes, strokes and tickles lol. Sometimes it's too much but he loves it. It's as close as he can get I guess. I HATE however when he pulls on my outie belly button. OMG...drives me bonkers.


Anywho...weather...brrr...that sounds cold where some of y'all live. While I don't like the high energy bills in the summer (past the 250 Dollar/mark), I really like all the opportunities of water activities we have. It does get tiring though. I didn't know you can get tired of sunshine LOL. People get so excited about rain here in the Houston area and post pics like crazy on Facebook about who has the bigger puddles in the backyard :).


Weight...hmmm...I have been gaining about 1lb a week I believe. I don't know what my starting weight was at my OBs. I think I'm up anywhere between 10 and 16lbs, not sure.


I registered for L&D on Monday after my appointment. Holy moly. They want you to be registered by week 24, early if you ask me but oh well. We made it a family trip. First we went to the OB, then DH and DS went to the pediatrician to get DS booster shots, while DD and I went to register for L&D as well as some super sibling classes for the kids that the hospital offers. The OB is kinda far away  so that I always try to schedule everything for the same day.

post #46 of 60

I'm jealous of those of you who can tell how your babies are lying. I am totally unable to tell what baby body parts I'm feeling. I can't even guess. I can feel movement near both of my hips and lots of movement down low. I am pretty sure my uterus is about 3-4 fingers above my navel. I'm 26 weeks now...  I'm going to have to ask my midwife for a lesson on how to tell. It drives me crazy!


At 26 weeks I've gained 11 lbs. I gained 18 lbs with my first and 8 lbs with my second. I'm guessing I'll gain 20ish this time? I hope it's not more. I have a bitch of a time losing weight.


I hope all of you Americans have a great long weekend!



post #47 of 60

Maman, I recommend checking out the http://spinningbabies.com/baby-positions/belly-mapping website- they have descriptions of ways to tell how the baby is oriented.


Placenta issue:  I just had my ultrasounds today, at 23 weeks, and s/he looks great!  So active it took a bit of time to get measurements.  The big down side is that my placenta is 2.5 cm from the birth canal (when my bladder was empty- the first measurement, with a full bladder, was 3 cm).  I know there's lots of time for my uterus to grow such that this isn't a problem, and so far, I've had no bleeding issues or any other signs or factors related to placenta previa.  However, regardless of what growing baby and I do, it means I have to have another ultrasound (that I don't want to pay for =P), and I may risk out of our planned home birth.  Now, I'm happy that I would learn that at 30 weeks- that is still far less stressful than a transfer during labor- but still a possible disappointment.  I am not a home-birth-at-any-cost fanatic- I'm really quite conservative.  I just have far more special memories of my second birth (a home water birth) than of my first (a hospital birth with midwives, no interventions).

post #48 of 60

Today I tried to take a power nap, but got distracted watching the baby move.  :D  awwwww  DH even came over and watched the show as well (he's not much of a 'hands on the belly' kinda guy -says something about Aliens? lol- )  Anyway, it was way cool!  


most of the movements are kinda side to side.  it moves a lot.  USUALLY i feel lots of movement REALLY low.  strange vibrations down low when baby gets the cervix.  LOL  I'm just hoping that the hands and not feet.  Not that i really have to worry this early in the game, but it would be nice if baby tends to orient down, you know?  


I can sorta palpate baby, i can tell where my uterus is soft and hard.  i show my son and he's learning too.  At least he's not poking now and using the pads of his fingers.  But, baby can still hide, i figure there is a super duper hiding spot really low.


oh, in other news: I bought a dress at goodwill.  Yes, a dress, holy cow, i usually reserve those for church or something.  But, with this baby so low, pants are super uncomfortable and i sometimes have to pull out the waistband.  So, i've been searching for a dress.  Found something that'll work for 5$  YAY!  Then I went to Joanns and bought 2 patterns for super cheap and now i just need to find fabric that'll work.  The only knit fabric at joann's that i liked was on sale for 10$/yard.  yeah, that would defeat the purpose of CHEAP/Affordable.  If I wanted to spend 30$ on a dress i'll only wear for a few months then i'll buy one.  If it was for a dress in my normal size then sure, not a bad price.  Now I'm fabric sufing on the web and found some likely canidates for 5$/yard.  the only drawback is that i'm pretty tactile when shopping for fabrics, can't exactly feel 'em up online.

post #49 of 60
Originally Posted by judybean View Post


I ran across this article today http://www.wisewomantradition.com/healingwise/2012/05/calcium-heart-attacks.html ... Basically, it says women who take calcium supplements are at a WAY higher risk for heart attacks than those who don't.  This is of concern for me (and probably others here) since I do take Natural Calm (a calcium/magnesium supplement) at night.  So... now the question is: Is it worth it?  Does this apply?  Ugh.

I ran across an  article  about this.a.few.months.ago.and.did.some.research.and.the.best.I.could.come.up.with.is.that.high.risk.for.heart.attack.was.only.in.those.just.starting.it.




post #50 of 60

LOL Juicy, I was wondering why the period after every word :).


@Katt: I'm back from a shopping spree just now. I have been feeling the itch to spend money on myself and even though I have more maternity clothes than ever I'm so over the ones I have (handmedowns). there's a pair of jean shorts that I have been wearing but I just can't stand it. It makes me feel like I'm Vada from "My girl" or something..you know the longer bermuda jeans weith weird fading in the front. Anyway, I got four pair of shorts at Motherhood (70 bucks..yikes) and two maternity tanks as well as a regular long dress at Target for about 40 bucks (yikes again) and that HAS TO BE IT now. I know the growthspurt is just starting but those tanks seem long enough to cover my belly for the next three months and the dress I can hopefully wear even after pregnancy. Shopping is no fun with kids but I gave them my Ipod and phone (hello 21st century) and promised icecream when they behave and so they did :). Bribery is my friend. They did great and even though getting in and out of the car 23 times is annoying, they sure didn't let me know.


We will be heading into the Hill Country some time next week, probably on Tuesday or Wednesday. Just a few days. DH starts at U of Houston early June so this is our only window to go since I will be way too pregnant for anything in August.

post #51 of 60

Yeah, I HAD a great selection of maternity clothes.  

Here's the story.

My sister had a bunch, she loaned them to me.  2 bags.  one bag was her's, the other bag belonged to her friend that would want them back.  No biggie.  I'll put her inital on the tags and call it good, yeah?

I get a text from my sister a few weeks ago: 'my friend is pg and wants her clothes back'  LOL  so, I now have them packed up and am returning them today.  I hope i got all of 'em.  oh well, if not, i'll get 'em to her.  She's about 3 months now, so i'm pretty sure she's not desperate, but there were some cute shirts in there that I liked!  


I had to go get some jeans at goodwill 'cause my sister's were just too big.  :(  oh well.


I'm glad you found some clothes that'll work for you.  New clothes are so much fun, I think.  And, having kids that didn't complain, Even BETTER!

post #52 of 60

Maman, pain in the pubic bone! I'm feeling it too - I've been trying to narrow down what causes it but haven't found a definite answer yet.  Gets worse in the evenings, especially when getting up, or walking uphill, can feel it every time I roll over at night.  Mine seems to come and go throughout the last week.  We've been traveling though, so lots of walking, stairs, lugging suitcases, sitting for long periods etc.

AFM, I have weeks worth of MDC to catch up on, looking fwd to it :)  We just got home from Sicily, had a great time but I am so happy to be back in my own house.  I weighed myself this evening (especially dangerous after flying and eating junk all day) and got a fright.  Two weeks of eating only in restaurants (and many big bowls of fresh pasta, homemade bread, gelato, etc) will do that I guess.  I have no self control in restaurants, and also found myself eating a lot just to make sure I wouldn't be uncomfortably hungry before our next meal - as has been happening sometimes since I've been pregnant and we often had to search for restaurants that were open since it wasn't the high season.  Big salads and plenty of good protein for me this summer, can't afford to gain much more!! :)


In other, bigger news, my little brother is getting married! He's 24 and is expecting a baby with his GF (she's 21) this July.  A few days ago he proposed to her, she said yes, and they have planned a civil ceremony in two weeks in our hometown.  I heard about it through an e-mail from my mom, she found out when she overheard my step-brother ask my brother how the proposal went.  At first my parents weren't invited to the ceremony, my brother and his GF wanted it to be just them, but then she sent my mom an email (?!) (they live on my parents' property - so less than 1 minutes walk to their house) saying that they could come.  My brother and his GF (who I've met several times and have e-mailed with) haven't even told me about the engagement yet, but I see that it's been posted on Facebook.  So basically, he didn't bother to tell me, I haven't been invited, and couldn't make it anyway because I live overseas and it's 2 weeks away.  My brother and I don't talk that much, but we get along and there's been no fighting or anything to help this make sense.  I purposefully organized my wedding to be on a date I knew he could make it, and told my entire family all at once when I got engaged. Not that he needs to do the same thing, but just for background. He could have at least called after telling my parents and invited me knowing I couldn't make it, just for the gesture. I'm hurt, wondering if I'm overreacting, wondering how to approach him, maybe I just congratulate him and send a gift - but it seems kind of distant.  My husband thinks that he's just introverted (but admitted that he would hit the roof if his sister pulled this kind of thing), I think he (my brother) is just immature and trying to act independent.  FWIW, I also heard via e-mail (again, from my mom, he never mentioned it) when he found out that he was going to be a dad. I have a telephone! And I call my family all the time, at least weekly.  I've reached out to his GF several times in e-mail and in person when I was visiting earlier this year, because we're both pregnant, she usually responds nicely but kind of formally and never reaches out herself.  Why would she not make sure that her future husband tells his family appropriately and that immediate family (I'm his only full sibling, step-sibs are recent) are invited to the wedding?!! Why would she not want to start her married life with a close relationship with her new family? Or any relationship, not even particularly close? I need to cool down about this, so any insight would be very appreciated. 


I'm 25 weeks on Wednesday, can't believe how fast things are moving along.  Have a great week everyone!

Edited by MIrandaM - 5/27/12 at 12:06pm
post #53 of 60
Miranda, If your brother doesn't know that these things hurt you, he doesn't even have a chance of trying. It is quite likely that these things are not important to him, that an email from mom or a facebook notification is a perfectly reasonable way for him to gather important family information. In that case, tell him (once) that you are hurt to not be told first hand about such important things- that you love him, and you want to have a chance to congratulate him. If you go to him blaming him for not meeting expectations you've never told him about, he will get defensive and likely avoid you in similar future situations. You have every right to feel everything you feel, whether you are pregnant or not. But please allow for the fact that, for now, this is who your brother is, and expecting something different from him will likely only lead to you feeling hurt more often. Tell him how you feel, certainly, but the shorter path to happiness is in changing your expectations rather than changing the people you love.
post #54 of 60

My keyboard is fixed yay!


help007 - That is so true and has been a long painful lesson in my own life but so so true. 


Miranda - I hope things work out that sucks when close family hurt you like that.

post #55 of 60

Help007, that is very good advice, I really appreciate it.  That's exactly why I wrote, because I find myself reacting so emotionally when it comes to him and obviously I can really use some objective advice.  The brother-sister relationship is a complex one for us :) For some reason it's much easier for me to alter my expectations to fit better with behavior from my mom or husband, but maybe that's because I can more easily see where they're coming from because we are much more similar, so adjusting to fit them is usually easy and I can make sense of it.  With my brother applying my own logic doesn't get me anywhere in trying to figure out his behavior - so I revert to kind of a lizard brain of anger and hurt.  I'll speak to him about it, love that you put specify 'once', lol, and then just expect to find out about their next baby or major life event through an e-mail from my mother :) Maybe eventually it'll become a joke between us. smile.gif



MamanFrancaise, regarding the pubic bone again . . . I found this quote from this thread and just tried it, not a miracle cure but it seems to have worked pretty well.  The pain's not totally gone but I can stand up, roll over, etc without it hurting even more.  I did 2-3 sets in a row but have only tried it this one time. 

"Lay on the floor with your knees bent and feet flat on the floor. Have an adult stand straddling your knees. Have them use their knees to hold yours together, while you try to spread them apart. Hold this for about 30 seconds. Then switch and have your legs on the outside, theirs on the inside, and try to squeeze their legs together, and hold for about 30 seconds.

You can do this as often as you need to, but honestly, I get plenty of relief doing it once or twice every few days-but I may just be lucky."
post #56 of 60

@MirandaM: I think my brother would be just the same as yours. We get along well and never fight but I don't think he would bother calling me if got married. He'd expect my parents to do it or the news getting over here via 'good news travel fast'. It's just a guess but I wouldn't be surprised if he would do it exactly like that. It's not that he don't want me there, it's just that the big announcement is not as important to him as it is to me.


Other than that...someone take my debit card from me please. We just now came back from yet another trip to TARGET and I got a sleeping bra (these girls are getting hard to handle at night lol) and a nursing cami, plus two regular tanktops and other stuff I really didn't need but it's nice to have :).


In pregnancy related news: my pregnancies are very boring, thank goodness. So, no news here. Baby is kicking nicely, I'm having some troubles breathing when laying down but other than that, no pain, no swelling, no cravings or aversions...nada...just a plain ol pregnancy.

post #57 of 60

MM- I'm so glad you got better advice that what I would give you.  Cause I would be HURT and pissed!  At least my SIL make sure my brother calls.  He's kinda spacey like that.  I do tend to get a lot of info second hand, but usually NOT weddings and babies, at the very least I get a text.  Which works for me cause at least he's using the phone.  LOL


Yeah, I'd tell him once, when you are NOT emotional.  Then leave it at that.  (personally, if he kept doing it I'd IGNORE any info i got from mom in front of him.  you know, you call him and he starts talking about baby M talked today... 'who's baby M?  you've never told me about baby M?'  'my wife and I went to the movies.  Your WIFE?  when the hell did you get married?")


Yeah, passive aggressive much?  (-me, not you-)

post #58 of 60

Yesterday I was soo tired I couldn't bring myself to accomplish much at all. In between cooking, dishes, and laundry I just lay in bed most of the day and the kids got way too much "screen time". I find myself wishing that the kid's school year wasn't ending so soon. With the adrenal fatigue I am supposed to be resting a lot. I need to work out how exactly I am supposed to do that over the summer.


When I called my midwife about the kids being exposed to fifth disease at school, she said there is a blood test that can be done but not to worry because its a bigger concern in the first tri. But then she said she had someone in her office and had to go. So it seems she isn't worried at all, I don't know if I need to get a blood test or not.


We aren't doing much for memorial day. My DH is working overtime today, so we'll probably just go and spend some time by the pool today. 


LO is a kicker, and mostly at night! LOL two nights ago he woke me up in the middle of the night, his kicks actually startled me awake lol.gif

post #59 of 60

MM- I can only relate to your brother in this situation, and not you! I didn't tell anyone in my family when my sweetheart and I were getting married- my parents found out when they opened a letter from the US govt addressed to me at their address (I use their address as my address in the US) talking about our fiance visa application process. For me, marriage is a legal loophole I had to jump through so that my sweetheart and I have the official right to live in the same country. I don't have any idea if or when I talked to my sister about it- it's that unimportant to me. WRT my pregnancy, I told my parents because I visited them in the first trimester when I was throwing up seven or eight times a day, and probably I told my sister? I have no idea. I know she knows. In regards to your brother's sweetheart having any responsibility in getting him to communicate better with you- that's another foreign idea to me. Why would she have any responsibility for his family relationships? That seems kind of controlling or something. I also don't really understand why she would have a vested interest in cultivating a relationship with you unless you click or like each other or something- just because you are the sister of her beloved doesn't mean you will have things in common or want to be friends. If my sister's boyfriend was sending me random chatty emails I would be extremely surprised. I've met him and I like him and we will comment on each other's facebook stuff, and that's enough for me.  

post #60 of 60
yeah, my brother knows I'm currently pregnant but I think my mom told him. He called to congratulate me and didn't seem put out that I hadn't told him.
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