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looking for support/advice...

post #1 of 28
Thread Starter 

Hi, I am new here but have been lurking on this board for a few weeks now without introducing myself, in large part because I miscarried in March and part of me has been hesitant to 'believe' in this pregnancy.  I will be eight weeks on Sunday and feel very pregnant, dry-heaving all morning today, crazy dreams, lots of napping.  Anyway, so this evening after coming home from work I noticed blood after I went pee and I'm spinning...  I never had any spotting or bleeding with my first pregnancy (I have a five year old son), and the bleeding last time ended in miscarriage so my heart is just sinking.  I guess I'm looking for some of the more experienced mamas to give me some perspective here.  I have yet to make an appointment with a doc or midwife because I wanted to make sure this baby made it through the first trimester but I'm so nervous I plan to call tomorrow first thing.  I'm pretty against ultrasound this early but don't know if there's any other way to know if things are ok?  I don't know...  Everything I'm reading says that about 1/4 of pregnancies have bleeding and half of those end in miscarriage.  I can't believe I'm in that 1/8th percent again, so soon.  And no idea which side of that equation I'll end up on.  Anyone been through anything similar or have experienced first trimester bleeding?  Thanks for hearing me... 

post #2 of 28

I haven't been through this myself, but have had friends go through it.  I believe if the blood is a darkish color that is better than if it's bright red. Many women spot all through the first trimester and everything is just fine though!  I know it must be so stressful especially after going through what you already have.  I am currently taking wild yam (2 pills in the morning and 2 pills in the evening) and using natural progesterone cream every day.  These will up your progesterone levels and help sustain the pregnancy if you are miscarrying.  I started using them because of a short luteal phase and to prevent another chemical pregnancy (super early miscarriage). Just make sure if you use them, you remember to take them every day.  Stopping suddenly before the 2nd trimester could cause a miscarriage as well.  :)

post #3 of 28
Thread Starter 

Well, I woke up this morning needing to vomit as usual and the bleeding is gone... Hopefully this was just a scare and nothing more.  I am going to see today if my co-op has the wild yam supplements in stock.  Where would I get natural progesterone cream?  Should I wait to make sure I need the supplements before I take them?  Any adverse effects to taking extra progesterone if it's unnecessary?  Thank you for the advise... Btw, I'm an Amanda B, myself!  

post #4 of 28

HotSauce, I'm in the same position. I will be 9 weeks this coming Monday, m/c in March super early, and still disbelieving it all. Despite the tests at home and at a clinic. 

 

I usually get HG and so far it's been incredibly mild, so I feel nervous, like it's not quite real. I'll be doing an early u/s just to see what's going on. I feel like I need that info. 

post #5 of 28
Thread Starter 

Have you had any spotting this time?  My heart just sank when I saw red blood, but today it's gone and it really wasn't much at all in retrospect... It's just hard having just been through a m/c and I had a hard time dealing.  I was a bartender and hit the sauce pretty hard to cope for a few weeks before pulling myself out of it and deciding to try to move on.  I feel like so many of these ladies are so experienced in the love and loss game and I'm just not.  I have my five year old son and that's it so to me a positive test always ends in a beautiful baby.  I was so naive and unprepared for losing that pregnancy.  I'm superstitious, too, so part of me thinks if I lose this one perhaps I'm not meant to have kids with my fiance or something.  I don't know that I would be able to try again with him if we lost another one.  I guess nothing to do but wait and see... Are you taking progesterone at all?

post #6 of 28

hug.gif  I had a loss in September and then another loss in February, so I'm very cautious this time around.  I'm almost still afraid to get my hopes up this time around.  Both times spotting was bad news for me previously, so I'm checking the TP every time I go to the bathroom this time.

 

Hmmm, should we start a PAL (pregnancy after loss) thread since there are quite a few of us?  Help support each other.

post #7 of 28

Nothing much to add, but I also had a loss in March and am having trouble thinking this one is going to be successful.  I had cramping and weird brown spotting last week for a few days, went to get an U/S this week (supposedly 6 weeks) because I was freaking out, but it was too early to tell (or perhaps I'm going to miscarry).  It is so hard to wait!  To top it all off, I'm having next to no symptoms...I'm pretty sure that by this time last time I had sore breasts and other symptoms, but so far with this one, I feel great...which is worrisome.  My MW said that it could just be really early, which is possible since I'm not sure when I ovulated, but it seemed like my horny stage (which is how I guage ovulation!) lasted extra long and we DTD a lot.

 

Hugs to all who are going through this!

post #8 of 28
((Hugs)) to anyone who's spotting and worrying right now. It no fun. I'm in the same boat. I've had spotting for every pregnancy, including this one for the past week. It helps to remember that I spotted when I was 6-12 wks pg with DD, but my odds are just not that good and spotting is usually the first sign that things aren't going to last. I have an u/s scheduled for tomorrow (7 weeks), so I should know either way. I will be heartbroken if I need to leave another DDC. :-(
post #9 of 28
Thread Starter 

wow.  It helps to know so many of us are in the same boat, although it's certainly not something I would wish on anyone else.  I like the idea of a PAL thread.  Just having other women who really 'get' it is comforting to me, especially since DP, though really wonderful in a lot of ways, just isn't what I would call a compassionate, sensitive guy.  I wish I knew a better way to make him understand what pregnancy is like and how hormones affect us ladies, and how 'real' a baby is even when it's super early in a pregnancy.  Way before I feel a kick or hear a heartbeat I'm affected through dreams, crazy cravings, sickness, etc.  To him, if he doesn't feel, see, hear, touch or taste it it doesn't exist!  I'm thinking of all of you going through this, and best of luck in the coming weeks!  I don't want to leave another DDC either.  I just want to get to that safe zone so I can really start believing and planning and dreaming.  Knock on wood, but I bought a gorgeous feather patterned swaddling blanket the other day in organic cotton and have been eyeing the lambskins at the farmer's market.  Think I'll wait until at least twelve weeks to make that purchase.  Positive thinking, ladies!!! 

post #10 of 28
Bad news. I should be 7 weeks today, but there's barely a flicker of the heart, and growth is behind by almost a week. :-( Scheduled an u/s for Wednesday & if there's no heartbeat we'll discuss options. 
post #11 of 28

Oh no.  hug.gif  I'll keep my fingers crossed that you get better news on Wednesday.

post #12 of 28
Thread Starter 

Good luck to you.  I know that waiting is so hard, just try to stay as positive as possible and let us know how it goes.  I'll be thinking about you..

post #13 of 28
Quote:
Originally Posted by hotsauce View Post

Have you had any spotting this time?  My heart just sank when I saw red blood, but today it's gone and it really wasn't much at all in retrospect... It's just hard having just been through a m/c and I had a hard time dealing.  I was a bartender and hit the sauce pretty hard to cope for a few weeks before pulling myself out of it and deciding to try to move on.  I feel like so many of these ladies are so experienced in the love and loss game and I'm just not.  I have my five year old son and that's it so to me a positive test always ends in a beautiful baby.  I was so naive and unprepared for losing that pregnancy.  I'm superstitious, too, so part of me thinks if I lose this one perhaps I'm not meant to have kids with my fiance or something.  I don't know that I would be able to try again with him if we lost another one.  I guess nothing to do but wait and see... Are you taking progesterone at all?

 

No spotting this time. After my first loss in 2005, I spent several months a little drunker than I should have. hug.gif

I do have progesterone, but I didn't take any this time. 

post #14 of 28
Quote:
Originally Posted by thecoffeebean View Post

Bad news. I should be 7 weeks today, but there's barely a flicker of the heart, and growth is behind by almost a week. :-( Scheduled an u/s for Wednesday & if there's no heartbeat we'll discuss options. 

 

Oh, sweetie, I'm so sorry. :( So very sorry. :( I do hope things are positive on Wednesday. heartbeat.gif

post #15 of 28

I had an awful dream last night that I miscarried. It was so vivid, that I took another test this morning, just to be sure. Still positive, but this pregnancy feels so weird to me. I'm used to being incredibly sick, but I haven't been this time. I've thrown up maybe half a dozen times, total, when in the past I've puked half a dozen times by 9 AM. (Not exaggerating.) I have nausea so bad that I can't eat. But overall, I'm doing very well. It's strange and feels unreal.

post #16 of 28

Hi hotsauce,

 

I have had bleeding in the first trimester with both my pregnancies and they resulted in healthy babies so it sure does happen. I also miscarried in Feb and the spotting just got heavy and was accompanied by a lower back pain and heaviness so I knew... This time around yes I am spotting again and I know how you feel - it sucks! But I believe that if you have morning sickness to the point that you vomit (as you have) then the chances of miscarriage are very low. Good luck and try to trust that whatever is happening is right for you right now :)

post #17 of 28

I've been fairly terrified about miscarriage here too because this pregnancy was unexpected and I'm an older mom now.  I can say that I have had bleeding in one past pregnancy.  In my case, it was likely caused by a low lying placenta and vigorous intercourse (blame DH ha!).  It was very disconcerting, I woke up the next morning, went to the bathroom and there was a plethora of blood.  Really scary amount.  Enough that the midwives wanted to do an early ultrasound (which I wasn't a fan of).  That was my only episode in that pregnancy, but it was scary.  My mom told me she had a lot of spotting when she was pregnant with me (none with her other three).  

 

It's hard for this to feel really *real* yet...I think once I hear the heartbeat I might realize it is really real.  Even though I'm sick and exhausted like I usually am when newly pregnant, since this was unexpected it doesn't really feel real (every other kid was planned).

post #18 of 28

Yeah, I understand that "not really real" feeling. I'm wearing maternity clothes and still feel like, "What if it's just a weird cancer?"

 

Who thinks that?!

post #19 of 28

redface.gif ummm...me>! I have been feeling as if this pregnancy is soo different from my other four! I have been EXTREMELY tired, and yet only minimally nauseous. It is so strange to feel this way because I am always super sick to the point of getting dehydrated and having to go to the er. I usually have hyperemisis gravidarum but this time I have barely puked. I do sometimes feel nauseous but nothing as extreme as normal. I hope that everything is ok with this little one...I have to get a dating ultrasound on Monday because I never had a cycle after the last baby. I hope it begins to feel more real and I can't wait to know how far along I am!
 

post #20 of 28
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mammajamma View Post

redface.gif ummm...me>! I have been feeling as if this pregnancy is soo different from my other four! I have been EXTREMELY tired, and yet only minimally nauseous. It is so strange to feel this way because I am always super sick to the point of getting dehydrated and having to go to the er. I usually have hyperemisis gravidarum but this time I have barely puked. I do sometimes feel nauseous but nothing as extreme as normal. I hope that everything is ok with this little one...I have to get a dating ultrasound on Monday because I never had a cycle after the last baby. I hope it begins to feel more real and I can't wait to know how far along I am!
 

 

 

OMG, SAME HERE!!! I am nauseated to the point of losing weight (10 lbs in 2 wks), but that's it. It's bizarre. At least if I was puking myself into the ER I'd KNOW. :p lol

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