Edited by nhklh - 11/16/13 at 2:35am
nhklh - I'm totally with you on not liking to tell people. I've been tossing around the idea of sending cards to relatives/friends this time, maybe with a picture of our kid wearing an "I'm going to be a big sister" shirt or something similar. My husband thinks our family members would be deeply offended by not getting a personal phone call. I'm looking forward to reading what others have to say about this too.
I know that when I was struggling with infertility, I really appreciated the friends who let me know they were pregnant via a private email or message before they made a big public announcement. It gave me a chance to go through my own emotions and then be happy for them without having to react immediately. I definitely plan on doing it this way with the friends I have who I know are still dealing with IF.
Since this is our first, and we have been trying for so long, I've actually really enjoyed being able to tell people. But I think that sending a card/photo to people is sweet as well. There are definitely some family members that I would feel weird calling just to say "I'm pregnant" since we don't generally talk on the phone otherwise. I figure they can find out on Facebook with everyone else, and if they're offended, that's something they just have to deal with.
For my family, I just plan on telling them I'm pregnant. For work, I got this shirt from cafepress: http://www.cafepress.com/mf/34063058/razz-baby_maternity I'm just going to wear it one day so I don't have to tell individual people, just let them all see it on the shirt!
OK, I'm having not much of a clue here about telling....I'm figuring that likely after I have that midwife appointment where I hear the heartbeat I'm going to go and tell people around then. But this is #5...there are going to be some really shocked people as DH was pretty sure that #4 was it LOL. In fact I kind of remember him announcing that to the midwife after the last one was born woops! Thankfully he's all happy now about everything! Babies are a blessing, and I'm glad that he agrees! I think *most* of the people in my family are going to agree. However, I have that feeling I'm going to get a lot of pressure to move, etc. I really need ideas...
My mom has had some weird reactions to previous announcements. So I carefully made sure to tell her WITH DH & the kids there, and what we did was give her a card signed by each of us - and "baby-to-be December 19, 2012". That worked out well.
My dad's wife struggled with IF for a long time. He and she recently adopted two pre-teen girls (woot!) and I wasn't sure if my announcement would still be a sore point for her or not, so I called my dad directly and told him so he could decide whether to make it a general announcement or let his wife know first so she could adjust. Apparently it's not a sore point anymore because he immediately put me on speaker phone and let me hear all of them squealing with glee (that was fun).
Other than that, I let DH tell his mom who will tell everybody on his side of the family, and I've told a few other people in person. I plan to announce on FB after about 12 weeks and to announce publicly at work around the same time. I don't think I'll be very creative with those announcements - just the facts! Although I am making sure to point out to people that based on my history, we are not expecting a Solstice or Christmas or New Year's baby - our goal is going to be 'get past Thanksgiving'!
When I told my mom, she replied with, "I wish you hadn't done that."
I get HG (incredibly sick, lose weight, need IV fluids) with my pregnancies, so she's just concerned for that, but jeez, what a way to say it. :p
I had a miscarriage in March so when I got pregnant again right away, I didn't say anything. I still haven't fully announced it, I just make comments on my facebook about baby registries and ergo carriers and general pregnancy stuff. lol
Hugs to all of you who have a sucky time with this! I've told most of my friends, now that I'm past 12 weeks, (and totally starting to show.) Dh and my parents knew right after we found out. All that is left to tell is my giant extended family, which I'll do in about two weeks. We moved about 8 hours away from our family a few years ago and the kids and I will be back in town in another week. My grandma is celebrating her 80th birthday so everyone will get together for that. I'm thinking of making some kind of big sister outfits for the dds and letting everyone figure it out that way.
We haven't made any type of announcement yet other than to family...just mention it to people as we see them. I think we may do the FB thing after 12 weeks (which is next week...yikes!).
I don't really look forward to it since this makes 3 pregnancies back to back and people's first reactions are usually strange! haha
We told my immediate family right away, but haven't told my partner's family yet. They are a pretty homophobic lot and we are not really looking forward to the judgement. They live far away and we joke that we will just wait till after the baby is born to tell them. My two best friends also got told right away (one of them is also pregnant and due 5 weeks before me, which is awesome). Other than that, we have told people as we see them or as it feels appropriate. It seems sort of awkward doing the whole facebook announcement thing since I hardly post there, but it does seem like the easiest way to get the info out to my far away friends and family. If we do decide to facebook announce, I am thinking of going through and weeding anyone from my friend's list first though who might be anything but completely happy for us and supportive (I'm looking at you conservative christian cousins).