Originally Posted by Cyllya
Is that really what you think that would happen? If you were in any emergency situation that required action on your part while your child was present, is that how you would act?
Your husband: "Honey, the house is on fire. We need to evacuate."
You: "Hold on, the baby is crying."
(And then you plop yourself down in your favorite nursing spot while the house burns around you.)
Sure it's best to respond to your child's hunger ASAP, but regardless of whether you're a stay-at-home mom or a professional bringing your child to work, I think there are inevitably going to be times where you can't drop everything and put your kid to the breast right that second. That is a bummer for the kid, certainly, but if people were irreparably harmed by that happening a couple times throughout their infancy, I don't think humanity would have survived this long.
Yeah, I sincerely doubt that this scenario would play out that way...and whatever "damage" occurs to the child for having to wait could very well be ALOT less than Mom jumping up and leaving them with whomever she can find in a hurry. Particularly if they are not used to being left - someone mentioned that "a baby that age can be left" - maybe, maybe not - my DS certainly couldn't! If the child is easy going, used to being left with a trusted caregiver who is available, maybe. But the 24/7 nature of the job means that perfect scenario might not line up - and alot of babies are *very* sensitive to being left, to abrupt changes in plans, etc. I know if it were me, I'm WAAAY more likely to be distracted by imagining my child freaking out at my absence than by him snuggling safely on my body.
The only real issue I see here is whether the baby crying would possibly add to the chaos and stress of a true emergency.
...there's a difference between, "You should turn this midwife down if you don't want the baby there," and "This midwife is unprofessional and incompetent for wanting to bring a baby."
I don't think anyone has said that the OP should force herself out of her comfort zone and accept a baby being present at the cost of her emotional wellbeing. If it would be distracting for you, perhaps decline. But I don't get the downward slide into judgment going on...