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Telling? - Page 3

post #41 of 60

I am struggling with this as well. I really wanted to wait until the first trimester was over. I keep thinking about the 35% chance of miscarriage (as I am 41). I don't have any of my own kids so its my nieces and nephew I'm concerned about. My sister is horribly ill with breast cancer and I just don't want those kids to have any more pain or bad news. My sister knows and she is thrilled, as it gives us something positive to focus on and look forward to. My sister wants to tell her kids, I think I'll leave the decision up to her. Gonna see the whole family for a picnic today. My avoiding the sangria is gonna raise a few questions for sure. loveeyes.gif  

post #42 of 60

Jess- Once you hear/see the heartbeat the chance of loss decreases.  Is is so scary to see that number 35%, but I really think that already seeing the heartbeat changes the statistic significantly. That is a really tough situation, with your sister. It must be incredibly difficult.  The best thing we can be is hopeful and positive. Hang in there.
 

post #43 of 60

Momma41 really? That makes me feel better! I keep hearing about women who miscarry at 10 weeks...12 weeks...13 weeks...I just can't imagine. Momma...can I ask you a personal question? You must be an incredibly strong person. Have you really had 8 losses? 

post #44 of 60

I've heard numbers as dramatic as 3-5% chance of m/c after seeing a heartbeat. I don't want to know if it's wrong because I'm hanging on to that pretty hard in the 12 weeks between my first and second ultrasound (only 11 more to go!).

 

Everytime I hear of the women who miscarry later I have decided that they are the simply the 3-5% and try to remember that many women don't post all over the internet about healthy pregnancies, but most who are struggling with loss do, so their numbers online will make it seem like it happens more often than it does.

post #45 of 60

i was getting close to wanting to tell the general public, but i think now i'm definitely going to wait until after my next appointment in 2 weeks (i'll be over 11 weeks then). i'm extremely terrified of a missed miscarriage at this point. (which i didn't even know could happen until a couple weeks ago)

post #46 of 60
Quote:
Originally Posted by kitt

 in a BIG SISTER shirt on facebook and let people figure it out

Super cute idea~~

post #47 of 60
Quote:
Originally Posted by JessNP View Post

Momma41 really? That makes me feel better! I keep hearing about women who miscarry at 10 weeks...12 weeks...13 weeks...I just can't imagine. Momma...can I ask you a personal question? You must be an incredibly strong person. Have you really had 8 losses? 

 



:)  That is sweet of you to say. Yes, I would say that I can get through anything now. Crazy life!! It is pretty unbelievable the number of losses I have had. Most of them have been under 5weeks (so chemical?) but one at 13 weeks (ugh) one at 10, and 2 at 9 weeks. I have had 3 different doctors. I am a mystery to the doctors/mw. I personally think my miscarriages have to do with my celiac disease which no ob or mw has ever agreed with. This pregnancy I have been ultra careful that everything I put in my mouth is gluten free. I am also taking high doses of vitamin D along with my fish oil and wonderful prenatal vit.

 

I am the type of person that pushes myself, whether it is landscaping the yard or my work. I know that I should not blame myself but I know that I overdid it with most of my pregnancies. I know that some women are concerned about exercise and keeping fit....I just want to sit around and let the little bean have all my energy. Who cares if my butt gets fat.

 

I am 8 weeks today and saw the heartbeat on Tuesday. I am feeling good and sick which is reassuring. I have told many close friends and family about the pregnancy. I need their support.heartbeat.gif

 

I have been waiting for it to be the right time for me.  I think this one is gonna stick!!!  All we can do is take great care of ourselves then let go.....namaste.gif

post #48 of 60

Momma41 my heart goes out to you! I hope your little bean sticks around hug2.gif


Edited by loveandgarbage - 7/6/12 at 6:42pm
post #49 of 60
Ok, ladies, we're telling everyone tomorrow at DH's 30th birthday party.
We've aleady told best friends: squeals and jumping smile.gif
My parents: squeals and running for hugs!
DH's mom and sister: forced smile and no obnoxious comments (thank god. this is a major improvment for her)


But tomorrow we will have about 50 people here and we're going to make an announcement. So far, the best reactions have been when we tell people we are pregnant and let them get all excited and hug and cry and smile and then after everything gets quiet we say, "And its TWINS!" and it all starts over again. Any great ideas?
post #50 of 60
Quote:
Originally Posted by Adaline'sMama View Post

But tomorrow we will have about 50 people here and we're going to make an announcement. So far, the best reactions have been when we tell people we are pregnant and let them get all excited and hug and cry and smile and then after everything gets quiet we say, "And its TWINS!" and it all starts over again. Any great ideas?

I love this! Wish I had fun ideas for you... all I can thinking of is somehow making the party twin themed but I have no idea how to do that!

 

So I'm pretty sure I'll spill the beans to my dad and stepmom this Sunday when we visit them. I just know my stepmom will make a comment about me not eating much (she's always made comments about my weight/weird vegan eating habit and I think a lot of it is her projecting her body image issues onto me) and I'll just blurt out why. It probably won't be a good reaction so I'm just going to brace myself and maybe let DH take over if it gets rough. My sister and I were joking today that I should said my imaginary IUD slipped and that way I'd just get pity which is much better than judgment! Of course I won't do that but it's so, so tempting.

post #51 of 60
Whoops! Sorry Jean! Didn't catch that you're vegan on the other thread...so no gnawing on blocks of cheese for you. Maybe just a bunch of perfectly ripe avocados and a box of Tofutti Cities. wink1.gif
post #52 of 60

Now that sounds delicious!

post #53 of 60
I'm getting nervous....we've never told a whole group of people at once before.
post #54 of 60

I would be nervous too because I hate attention on me-- but everyone's going to be so happy for you! It will be wonderful.

post #55 of 60

Still hiding it from the family over here, my belly isnt big so its easy to hide for now 

post #56 of 60
Adaline'smama- tell us how the big announcement goes!


Had a close friend over today ( never see her in person)... i was thinking about telling her, but it just never came up. I want to wait till we get to hear the heartbeat.
post #57 of 60
It went well! Everyone was really excited!
post #58 of 60

Told my BFF who lives thousands of miles away and I haven't seen in years, and told my son's physical therapist so she'd understand why I started crying for NO REASON AT ALL during one of his appointments.  Then, this past week, we told a couple that we are friends with so they would know why I wasn't drinking at their wedding on the 3rd.  Other than that, no one knows.  I really like the idea of keeping it a secret for as long as humanly possible this time (since everyone knew at about 4 weeks last time), or at least until my MaterniT21 screen comes back.  However, I have a TON of family coming into town this week for a big celebration of sorts, and I am really tempted to take my favorite aunt with me to my ultrasound on Friday.  It would be an easier decision if she didn't suck so much at keeping secrets!

post #59 of 60
Quote:
Originally Posted by Adaline'sMama View Post

It went well! Everyone was really excited!

Wonderful!!

joy.gif

 

Quote:
Originally Posted by AKChix0r View Post

Told my BFF who lives thousands of miles away and I haven't seen in years, and told my son's physical therapist so she'd understand why I started crying for NO REASON AT ALL during one of his appointments.  Then, this past week, we told a couple that we are friends with so they would know why I wasn't drinking at their wedding on the 3rd.  Other than that, no one knows.  I really like the idea of keeping it a secret for as long as humanly possible this time (since everyone knew at about 4 weeks last time), or at least until my MaterniT21 screen comes back.  However, I have a TON of family coming into town this week for a big celebration of sorts, and I am really tempted to take my favorite aunt with me to my ultrasound on Friday.  It would be an easier decision if she didn't suck so much at keeping secrets!

I agree...its kinda fun! Especially when i pop out and say Im (maybe 6 months?) pregnant....surprise!!

post #60 of 60

I've told the people I'm around all the time since I had to offer some explanation for the urgent flights to the bathroom, but I have plans for my family and my close friends who live away from me:

 

I plan to visit my hometown in mid August (I should be just past 16 weeks) and I'm going wait until someone notices. I'm already showing a bit, so I would imagine it'll be a significant bump by then but it'll be fun to watch them struggle to decide if I've just gained weight  ;)

 

I also have a good friend that I've been meaning to get back in contact with, but I decided that I'm going to wait until I'm very visibly pregnant and just text her to come out for coffee with me or something. I figure it'll be fun to see the look on her face when I show up
 

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