Bajingo Juice helps the June Bugs make babies - TTC#1 in our 30's - June 2012 - Page 3

[dakipode]

Hello ladies,

I realized I hadn't posted in this month's thread yet and the month is almost over. I see some of you in other threads but I really felt the need to connect with the Bajingo group tonight. I found myself getting upset when reading TTC posts from ladies who already are mommies and just thought I'd reach out to this group, those of us who are still working on #1.

Just wanted to vent a bit.

[Patience2013]

Hello,

I am new here & we have been TTC since 5/12.  We succeeded both months in getting PG, but MC both.   I am 32 yrs old.  I don't know what a chart is yet, but will look around & see what it is.  Wish I would of known about this site a while ago as before we conceived our 3rd & 4th daughters, we had many MC's & seems this site is a great support group!

[Patience2013]

Sorry I must of posted on the wrong thread. I seen 30's & thought it was just women in their 30's.  I already have 4 children (2 with my husband). Sorry I posted in the wrong place. Good luck to all of you & I do understand how hard it is to conceive & carry as it took me many tries with mine.  Many blessings! 

[librarygirl]

Originally Posted by dakipode 

Hello ladies,

I realized I hadn't posted in this month's thread yet and the month is almost over. I see some of you in other threads but I really felt the need to connect with the Bajingo group tonight. I found myself getting upset when reading TTC posts from ladies who already are mommies and just thought I'd reach out to this group, those of us who are still working on #1.

Just wanted to vent a bit.

Yes, yes, yes! I know I just got married and I worked hard on my career before now (I have a master's degree and a career I love), but I see friends and online acquaintances who are my age and have two or more kids and I can't help but think that I've fallen behind, because I made healthy financial choices. And it's hard to vent in real life because my close friends- one got married at 22 and finished her family by 30, two others are childless by choice, and the friend that understands the most is 36 and struggling with infertility so it just upsets her- though she totally feels the "left behind" thing. I try to be so sensitive because she constantly gets asked "you've been married for 4 years, when are you guys gonna have a baby?" and I know they've been trying since they got married 4 years ago. It's such a difficult topic, especially when you see all these other people having baby after baby and all you want is ONE (okay, I want 3 or 4 but right now, one will suffice). 

Patience2013, thanks for the well wishes. good luck to you on TTC. You're from Zanesville??? Very cool. I grew up in Marietta!

[kimble]

Originally Posted by dakipode 

Hello ladies,

I realized I hadn't posted in this month's thread yet and the month is almost over. I see some of you in other threads but I really felt the need to connect with the Bajingo group tonight. I found myself getting upset when reading TTC posts from ladies who already are mommies and just thought I'd reach out to this group, those of us who are still working on #1.

Just wanted to vent a bit.

Vent away, sister!

I too am struggling with this because my SIL is pregnant. We found out several months after we started TTC and so it hit me hard. My MIL has been wanting grandchildren since becoming an empty nester 12 years ago and since this will be her first, it's all she can think about. Plus, SIL is not that close to DH's family (she also married into it) and at times it feels that she is trying to use the pregnancy/baby as a wedge between us all. I still have hope that she will see the value in having willing family members nearby (and hopefully a niece/nephew close in age if we have our way!) and be more willing to let us into her life. It is also hard to keep MIL from finally pulling out the baby gear she has been storing for 30 years or running out and getting all the baby items she can find at rummage sales without telling her about my ulterior motives to protect our someday baby and focus her budget on what will be used. I can't imagine SIL will use the playpen MIL recently found, for example. At least I can get SIL pumping supplies and a baby carrier for her shower and feel like I am helping her babe with something more than cute (to SIL) nursery decor.

Anyway, that's my rant.

On a happier note, I hope everyone is getting some change to enjoy the summer weather and fresh produce! Just think that if we get knocked up soon, we'll have little ones to share it all with next year. Those kinds of thoughts help me appreciate the little things like enjoying quiet time outside with DH. Ahhhh.

[lilacvioletiris]

dakipode and librarygirl, I know the feeling about feeling left behind having turned 36 this month and so many people around me having babies or many of them in the time I have been TTC.  It has been exciting to see the ladies on the pregnant Bajingo thread who are just about to have babies.  I know how long a few of them tried before they finally got pregnant.  Gives me hope.

AFM, DH was able to provide a sample to be frozen for our future IVF cycle.  There were 5 sperm that were moving and 3 sperm that weren't moving.  Last time DH had a sperm assay there was only 1 moving sperm so 5 is better.  Dr. told DH he needs to provide another sample to freeze for our IVF cycle.  We are saving toward the IVF and it looks like most of the procedures will be covered by  my insurace so right we are saving our money for the parts that won't be covered by insurance (like some weird "ART case management" which I think is just to cover people being on the phone when I have questions and push paper around to where it needs to go but costs $978).  We need $2250 dollars to covere everything before we can even begin taking meds for the IVF procedure.

[dakipode]

Originally Posted by kimble 

On a happier note, I hope everyone is getting some change to enjoy the summer weather and fresh produce! Just think that if we get knocked up soon, we'll have little ones to share it all with next year. Those kinds of thoughts help me appreciate the little things like enjoying quiet time outside with DH. Ahhhh.

That is a beautiful thought. I hope I'll be able to share my experiences with motherhood with you all soon, I definitely feel a cameraderie here and would love to be able to share the journey into parenthood with you ladies as well!

lilac, I'm keeping my fingers crossed for you and DH. Five is definitely better than one! Sounds like you have a plan!

[lilacvioletiris]

kimble I love your idea of sharing fresh produce with our little ones next year.  Makes me want to get more out of my garden.

dakipode, it does fee great to have a plan.  I can't remember who said it but "if you fail to plan, then you plan to fail".  Plan is in place, not just to get the money to make it happen.

[iixivboots]

Do NOT give up hope, ladies!

My dear friend Calycanth had her beautiful baby girl on Friday. We were on this thread together so long and now she's a momma and I will be soon! It's unreal.

[lilacvioletiris]

Thanks boots.  It is reassuring that others have waited a long time to get pregnant and then finally had their baby.

[doularebekah]

Hey ladies, sorry I haven't been around for awhile. Good to see that everyone is well though - lilac, how great that your husband was able to produce a viable sample! I'm really cheering for you both :)

dakipode, kimble & librarygirl (and lilac!) - I totally hear you on sometimes getting down or frustrated on this journey. Of course I am happy for people getting pregnant, but I am so glad to have this place where I know everyone is in the same boat as me in terms of age and trying for their first. I think it is a unique position to be in and sometimes those are the only people who can support you best. A number of my friends are currently pregnant with their second or even third, and while I know a huge part of me not yet being a parent is down to my own choice, and that is a choice I am happy I made because I feel really happy with the position I'm in financially and career wise....but that doesn't make it any easier. I find it hard to not think about 'what if' situations...what if we'd tried sooner....who knows really? Trying sooner could have just meant trying for even longer than I have now! 

boots - Thanks so much for your words of encouragement! It's always great to see you when you pop in, and I know that you get where we're all at. It's so awesome to have living proof of this working!

afm - Well, I finally ovulated on CD31 (crazy!) according to FF. I never would have known, no symptoms or obvious temp spike, but looking at my chart now I can see the shift. I totally thought we'd be out this month but it looks like we had really good timing unintentionally. Since FF didn't give me crosshairs until about 5DPO I don't feel like I've had quite the 2ww I normally do. In saying that, I'm making up for it in worrying now - ha! I'm on school holiday for the next 2 weeks so don't have much to distract myself with and I'm really trying not to get my hopes up about my rising temps because I know they don't necessarily mean anything. They are different to my usual pattern though.....argh!

[librarygirl]

Originally Posted by doularebekah 

afm - Well, I finally ovulated on CD31 (crazy!) according to FF. I never would have known, no symptoms or obvious temp spike, but looking at my chart now I can see the shift. I totally thought we'd be out this month but it looks like we had really good timing unintentionally. Since FF didn't give me crosshairs until about 5DPO I don't feel like I've had quite the 2ww I normally do. In saying that, I'm making up for it in worrying now - ha! I'm on school holiday for the next 2 weeks so don't have much to distract myself with and I'm really trying not to get my hopes up about my rising temps because I know they don't necessarily mean anything. They are different to my usual pattern though.....argh!

I posted this on the ONE thread but I'm finding the absolute best distraction from TTC and TWW worries/obsession to be the 6 month old, high energy, adorable, snuggly Schnauzer/Poodle mix puppy we adopted two weeks ago. :) He keeps me occupied, distracted and there is no such thing as too hot/tired/lazy/migrainy to exercise today excuses when you're dealing with a dog that if he doesn't get his 3 mile walk, he acts likes he's on crack. At the moment he's worn out and snuggled beside me on the couch, but normally he's bouncing off the walls. DH hasn't warmed up to him quite yet (he thinks he's a pain in the ass) but he's actually very good for both of us and I adore my little Gryffindor Chaos (Gryffin for short).

cycle-wise, I think I O'd yesterday (CD19 and very normal for me) but I don't temp so waiting to see what CM looks like tomorrow to confirm for sure. We are in a NTNP cycle (I promised DH we wouldn't go crazy trying until August)  and only DTD twice while fertile so I don't know what our chances look like. I keep telling myself that there is no way possible this month, just so I'm not too disappointed when AF arrives.

Happy TTC, everyone!

[Patience2013]

librarygirl - Thanks.  I live about 15min outside of Zville in the country, but do all my shopping & appts there.  I have family that live near Marietta tho.

[deborahbgkelly]

Ha. I completely forgot I joined this thread, but the stats are wrong. I started TTC in 2/11. We had a successful IVF in November, but, unfortunately lost our identical twin sons to IUGR in March. We're working on our rainbow the old fashioned way in July and August and will go back to the clinic sometime in September if we have not been successful yet.

[deborahbgkelly]

Ha. I completely forgot I joined this thread, but the stats are wrong. I started TTC in 2/11. We had a successful IVF in November, but, unfortunately lost our identical twin sons to IUGR in March. We're working on our rainbow the old fashioned way in July and August and will go back to the clinic sometime in September if we have not been successful yet.

[lilacvioletiris]

Glad to see you back, DoulaRebekah.

Here is the link to the July thread - fireworks for all hopefully ending in some BFPs - it has been awhile.

http://www.mothering.com/community/t/1357166/fireworks-in-the-bajingo-juice-ttc-1-in-our-30s-july-2012