June Chat Thread - Page 5 « Back to Group Discussions

[tolovemercy]

Originally Posted by octolars 

37 weeks.  im a first timer, i thought i had everything planned out and now i am rethinking everything.  im lost in my head.  i just stare into space a lot, and i cry ALOT.  i haven't been eating well.  i am usually alspee my now, but im wide awake just staring at the ceiling freaking out.

I just want to keep her safe, which is what any mother wants, but im doubting my decision making, and i don't always want to be this anxious about everything.  i don't want to turn her into a bubble boy bc of my anxieties!

this part is very difficult, isn't it?  im in limbo.  im scared of labor, but i feel confident in myself.  i don't know what to expect, though.  

i keep thinking, have i done enough?  did i do everything i could to ensure a healthy baby?  and of course the answer is no.  i could have done beter, eaten better, exercised more, done more kegals, better research about infant care, blah blah blah, and here we go! im caught in the downward spiral again!

how can i teach my daughter to be a peaceful positive person when i can't calm myself down?  I'm just hoping that I will see her for the first time and everything will be ok.  that the breath ive been holding for a solid week will be exhaled, and peace will find me.  

i feel like such a debbie downer.   i really am a positive person, i am just fraught with anxiety over this incredible transition.  plus, the various nuances of pregnancy have made me a little grumpy.

Yeah.   I totally understand.   These sound like very normal late-pregnancy feelings (for me, at least.  this is my 4th).    I think it's important to let your mind think through those things that worry you, to let your fears wash over you, and then subside.   Remember that, especially in giving birth for the first time, you are not only giving birth to your baby, but becoming a new person- a mother- yourself.   Your feelings are new, but will be with you for a long, long time. 

And, of course, remember that nature has this planned out-  the first stages of your daughter's life are very basic.  She will want YOU, and she will want to eat and sleep.   There will be plenty of time for you to grow together, so take heart.  You'll be great.

[GoofyInOK]

Whew, I am so glad I decided to check in this morning- I, too am having these feelings like I'm going crazy!  Baby should be here any day now and I'm just feeling like such a failure for all the things I didn't do during pregnancy that I swore I was going to do.  I also could have eaten better, could have exercised more, could have done more emotional prep...  Sigh.  It's good to know that these feelings are normal.  I have been fairly successful with calming myself down when I'm really worked up, but they keep coming back.  I like what tolovemercy said about letting them wash over you and then subside- maybe trying to fight them isn't really the way to go, but to accept them and to accept that there's just no resolution right this moment and I'll have to wait and see what baby really is like when s/he is here.  I'm going to try that and see if I am a little more zen.

As much as I really, really want the baby to go ahead and be born because I'm excited / uncomfortable, the birth is starting to freak me out a little again, too.  I just want everything to go great, and to get through it without clamoring to the hospital for an epidural.  It's funny, early on I was so at peace about a home birth, and part of me still is, but I just keep wondering if I can handle transition.  I think I can...  It's probably best that I'll be at home, since even if I start to doubt myself, there's no pain meds here, and I will NOT want to get into a car to go get them!!!  LOL

  Hugs all around...  This is definitely a difficult time.  I am going to send good wishes to everyone today!

Oh, and CONGRATS to ms_mandolini!  :)  

[scowgirl]

Originally Posted by tolovemercy 

Yeah.   I totally understand.   These sound like very normal late-pregnancy feelings (for me, at least.  this is my 4th).    I think it's important to let your mind think through those things that worry you, to let your fears wash over you, and then subside.   Remember that, especially in giving birth for the first time, you are not only giving birth to your baby, but becoming a new person- a mother- yourself.   Your feelings are new, but will be with you for a long, long time. 

And, of course, remember that nature has this planned out-  the first stages of your daughter's life are very basic.  She will want YOU, and she will want to eat and sleep.   There will be plenty of time for you to grow together, so take heart.  You'll be great.

Just wanted to say that this was very reassuring for me as well. So thanks!! 

[scarykarrey]

Same here! Except I think I'm being lazy in my mad dash for last minute reading/work/prep, which just adds to my guilt!

[mrs_mandolini]

The hazards of 36 week baby + late cord clamping.. we're at the hospital under bilirubin lights right now! They were amazed and astonished by her high hematocrit levels, until they heard how long it was until the cord was clamped. I will say everyone has been really nice and no one said "YOU ARE CRAZY FOR HAVING A BABY AT HOME." It probably helps that we appear mostly normal to outsiders. ;-)

[tolovemercy]

Oh so sorry, mrs m!  Hope you and baby are well and home again soon.

[Shinyredstar]

Hope you're home soon, Mrs M, and that baby and mama are otherwise doing well!

[octolars]

Lots of love and peace to all the mamas!  It is nice to know we aren't alone.  We have similar fears and anxieties, and that makes them seem a little less scary.

for you, Mrs M, good luck to you and your family!  

[Nicole730]

Woohoo!  Baby girl Hadley is here.  Born this morning at 9:14am.  8lb6oz 20".  I will post more later, but we are doing great!

[tolovemercy]

Originally Posted by Nicole730 

Woohoo!  Baby girl Hadley is here.  Born this morning at 9:14am.  8lb6oz 20".  I will post more later, but we are doing great!

YAY! congrats, mama! rest up and enjoy!

[scowgirl]

Nicole730, that is awesome! I was just wondering how you were doing! Congrats!

[scarykarrey]

Oh man. We should start ticking people off the list!