sudden separation anxiety in 4 year old...

[nelson]

DS, just turned 4 and for the last two years or so, has been completely fine with separating, even to the point of asking me to drop him off at classes by himself and telling me how much he wants to go to preschool in the fall.  Well, I went with it and signed him up for a couple different camps this summer and possibly preschool next year.  He is now terrified.  He had a huge meltdown at a class that we attend once a week, where the parents go next door for 45min while the kids play, he has NEVER done this before.  He now says that he doesn't want to go to any camps or preschools and he even calls me into the same room with him while he is playing because he "doesn't want to be alone."  I don't know what to do.  We have a baby due at the end of Sept. so the camps and preschool were also a way for me to get a little break as well as a way for him to have fun.  One of the camps starts next week, and I really don't want to lose the money that we spent on it, and I do think he would enjoy it, but I don't know how to help him get over this by next week.  He is not usually like this, so I am kinda stuck with what a good strategy would be, extra time together?  Talking about it?  Not talking about it?  When I do try to bring it up, he gets very anxious, almost to the point of crying and tells me to, "Cancel those classes, okay Mama?"  I feel so bad for him right now.  TIA

[jannahberry]

Try talking to him and asking open ended questions that will encourage him to talk about why he's afraid to be alone. It could be a movie that he watched or possibly something that someone said to spark this sudden anxiety about being away from you. Also try to think about everyone that your child has been around while you were away and ask them if they have noticed any sudden changes in his behavior. Try not to think the worst but do be cognizant of the world we live in today... hope this helps :) God bless

[nelson]

He is never away from us.  He is with my DH 2x a week while I work and then with me the rest of the time.  I do think it might be because of all the talk about him being 4 now and such a big kid, and with the baby coming and classes and preschool actually starting, he is freaking out.  I just don't know how to talk him back down.  When I do ask him why he doesn't want to be away from me, he just says that he gets lonely.  I will try asking more questions though, although I can't tell if that just brings up the anxiety and if it's better to just let this pass on it's own.