June Rockstar (formerly Whatever'ing) Mamas 2012 - Page 9

[onetwoten]

Oh I can only imagine! I'm emotional already, and we're only halfway there, and haven't had half the year you have!

[MarineWife]

I searched and couldn't find a page entitled that, JJ.

I've been meaning to ask everyone what sites they use to blog. I set up a blog at Xanga (I think) several years ago. My plan was to blog about our lives as a sort of unschooling record keeping in case I ever needed it. I rarely wrote in it then and haven't even looked at it in I don't know how long. Maybe a different/better site would motivate me more? Any suggestions?

[onetwoten]

I used opendiary.com from 14 until about 24, but don't really write there anymore. It was private in the sense that no one I knew IRL knew of it and i wrote very candidly. I made a lot of really good online friendly there, and it had a good community feel like mdc does. It was very cathartic, and I miss being able to write like that, but when I sit down now, I can't seem to get the words out like I used to. 

I'm (edit: NOW, not not) at blogspot, which is much better for "public consumption", and I write for people I know, not personal things. I'm still kind of learning my way around it though. 

Edited by onetwoten - 6/17/12 at 6:44pm

[MarineWife]

My blog would be private. I wouldn't want to publish it. Maybe someday it could be used by all of us to look back on our life and reminisce. It would mainly just be like a diary of our daily lives more for my own purposes of knowing all the different things the kids do. Sometimes with unschooling it seems like we do the same bunch of nothing day after day so it's nice to have something to look back on and say, "Oh, yeah, we did this and this and that."

[akind1]

I use blogspot, because I don't care if it's public - nothing I've written isn't something I wouldn't have said here. But I know people that do use a password protected blog.

ok, you can make it private on blogger/blogspot (same thing) - http://support.google.com/blogger/bin/answer.py?hl=en&answer=42673

Great weekend, with the exception of my MIL. We went to visit and she decided to go up to her room and stay there. (she had foot surgery last week and was in some pain, which I get, but she didn't even say she was going, or tell the kids bye or anything) Had we known, we would've invited FIL to our house and not made the trip over. bah.

Sleep is better - having the crib sidecarred is such a help!  gives me just a tad more space to stretch out and relax. *ah*

Carrie - hooray for all your sleep - sounds amazing.

Baby pictures - I cry looking through Gabe's. Norah . . .not as much, because she is still a baby, but I will one day! Need to organize some.

[Baby_Cakes]

JJ that is a beautiful picture!  I voted!

As far as blogs go, I use blogspot but I'm so new at it really haven't figured much out.   I'm sure there are security settings to make it unsearchable on google.

I think Finn only woke once or twice last night!  And I'm pretty sure there was a slight wakeup where I was able to just ssshhhh and pat him and he went back to sleep!  I didn't need to get Chris or anything.  Oh man I hope this keeps up.  

Yesterday we went to my ILs for fathers day and Finn was so not interested in nursing.  I didn't offer that much either, because he was so busy playing and being silly.  I think he nursed at like 11 for nap, and then again at like 4.  He ate snacks throughout the day and a HUGE dinner, and then right before we were about to eat fruit for dessert, I grabbed him and found a quiet corner to nurse him in.  So -- maybe 3 times?  I was so sad.  I even mentioned it out loud and my MIL and Chris were like, he's getting older, he just doesn't need it as much.  But *I* DO!  It's so tough.  It's not a typical day by any means but it sure makes me realize how things are changing.

I get so sad looking at Finn's nb photos!  It's bittersweet and I cannot believe how tiny he was!  And I just remember how happy we all were.  I love the warm fuzzies I get looking though those pictures.  Sigh. 

Oh!  My MIL/FIL offered to let us have Finn's birthday party at their house.  I'm seriously considering taking them up on the offer.  Their house so bigger, they have a patio, deck, pool and nice big yard.  And a better kitchen for prepping food.  There's practically no reason not to!  

[onetwoten]

Kat--- ugh! Why are parents so frustrating like that? You'd think they would relish every moment they could spend with their grandkids, not hide out somewhere. 

Carrie-- AMAZING!!! That type of sleep is like my dream goal right now. 2 wakeups a night? Heck, I think I could do that for years!! 

Rob sat down and read some of no cry sleep solution with me last night, and we're going to start trying seriously to implement some stuff. I read it before, thought all the ideas were great, but then... was just too tired and distracted to really follow it. So we're starting with the environmental things, and then in a week or so, we're going to switch over to more of the 'help sleep' solutions. Right now, we're focusing on having a much much longer, consistent bedtime routine (right now ours is only about 15 minutes long), and also blacking out the room more, adding a fan, and cooling it down. We'll see if any of them make a difference! We've tried the white noise but it doesn't really seem to help, but I think the fan might be a different enough noise, plus is will keep the air in the room moving. And we've put up thicker fabric on the window already, but it doesn't cover the whole thing, and we really need to take it down and hem the edges and hang it properly. 

Also Carrie, that sounds fantastic about the birthday! We're already talking about that here, and what's going to happen. We have a small house, plus it'll be November, so no outside... if the basement is finished, it should be fine, but I doubt it will be by then! And I really don't want to have it at a family member's house, because then they start getting all fiesty about their food restrictions (ie not allowed to bring a cake with gluten into the house, even if only T is eating it...)  Also, I'd like to throw a big party with both sides at once, and get it over with, but they won't all fit. 

[akind1]

JJ: honestly, birthday parties have been for friends only for us for both of Gabe's birthdays so far. yeah, it's at my parents' house and they are here and help host. But even though ALL of DH's family is no more than 30-45 minute drive from us, they NEVER come to us. EVER. The most we get is DH's grandma comes to the hospital for the births. And she has parkinsons! (I say this to emphasize that she, of all people, makes the effort at important things, but no one else does. She also came to his 1st birthday).

November, in Canada . . . hmm. Can you all just meet at a restaurant? is it mostly grown ups? if kids are involved that changes things up.

DS's birthday is 11/20 - but we are in South Carolina and sometimes have beautiful weather. The first birthday was held nearly completely outside, with only food done inside. The second birthday it rained, so mostly inside, but it let up and we were able to do a little outside. Far less people came too. Oh well.

Our kids have as long a bedtime as it takes them to fall asleep. Sometimes it's 10 minutes, sometimes it's 2  hours. hard to predict. I hate that, but not so much that I feel like changing it. Both are so young too that I am sure whatever I do now, will need to be changed again soon, such is life.

Carrie - do it! I think it would be fun!

[MarineWife]

I'm all for doing parties at someone else's house as long as they don't try to control everything. The only thing I'd be worried about would be if they were really uptight or would get really upset if something in their house got messed up and then freak out at me about it.

I have used blackout curtains in my bedroom for years because I had such a hard time sleeping. I think it really helps with the kids, too. They woke up a lot earlier at my mom's house and a lot more morning sunlight came in through her curtains.

[onetwoten]

Originally Posted by akind1 

JJ: honestly, birthday parties have been for friends only for us for both of Gabe's birthdays so far. yeah, it's at my parents' house and they are here and help host. But even though ALL of DH's family is no more than 30-45 minute drive from us, they NEVER come to us. EVER. The most we get is DH's grandma comes to the hospital for the births. And she has parkinsons! (I say this to emphasize that she, of all people, makes the effort at important things, but no one else does. She also came to his 1st birthday).

November, in Canada . . . hmm. Can you all just meet at a restaurant? is it mostly grown ups? if kids are involved that changes things up.

Our kids have as long a bedtime as it takes them to fall asleep. Sometimes it's 10 minutes, sometimes it's 2  hours. hard to predict. I hate that, but not so much that I feel like changing it. Both are so young too that I am sure whatever I do now, will need to be changed again soon, such is life.

I don't think we'll have many 'friends' at the party, it'll likely be almost all family but everyone will come. On my side, it's all adults, about 10 of them, but on DH's side, there's 7 adults and 6 kids between the ages 1.5 and 8. And they're loud. I think we're past the point of typical restaurant. However... there is a very chill cafe type restaurant I just started going to with our AP group, that I'm wondering if they could host it. It's a total hippy place, with lots of space, and couches and chairs, but a full menu and they even have toys in the place throughout. Hmmmm... 

I just want a bit of a more structured bedtime routine so it helps to settle her down and remember that bedtime is coming, rather than *wham* go to sleep, out of nowhere, you know?

[Baby_Cakes]

Agreed about the uptightness/freaking out stuff.  Luckily I don't think that's even an issue as far as my ILs are concerned.  But it is definitely something to talk to them about beforehand, especially since I'm planning to invite people with kids and while we all do our best to watch our littles, they can easily break something or get into a flower bed you don't want them to!

JJ - yes, I hear you on the bedtime routine.  Ours here is pretty straightforward.  We dim all the lights and I begin to nurse Finn down while we watch a Blues Clues quietly.  Mostly that's for Nora.  For Finn, we probably started right around Ten's age, the 6 or so month mark, with getting him in his jammies, dimming the lights, putting away the toys (clean up, clean up....) and then nurse.  Nora's bedtime routine as a little was so much more difficult b/c she wouldn't wind down.  We did a bath in dim lights probably every night.  No TV, no lights.  I had to nurse her, and then stand and rock her (usually for 30 min to an hour) and then hope she'd stay asleep once I put her down.  If not, rinse, repeat.  It was exhausting!

I do have the NCSS book and some tips can really be helpful.  Just keep in mind that while environment and routine do help encourage sleep, nothing can make your baby sleep.  She has to do it on her own.  Our job is to create the perfect environment so they understand sleep is expected -- doesn't mean it's going to work.  I just don't want you to feel bad or like you aren't doing something right if you do all the tips/tricks and work yourself crazy trying to do something, and she still has trouble going down or staying asleep.  Just know that you are a wonderful, loving, and smart mama.  And that she WILL get there in time.

Ok - can I hijack for a temping/CTA question?  My cycle is wacky, go figure!  Still no sign of fertile cm and my temps are SO LOW.  Is that normal?  

Here is my chart...

What do you guys think?  I know I'm missing some temps...just rough nights that didn't seem to matter anyway...

[MarineWife]

Carrie ~ I don't know about the temps since you don't have anything to compare them to but the long periods without fertile CF while BFing is very normal. My cycles were inconsistent when they first came back before. With Kellen I had a PP bleed at about 6 months but then nothing for several months afterward. With Ethan I started having sort of regular PP bleeds with short cycles for 3 or 4 months before I actually Oed and then my cycles got less predictable.

I agree with Carrie on using the tips and tricks in NCSS. I can see how that book might be helpful if you need some ideas of things to try to help promote a sleeping environment but nothing is going to make a baby sleep until she's ready. Warm baths can help. Singing can help. Rocking or walking baby around can help. Nursing can help, obviously. With Dylan we have to have everything very dark and quiet for him to fall asleep at night most of the time. I find that strange since he'll fall asleep almost anywhere at any time with any amount of noise during the day. Kellen used to fall asleep at 9 O'clock almost every night so easily wherever he was. That was so amazing. I remember being shocked by that. Ethan would fall asleep early but he would wake often.

JJ ~ That's a lot of people for a restaurant. I can't imagine having that many people for a party. I think the most we've ever had was maybe 10 people total. Maybe you could reserve a banquet type room somewhere if that's what you want to do.

[akind1]

JJ: that's a lot of people! the cafe sounds promising. I wonder if there is a time they are not normally open, or less busy, they could close it for you? IDK how much that would cost though.

I should work on a bed time routine . . . I am too lazy.

[Baby_Cakes]

Originally Posted by MarineWife 

Carrie ~ I don't know about the temps since you don't have anything to compare them to but the long periods without fertile CF while BFing is very normal. My cycles were inconsistent when they first came back before. With Kellen I had a PP bleed at about 6 months but then nothing for several months afterward. With Ethan I started having sort of regular PP bleeds with short cycles for 3 or 4 months before I actually Oed and then my cycles got less predictable.

Good points! 

I guess I am just comparing to the temps pre pregnancy.  They were almost always in the 97s.  Seeing 96s just makes me think something is off -- well, it is, if you consider I'm still within the first year postpartum and mostly nursing.  It's not as tho I'm trying to conceive anyway, so I suppose it's nothing to be concerned about.

Kat - Why bother w/a bedtime routine if you don't need one??  If they go to bed easily then why bother?  

[akind1]

Well, depends on your definition of easily . . . Gabe will lay down with you at bedtime until he falls asleep. Sometimes he cries a bit, but he doesn't try to get out of bed, just fidgets. And sometimes you lay with him over an hour before he finally drifts off. Norah. man. she fights lately, fights HARD. last night I was ping pong boobing her, trying different positions, just letting her get some wriggles out . . . it took a long time. *sigh* I am hoping it's just a phase.

Carrie, I wouldn't be too worried about  your temps either. I can't even remember to temp. *ugh*

[AnnieA]

Baby_Cakes, are you "priming" your therm before turning it on? I would always  hold my therm in my cheek for about 30 secs before turning it on to temp because I keep it so cold in our house. Once I started doing that, I got much more stable temps. But yeah, you are still nursing a lot so your hormones are probably all over the place. I would expect a bit of chart craziness.

Birthday party locations: we are having DD's at my mom's house. Our immediate family barely fits in our house so there's no way we could host a birthday party. If most of mine and DH's family shows up, that will be 35-40 people. My mom's house is great for parties and she'll help with the cooking. My only thing is that I want it to be low-key and not have my mom in the kitchen the whole time. At my baby shower, most people didn't even know my mom was there because she was in the kitchen the whole time.

Sleep...ugh, still bad here. I think Ava has started another "wonder week". Have you guys heard about that? I was just reading about it last night. These growth spurts where they learn new skills and drive us all crazy in the process...wonder weeks.
 

[onetwoten]

Originally Posted by Baby_Cakes 

JJ - yes, I hear you on the bedtime routine.  Ours here is pretty straightforward.  We dim all the lights and I begin to nurse Finn down while we watch a Blues Clues quietly.  Mostly that's for Nora.  For Finn, we probably started right around Ten's age, the 6 or so month mark, with getting him in his jammies, dimming the lights, putting away the toys (clean up, clean up....) and then nurse.  Nora's bedtime routine as a little was so much more difficult b/c she wouldn't wind down.  We did a bath in dim lights probably every night.  No TV, no lights.  I had to nurse her, and then stand and rock her (usually for 30 min to an hour) and then hope she'd stay asleep once I put her down.  If not, rinse, repeat.  It was exhausting!

I do have the NCSS book and some tips can really be helpful.  Just keep in mind that while environment and routine do help encourage sleep, nothing can make your baby sleep.  She has to do it on her own.  Our job is to create the perfect environment so they understand sleep is expected -- doesn't mean it's going to work.  I just don't want you to feel bad or like you aren't doing something right if you do all the tips/tricks and work yourself crazy trying to do something, and she still has trouble going down or staying asleep.  Just know that you are a wonderful, loving, and smart mama.  And that she WILL get there in time.

Sorry, I'm no help at the CTA postpartum. I need to get out my book and read it again. I never really read that part before... Hoping I won't have to for awhile! :/

Yeah, we're planning on starting at 7, and doing a bath, and then massage if she's letting us, diaper and jammies, read a few books, and then nursing and rocking until she falls asleep. I'm ok with it taking a while for her to fall asleep, but like Kat said- I don't like the crazy abrobatics, trying to get out of my arms when it's time for bed. Some nights she'll calm right down, and it's great, but others we get into the room and she just wants to play play play. But if I decide to keep her up, then she has a meltdown. So I'm hoping the routine will help cue her that it's time to wind down and get ready to sleep. After we're nursing quietly, I'm ok with it taking a while for her to actually go to sleep- I've always got a book or the ipod, so I'll stay in there for half hour or so.  I'm also helping more of a wind down will help her wakeups in the first 90 minutes. She's getting better, but in general, we get her down to sleep, put her down, and then she wakes every 20-30 minutes, absolutely shrieking, and we have to go in and resettle her. So I'm hoping if she's more relaxed before she hits sleep, maybe it'll help? Worth a shot!!

But I totally get what you mean about not expecting it to just work -point blank-. I figure I'll go through the suggestions in the book that seem to me like they could be having an effect on her sleep, and if they help, then fantastic. If they don't, then I know it's just her body, her stage, etc etc. But at least then I'll know there's nothing that --we're-- doing that is resulting in her disjointed sleep, does that make sense? Because right now there's a few of the things that I'm like yeah... I can see how us doing X, is resulting in her waking up so frequently. 

She's had a few small stretches lately of 2+ hours, so it makes me think she's working her way towards better sleep, just little by little. So I just want to help her along gently how we can. 

Originally Posted by akind1 

JJ: that's a lot of people! the cafe sounds promising. I wonder if there is a time they are not normally open, or less busy, they could close it for you? IDK how much that would cost though.

I should work on a bed time routine . . . I am too lazy.

It is! Usually it's just held at a family members house, but I'm not crazy about that- especially since I want both sides of the family to come and get it all done at once! lol  From what I know about this place, they wouldn't charge us for 'rental', but we would be expected to order food (but omg is it to die for!), which I'm on the fence about, because it is on the expensive side for the soups/sandwiches/pizza type fare they serve. SIL had held a birthday party at a restaurant before, and we all ordered and paid for our own food, but I don't know if she would like this choice... so I don't know. 

It all comes down to my SIL with her four "gluten intolerant" children. Did I mention that she admitted to my other SIL recently that she's pretty sure 2/4 aren't actually intolerant, but she's making them stick to the restrictions because she doesn't think it's fair to their siblings?!?!  Anyways, she's very picky about only having gluten free food served around her children. She's the president of her montessori, and they did a fundraiser night-- yup, made the entire menu gluten free, just for them. Apparently there wasn't anyone else there that needed gluten free.  I have no problem serving or ensuring there are gluten free items for them, but it doesn't seem fair that I wouldn't be able to serve the foods I wanted at a party (alongside ones they could have) because they aren't allowed to have them. 

Originally Posted by akind1 

Well, depends on your definition of easily . . . Gabe will lay down with you at bedtime until he falls asleep. Sometimes he cries a bit, but he doesn't try to get out of bed, just fidgets. And sometimes you lay with him over an hour before he finally drifts off. Norah. man. she fights lately, fights HARD. last night I was ping pong boobing her, trying different positions, just letting her get some wriggles out . . . it took a long time. *sigh* I am hoping it's just a phase.

Carrie, I wouldn't be too worried about  your temps either. I can't even remember to temp. *ugh*

[onetwoten]

Originally Posted by AnnieA 

Baby_Cakes, are you "priming" your therm before turning it on? I would always  hold my therm in my cheek for about 30 secs before turning it on to temp because I keep it so cold in our house. Once I started doing that, I got much more stable temps. But yeah, you are still nursing a lot so your hormones are probably all over the place. I would expect a bit of chart craziness.

Birthday party locations: we are having DD's at my mom's house. Our immediate family barely fits in our house so there's no way we could host a birthday party. If most of mine and DH's family shows up, that will be 35-40 people. My mom's house is great for parties and she'll help with the cooking. My only thing is that I want it to be low-key and not have my mom in the kitchen the whole time. At my baby shower, most people didn't even know my mom was there because she was in the kitchen the whole time.

Sleep...ugh, still bad here. I think Ava has started another "wonder week". Have you guys heard about that? I was just reading about it last night. These growth spurts where they learn new skills and drive us all crazy in the process...wonder weeks.
 

Oh, that makes so much sense about priming the therm!

And hey, at least Wonder Week makes it sounds exciting! I'll take any perspective I can get at 3am!  How is she other than sleep? Has the breathing calmed down? I don't remember hearing an update about that, but I might have missed it. 

[MarineWife]

JJ ~ That's ridiculous! Sounds to me like your SIL is being self-centered. I would not put up with that to the point that I wouldn't even invite her to the party if she acted like that (but I can be nasty that way ).

[AnnieA]

Originally Posted by jeninejessica 

Oh, that makes so much sense about priming the therm!

And hey, at least Wonder Week makes it sounds exciting! I'll take any perspective I can get at 3am!  How is she other than sleep? Has the breathing calmed down? I don't remember hearing an update about that, but I might have missed it. 

She's still breathing rapidly at times. But her ECHO showed excellent heart function and her chest xray was clear. I am going to call the nurse tomorrow and have her check with her pedi to see if he just wants to talk about this at her 12 month WBV or if we should come in before then. There has to be a reason why she's breathing fast some times and then not at others. Just so strange. She's teething SO bad, even drooling which she has never done before and she's generally just a whiny, drooling, mess. Good thing she's cute!