can i pick your brain? DH and I planned to adopt even befpore we got engaged. in 2005 we were all set to start an IA adoption of a SN girl from India -- before we signed offically I got preggo with #1. after that we decided to have #2 biologically soon so that they'd be close together. #2 was boon in 2007. in 2008 we filled out application, did finger prints and got accepted by Iowa to start faster parent traning. we enrolled in a class but did not start; the month of the classes we were finally approved to go on the "waiting to move list" at DH's job. we did not think there would be time to get a placement, and a TPR and an adoption and we did not want to disrupt.
fast forward to NOW -- we are moving, yes, just now, in Aug or Nov but WILL BE moved by Thanksgiving no matter what.
I have contacted the county in MO where we will live and we can not even fill out the application to be a foster to adopt family till we move. i get that, it is frustrating but i get that THAT is the rule.
so we are still chomping at the bit to adopt. however we want to adopt a girl. i am 40 and dh is 46 this will be our last child and we are selfish we want a girl and the boys want a sister. we would "like" a 18 month to 3 year old girl. of curse we'd not refuse a girl younger. we are open to maybe a set of 2 girls, or a boy and a girl -- both born after 2008.
we are torn on foster to adopt or IA. frankly in 05 IA made perfect sense and in 08 foster to adopt did -- now i am not sure about 13 ............
so -- can you suggest anything for me (us) to read to help us make the choice? how do we make that choice?
We are just tonr on how to know what to do -- what path fits best -- all i see are the challnages on both sides -- help me see some light