Well, I had really thought that the power of positive thinking would bring our baby a bit early. I've not even thought at all in terms of a due date but rather a due week. Well, now that week is over (and I'm 2 days past the official "date"). DD was 5 days after her due date, but she wasn't positioned optimally either, so I had hoped that between working on positioning and this being baby #2, I'd have the baby a bit sooner. Since I expected the baby this week, we have had a really open schedule. DH hasn't been working much and we've been really enjoying a relaxed family life. It's wonderful.
But here is my question...
There is a workshop next weekend that DH really wants to go to. The person teaching it is not often in the US (he is from Israel) and he will be just 3.5 hours away. I really want DH to go. He is so burned out with work and the pressures of providing for the family by himself. This would be a chance for him to get re-inspired and reconnected with his purpose. I found out about the class over a week ago and when I mentioned it to him, he just figured he couldn't go with the baby. But back then I thought the baby was only a few days away from arriving (lots of pre-labor signs) and I really encouraged him to consider it. So he let himself open to the idea and got really excited.
But now, here we are a week later and no baby yet. I'm planning to lay-in with the baby for at least 9 days (I did 3 weeks with DD, but I don't think that will be possible this time around). Certainly the baby will be here in the next week, but it means that I will still be in laying-in mode and need lots of help. My parents are close and were already scheduled to help out a lot, but I'm not sure that they are willing to do 3 days of 24 hour care for us.
I can probably find some other help (maybe our doula can come on the weekend, I can ask), but now I'm wondering if it is a bad idea to have him go away. I have forgotten about the hormonal shifts that come right after baby is born. While I feel right now that it would be ok, on the other side of birth I might be an emotional mess. Not that DH is very helpful there. As someone with asperger syndrom, any emotional roller coaster is extremely stressful for him and it just short circuits his brain. So, I'm not expecting a lot of emotional support anyway but just having him here would help with practical stuff and having things as stable as possible. Also, he really only has until the end of June before he has to step back into work more full time. So this weekend would cut into that time together. And, although the workshop itself will probably be great, the trip will be energetically taxing for him (both the drive and being around a lot of people for three days) and he will probably come home tired and needing space to himself.
I just hate to have him miss this opportunity. Plus, I am hoping that by getting that personal and spiritual time, he will have more emotional resiliency for dealing with the new baby family life. I've been so sad to see him burned out and uninspired. I want to help him find his spark again.
So, what do you all think? Should I tell him to stay home now? Or should I still encourage him to go? Am I thinking through this clearly????