Boob-obsessed toddler!

[cyanotype]

I'm hoping some other mamas out there might have some advice for me, or at least been in a similar situation. I have a 17 month old, and she has been co-sleeping since she was born. She has always been fairly high-needs at night (ie. I haven't had a good sleep in 17 months) but we have coped with the sleep deprivation and frequent nursing fairly well, until this point. She had, about six weeks ago, started to sleep for longer stretches at night (only waking 2 or 3 times), and also started to be able to be comforted by my husband rather than me when she woke up. For the past couple weeks, though, she has been COMPLETELY obsessed with my breasts, to the point that it actually seems to be preventing her from sleeping!

We try to comfort her by singing to her/petting her until at least midnight (we're trying to night-wean her very gently) but once I fall asleep, she has to be either playing with my nipple (squeezing HARD!) or nursing CONSTANTLY  - and I really mean constantly, she'll be on there for hours with no breaks, and will freak out if I try to unlatch her. When I do succeed in unlatching her, she has to have my breast in her hand for a few minutes, will drift off and roll over to her dad for about 30 seconds, but then will start to thrash, wake up, and move back to the boob again. This repeats all night. Its like she's so focused on my boobs that she can't sleep! Has anyone else encountered anything like this? I am admittedly writing out of sheer desperation - I'm utterly exhausted in the morning, and so is she!

On a side note, she seems to have grown more interested in my breasts during the day as well, always putting her hand down my shirt when I'm holding her and trying to pull them out... I know that becoming fixated on boobies is common but I never thought it would be so extreme at night!

[Asiago]

Originally Posted by cyanotype 

 She has always been fairly high-needs at night (ie. I haven't had a good sleep in 17 months) but we have coped with the sleep deprivation and frequent nursing fairly well, until this point.....

.......We try to comfort her by singing to her/petting her until at least midnight (we're trying to night-wean her very gently) 

Any chance you could try again to night wean in a few months? It sounds like she is not ready.

It also sounded easier before the nightweaning, more hormonious. 

She may need you a lot right now, and the timing may be off to night wean (molars, etc.).

[Mama4life14]

I totally know what you're going through. Circumstances made me wean my son when he was 21 months. He adjusted extremely well. But after about a month he started to just put his hand down my shirt for comfort. I didn't really mind it, I wanted to have a way to comfort him like I could with breastfeeding. Then it got to the point that you are describing. He couldn't fall asleep without touching my boobs! I thought "here we go! I'll eventually have to wean him from this too!" Its been about 9 months since he started it, and he still loves it. But about 3 months ago, I started to tell him to hold my hand instead. Sometimes he wouldn't have it but half the time he would do it with no fuss. Now he will ask to hold my hand.. After of course he playfully tries to stick his hand down my shirt! Thinking its a big joke now.

Your daughter is younger than my son, so telling her to hold your hand instead might not work the same way, but its worth a try! Just know you're not the only one!

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[anjsmama]

My 17 month old DD is going through the same thing. We've decided to hold off on nightweaning. 15-18 months is a really peak point for seperation anxiety, and she literally seems to be holding on to my breasts for dear life! Like she doesn't know they'll be back if she lets go! Haha. It is annoying, for certain, but I just keep telling myself this too will pass. My DS was this age a blinking-eye ago and he's almost 4 now, and has been sleeping in his own bed through the night for 2 years. My DD has also become more breast-obsessed during the day... nursing more, playing with my breasts more, and seemingly eating less. I'm not exactly sure what it's about - emotional, teeth, or what-not, but I'm pretty certain it's a developmental thing. 

Also, any chance you can teach your DD to sleep on her belly? After an hour of being latched, I lose my wits, and have to unlatch her even if she doesn't want it. I roll over to my belly, and roll her to her belly, and rub her back til she falls back asleep. When she wakes again a few hours later, I allow her to nurse/cuddle my breasts again but again, I eventually unlatch. I just don't have it in me to sleep latched like that anymore. My DD is less wakeful (looking for my breasts!) when she's on her tummy and she's old enough now to manage it just fine.