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Mothering › Groups › February 2013 Due Date Club › Discussions › A bucket list for this pregnancy -especially if you think it is your last - what is on it?

A bucket list for this pregnancy -especially if you think it is your last - what is on it?

post #1 of 22
Thread Starter 

On a lighter note... for those of us that think this is our last pregnancy - (Im pondering nudging hubbie into a snip if this all goes well..)

What are some things you want to make sure you do this pregnancy that you may not have done before or want to make sure you go again?

 

Ill start:

  • Eat famous red velvet pancakes (I did this..we went downtown detroit.. a rarity around here to go down) and ZOMG
  • Take pictures of my tummy - never did this before - at a size 22/24 -well its its awkward but I think Imma do it--etsy stickers and all
  • Plan for a true babymoon of some sort - it will be hard because baby will do smack dab in middle of school year but I want this baby to be about family and connecting together
  • After first trimester - put some true purple back in my hair.  I used to have purple dreads but then I "grew up".  I think for at least the next year, I will be staying home (first time ever being home with my own baby vs a nanny or daycare ) so my hair can slide a little

 

Anyone else?

post #2 of 22

Nice thread!

 

It wont be my last, but it's my second, so I feel I have things I want to do now that i know what to expect

 

I am on a grooming kick...its like a compulsion, I know once I have the baby, things like eyebrow plucking and tending to my feet are a luxury so I have been doing alot of that and plan to get in some pedicures and hair cuts

 

I also want to give my son lots and lots of mommy time, I wont be able to give to him as much after, so building a good bond and good memories right now is important

 

Overcoming the fear of birth is a big one, i am terrified to be in a hospital again and will do anything to have a VBAC 

post #3 of 22

This will likely be my last pregnancy (#3)

 

Take naked belly pictures. Last time I did ones with clothes on, this time, I want to be braver.

 

Get professional maternity portraits done. Thankfully I know someone fantastic :)

 

Grooming - yeah - I've cut my hair all short, which means more frequent cuts but less day -to- day stuff.

 

Baby Girl is only 8 months old and Big Brother is 2.5, so I do want to focus alot on them.

 

I would love to stay at home after this one is born, but we need to win the lottery or something. thankfully I can WAH most days.

 

@ Canadian Hippie - I had a VBAC with #2 and it is so worth it to fight for it. One of the best things I did was hire a private doula with VBAC experience (both personal and professional) she helped me navigate the prenatal fears and have the courage to stand up for my own rights. Another was regular chiro visits, which I need to resume, I think they really helped me and baby be in a better position at birth.

post #4 of 22

I also had a VBAC with #2 and a doula was so helpful in achieving this.

 

The only thing I can think of is belly pics. I don't have any from my other pregnancies!

post #5 of 22
This is our last so I want to make an extra effort to:
Have a family getaway this summer and then again at Xmas time.
Get to prenatal yoga as much as possible. I did this w my first pregnancy and it really helped and was so bonding.
Get professional photos done in nature. Always wanted a shoot like this.
post #6 of 22

I'm going to spoil myself with some nice maternity wear. :) I don't mean expensive, I just mean flattering. I've always had the triple problem of a) being on a budget and b) not really showing until 6 months or later and needing size Small, which is hard to find in thrift stores and c) passing on my clothes after every pregnancy because we were always "done." I am sure I won't need anything bigger than my usual clothes until 16 weeks or so, but I plan to find/make some nice flattering clothes that will show off my belly rather than hide it. I just found the site DIYmaternity, so if i have time to sew, that's my plan, and rather than just going up a size in normal clothes for my second trimester, I'm going to wear real belly-obvious clothes. And, only in the colors that flatter me!!! 

 

I was so envious this past winter when I saw a young-ish woman downtown dressed nicely in a maternity pea coat, and I thought, "That's not fair! I never got to dress nicely, I would never waste money on something like that which would only be worn for 2-3 months...." and after my stupid pity party I realized that I'm not a workin' gal/fashion gal and my choice to stay home with my children, live on a frugal budget, and make some of our own clothes is soooooo much better than being able to wear a maternity pea coat because I work in an office and have the extra bucks. I'm so silly.

 

 

I have beautiful sets of photos from my 3rd and 4th pregnancies because I regretted not doing it w/ my 1st and 2nd, so I definitely encourage you ladies to do the photos, nudes can be so tastefully done too! I won't bother this time around.

post #7 of 22

Love this thread!!!  This will be our last as well and i really want to have super cute maternity pics done, we did a home made version with my last but we all know its not the same =))

I want to have a water birth!!!! We didn't have time to fill up the pool with my last cause everything went so fast, the day after i was already planning the next birth lol.

I want to take a little vacay, take the kids up to the beach =)

I want to find a super nice and sweet doula. We don't have any family around and the help and support is super appreciated .

I'm sure more will come up along the way...

post #8 of 22

@Michelle Renee, I do purple and black in my hair sometimes too - I usually just do the Manic Panic stuff though. 

post #9 of 22
Professional maternity photos, professional infant photos, birth announcements, and actually hand make some stuff for these babes.

I really want to knit stocking hats (because newborns look adorable in them) and DH is going to hand craft a crib (or two).
post #10 of 22

This may be our last, i'm going back and forth on that.. but either way.

 

-would it be wrong to put on this list that I want to have a birth without my mother in law there? (she has been at all of my births) and i just don't feel that great about it now..

-i'm seriously considering all the professional photos, birth and newborn - possibly maternity and infant.. 

- a water birth, or at least water labor, last time it didn't appeal to me at all, this time it does.

post #11 of 22

I am pretty sure (or DH is Positive) this is our last....

 

I want to have birth photos taken.... not by DH and not by a MW (we got a few of DD2 crowning by MW on her phone....) I want some really nice photos, and maybe even a video.  It was supposed to happen with DD2, but things went very fast at the end and we didn't have time.

 

I want to try and enjoy the pregnancy a little more.  I was so concerned about not gaining a ton of weight that I just didn't enjoy it as much.

post #12 of 22

Ooh, yeah I want to get video of the birth this time.  I have nothing from the first one and 2 or 3 pics my mom took at the second.  

 

A friend of mine is a photographer so I am planning to talk to her about doing some actual professional looking pics this time around (for the belly, not the birth).  

 

I'd like to get more light exercise done this time (walking etc.) just to try and keep my hips from being totally out of whack.  

 

And I'm growing my hair out (from cutting off failed dreads) so I want to try to keep it styled or do fun things with it so I don't feel like I'm looking odd in the weird in-between hair styles phase.

post #13 of 22

Ya'll are making me want birth photos! My doula also is a birth photographer, maybe . . . we will see. Last time (my only vaginal birth) I was naked at the end, and I don't really want pics of that.

post #14 of 22

odinsmama - i was just trying to imagine "professional" birth pictures...every well-lit, hi def inch of them. thanks for clarifying. ;)

 

  • VBAC!!!
  • i was a toughie last pregnancy - insisted on doing everything i did before, not being a "baby", not asking for much. i wanted pregnancy to be not that big of deal. but, it is SUPER AMAZING to be growing a baby and i was silly not to ask for/accept help last time.
  • plan better/not procrastinate: DD was born at 35 weeks and we hadn't done a lot of the important stuff. we weren't ready for her to come yet - our midwife advised us to expect 41-42 weeks of pregnancy so we thought we had 6 more weeks!
  • line up some donor milk before the birth: after DD's birth (and my milk never came in) i was diagnosed with a breast deformity (http://www.llli.org/llleaderweb/lv/lviss2-3-2009p4.html). we had a supplement her with formula from the very beginning. i'm hoping this time we can get some donors BEFORE the birth so we have enough milk on hand after the birth.
  • i'm considering no stay-over visitors: my mom and stepmom both stayed with us for 2-3 weeks after DD was born. it was nice to have the help, but maybe only for a week at the beginning. (but, we didn't have a toddle then, so maybe i'm being crazy!)

 

that's all i have! like margarita, i'm also on a tight budget. so, no haircuts or new clothes for me! we were DINKs (dual income, no kids) for my first pregnancy, so i have plenty of nicer maternity clothes and i kept them all. i'm too cheap to buy that all again! ;)

post #15 of 22
Quote:
Originally Posted by whoabethy View Post

odinsmama - i was just trying to imagine "professional" birth pictures...every well-lit, hi def inch of them. thanks for clarifying. ;)

 

  • line up some donor milk before the birth: after DD's birth (and my milk never came in) i was diagnosed with a breast deformity (http://www.llli.org/llleaderweb/lv/lviss2-3-2009p4.html). we had a supplement her with formula from the very beginning. i'm hoping this time we can get some donors BEFORE the birth so we have enough milk on hand after the birth.

 

Ha!  That would be hilarious... get my hair done when I go into labor, maybe some makeup, good lighting (maybe plan it for sunset?) and a flowing white gown for the professional birth photos!  :-p

 

Good luck getting donor milk together!  

Are you a part of an LLL group?  The group is not allowed to promote donor milk or even be a "middle man" for you and a donor, but I bet you could meet some mamas who'd be willing to pump some extra for you.

post #16 of 22

What I meant to say is that LLL can't promote private party donor milk without blood tests and such being done, but of course they endorse donor milk.

post #17 of 22
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by odinsmama View Post

What I meant to say is that LLL can't promote private party donor milk without blood tests and such being done, but of course they endorse donor milk.

 



They can't do this officially by any means but if you are friends with a LLL leader- they for sure have been known to pass on information to other friends, etc.  My second daughter was EBF via donors until she was 14 months old.  It was beautiful, touching, and heart breaking (in a good way that so many people stepped up and for me because I could not do it due to IGT).

 

Once I am past the point of viability I will start the hunt for milk for my next child.   Ophelia (my second daughter) was so incredibly blessed between here, LLL, milkshare, and word of mouth.

post #18 of 22
Quote:
Originally Posted by Michelle Renee View Post

 



They can't do this officially by any means but if you are friends with a LLL leader- they for sure have been known to pass on information to other friends, etc.  My second daughter was EBF via donors until she was 14 months old.  It was beautiful, touching, and heart breaking (in a good way that so many people stepped up and for me because I could not do it due to IGT).

 

Once I am past the point of viability I will start the hunt for milk for my next child.   Ophelia (my second daughter) was so incredibly blessed between here, LLL, milkshare, and word of mouth.

This is great!!  

Yes, I'm actually a LLL leader myself and the only thing I'm "officially" allowed to do is inform moms of the risks, talk to potential donors about having some kind of liability form and letting them know it's ultimately up to them to decide what to do.

But, yes, as a friend of someone in the group I would "take off my LLL hat" and let them know that I know of someone who has lots in her freezer.  This conversation can't even take place at a meeting, but can happen after the meeting or any other time.

 

All that to say, if you can hook up with an LLL group, you're bound to meet moms who are willing to share, whoabethy.

post #19 of 22

odinsmama - i never went to a LLL meeting with DD. i felt SO BAD about myself for not being able to EBF i hardly left the house for the first 3 months PP. i was planning a homebirth, ended up with a c-section. planned to EBF, ended up using an SNS, pumping around the clock, taking every supplement know to woman until DD was about 11mo. building and maintaining my supply was like a part time job! ;)  i saw an IBCLC and a lactation physician.  i also got a lot of donations on milkshare, but i only found milkshare when DD was about 4 months. i think this time I will definitely go to LLL meetings. if only just to share with other moms my journey! (and i DO know a lot about lactation now!) but, i'm know there are plenty of mamas who will be happy to share. we were so grateful to the mamas who helped us with DD!

 

Michelle Renee - it's great to hear that EBF via donors is possible! i'd love to hear more about how you found so many generous mamas to help out!
 

post #20 of 22

I hope this won't be our last. 

 

That said, I'm looking forward to my first home birth.

I'm looking forward to birthing solely in my own language again (that hasn't happened since #2, as I birthed #3 in Thailand and #s 4 & 5 in Turkey).

Every single time I'm pregnant, I try to remember that it could be the last time... things happen and life changes... so I try to indulge myself and deeply imprint memories in those moments when the baby is moving (before birth), when I'm birthing the baby (in labor), and when the baby is new, so that I will remember those precious times. 

Besides that, not much else.  I am looking forward to resting as much as I need it once the baby is born... not having to deal with hospital staff, make sure they don't do things we haven't consented to, wait to be "released" to take my own baby home, etc.  I'm just really excited about being able to meet and enjoy our sweet little one in the privacy of our own home.

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