So, DS2 is now 3 weeks old, but my question is about DD who is 2 1/2. I feel like she's having a pretty hard time adjusting to the new baby/new family dynamic. She likes him a lot, and that's great, but she's been really defiant with me, and just having all kinds of behavior issues that we never had before. She has challenges with bed time, and she's been waking up really "hard"- just really upset when she wakes (especially from naps- to the point where I'd rather that she doesn't nap), where she'll cry sometimes for several minutes and be really difficult to console, etc.
Another thing that she does that's been getting really hard to deal with (and I could really use some advice on!) is that when I'm nursing the baby (which of course, is pretty much all the time), she wants to come up and hover around me/him. She'll prop herself up on the nursing pillow and lean over and kiss him several times (which is cute at first, but then I tell her that's enough and she gets upset). I try to tell her gently, but she doesn't listen and then it escalates. Or she leans on my legs, but her elbows dig into me and it hurts, and I try to explain, but she just keeps doing it. It's been going on for a while, and I just feel like I'm losing my patience with her. I want to include her, but part of me has that "touched out" feeling after a while, part of me just wants her to quit messing with the baby, since it's distracting as he's trying to get/stay latched on, and it makes me feel overwhelmed which I'm sure he can sense.
I guess there's always some new issue to deal with the more children you have, DS1 had issues when DD was the new baby, but not like this. He was rough w/DD (even though he was trying to help) and she got hurt a lot by him- thankfully that's not the issue this time around...
Anyway, can anyone relate? Any tips on how to gently redirect her without hurting her feelings?