It's an interesting thing, I know.
As noted in other posts I've listed here, I'm not 100% keen on his dad in general, but whatever.. it's his father. And right now, when I pick up my son from school, he wants to see his dad. He wants to know his dad. I will not stand in the way of that.
So when he picks him up here at home, if he needs stuff... I want to make sure he has FOOD (omg!) and diapers/wipes. I've just always done that.
I'm NOT happy about the gas to pick him up... this is a new thing.
Now it's become... if you want him to see me... either you have to bring him here, or you have to give me gas money.
Which in my busy life (I am self-employed and rather successful), I'm happy to give him gas money... so I don't have to drive 20miles out in to the boonies. In THAT light, yeah, I'll foot the bill. Because it's MY decision. But when it's you not having gas to get him home to your house... shouldn't he have that?
But this girlfriend of mine who lived in Nevada, and maybe Nevada is different, who called me on my attitude.... she said I HAVE to provide everything. Full on diaper bag (maybe not gas/food, sure), but at least changes of clothes, diapers/wipes, even if he isn't paying, but just because I'm the primary care-giver, and this time with dad is... well, Rare. And she totally chastized me for having an attitude about it.
We are talking two different things...
Diaper Bag - she feels I have to provide clothes/diapers/wipes
Transportation - I haven't asked, but I'm assuming even she'd say that's not a stipulation
Either way, I hear you that I have to record everything I give him, period.
Today I gave him $8 for gas, because he literally "coasted in" to my driveway.
To me, $8 is nothing. I'm not a bank and I don't make THAT much money, and I remember when I didn't have that to spend. I've been there. I don't fault him for being broke. But that's what he asked for in gas and I gave him just that... so he could get our son back to his house, and to bring him back tomorrow. $8 that he didn't have.
I need to record this. All of it. Every pack of wipes. Every... everything.
That's what I'm hearing right? Don't stop doing it -- cause I've done that, and I'm not joking, our son has come back with a t-shirt around his butt.
I will never STOP doing it, but it's that I don't HAVE to; and that I should record it.
Edited by JordanKX - 6/30/12 at 7:59pm