Maggie i think what you said is very insightful and it actually applies to a lot of things.
I have had 2 homebirths and my main motivators were a real fear of being out of control in a hospital environment and being forced to have interventions i didn't want. All my friends know my choices and my reasoning and all but one of them ended up with a disappointing/traumatic first birth because though they understood, theoretically, why i did what i did, they didn't REALLY get what i was on about until they had hindsight. They all knew the basic facts about birth and i'd told them that if you go somewhere where there's a 60% cs rate you're more likely to get a cs than not, but they didn't "get" what i meant, truly, until they were post cs and looking over notes on a fairly normal labour disrupted by interventions. So even giving people information, doesn't necessarily they will KNOW afterwards.
I think a lot of decisions we make can be that way. I had a thyroid problem after i'd had DD1 and in order to make sure she "had enough milk" i ended up topping up with formula (because my supply was dropping and she was hungry). Of course within a few weeks she was weaned because she began to refuse the breast and my supply totally bombed. But i thought the "don't mix feeds unless you're willing to wean completely" advice didn't apply to ME, someone who had BFed for 4 months already - i thought it only applied to women with newborns struggling to get a good latch! I look back and know that though my thyroid problem was at the root of my supply issues i COULD have avoided weaning if i'd fed fed fed and never offered alternative milks and pumped and taken herbs and so on. I know now, having pumped for a friend and managed to increase by 9oz/day on herbs and pumping, having BFed #2 for 2 years, what is possible. Back then i just. didn't. know. And being told unfortunately didn't really change that.