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July 2012 Rockstar Mamas - Page 2

post #21 of 293

Yeah, see we've got years and years before we outgrow this house. But we'll grow bored of it long before then. The family before us (that I nannyed for, so i spent time here with them as a family, and saw how the house was used) has three children, and even then, to me it just felt cozy, not totally cramped yet.  But it really is only a 3 bedroom, and the room that is currently Tenleys is pretty tiny. She could share it with a sibling, but only because once we're finished renos there will be a playroom downstairs. It's too tiny for anything more than sleeping if you put two people in there. The only other room is in the basement. I don't want to put kids down their alone until they're quite a bit older. 

 

I used to LOVE the idea of two stories, but I think it was mostly because we never had one, and to me, they seemed like the 'rich thing'. Now, I really couldn't care less as long as the other points are there!

post #22 of 293

Oh man we were too big for our current house before we even moved in! orngbiggrin.gif But buying/moving somewhere else isn't in the cards right now. So we'll make do.

 

Had to take DD to the pedi this morning. When she woke up Sat morning after seeing the opthamologist on Friday, the inside corner of her left eye was bright red. He dilated her eyes but when I called, they said the drops should not have made her eye red. It's gotten worse, not better so took her in this morning. Pedi says conjunctivitis. irked.gif So got the drops. Hopefully it will clear up soon. I had been doing BM since Sat but it wasn't really helping.
 

post #23 of 293
Thread Starter 
We've outgrown our house but only because we have so many toys. We have two playrooms, one upstairs and one downstairs, that are both full of toys. Sean keeps saying he's going to go through everything and get rid of stuff that's broken but he still hasn't done it. I go through periodically and fill up a grocery bag or small box with broken toys but it doesn't make a dent. But if we needed to, we could convert the playroom upstairs into another bedroom and have plenty.

I'm worried about what we'll do when we have to move. If Ryan comes with us, we'll need at least 4 bedrooms. Ethan really needs his own room. Kellen and Dylan could share a room. I don't know if we'll be able to afford anything that big where we're going.

No big plans today. Sean is out getting a new grill. I doubt we'll go see fireworks. I don't like the crowds.
post #24 of 293
I feel ok, a little nausea, but nothing major. Started feeling bubbles tonight. I tell you, honestly, I love being pregnant. I am treasuring it since its my last. Ultrasound is a week from tomorrow, so the 12th. If I am right, I think I am a little over 8 weeks, as that is the time I felt we were playing with fire a bit.

We could happily be in my parents basement a while, space wise. Hope we don't have to be, though.

It's so hard not telling my mom. I want to wait until after the ultrasound though.
post #25 of 293

I was looking at pics of my belly from this time last year and I miss it so much! I want to experience another pregnancy! Glad I can live vicariously through you right now akind1!
 

post #26 of 293
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by akind1 View Post

I tell you, honestly, I love being pregnant. I am treasuring it since its my last.

love.gif I loved being pg, too. It's such an amazing thing.
Quote:
Originally Posted by AnnieA View Post

I was looking at pics of my belly from this time last year and I miss it so much! I want to experience another pregnancy! Glad I can live vicariously through you right now akind1!

I said to Sean that this time last year I was waiting to have a baby. That got me a little sad since it will not happen again. greensad.gif
post #27 of 293

Yes, it is crazy how the little things add up to OMG I NEEDS ANOTHER PREGNANCY/BIRTH/BABY !!  We dropped Tenley's crib mattress last night, because she keeps pulling herself up in the middle of the night. It's CRAZY! I still feel like she should be this tiny little newborn, and here she is, big enough to pull herself up and topple out of her crib, should she so wish. 

 

It's weird. I can't say that I -miss- the newborn stage, so much as I mourn it, We go out with our parenting groups, and I see other mamas with newborns, and everytime, all I can think is "Tenley never did that..." Like at the beach- two mamas had newborns, that were so content to lay in a diaper on the blanket, and stare up at people, or snuggle into someone's arms. I want -that-. I think if I'm honest, I feel a little resentful that I never got to experience those peaceful blissful moments. We talked about newborn portraits too, and how we wished we had gotten some professionally done-- but I can't think of a time when she was settled enough to have done them. It's sad. And don't get me wrong- I love her. To pieces. I love the baby we have, I love how inquisitive she is, and how expressive, and always wanting to explore something new. I love how social she is, and how she cuddles in when I pick her up in the night. I just mourn that peaceful newborn stage we never got. :(

 

So yessssss!! Living vicariously Kat!!

 

 

Back to the house-- I think most people would say one more kid and we'd outgrow this house too, but meh. I've always lived in cozy houses. And I'd rather keep my current mortgage! lol Moving anytime in the next 5 years would absolutely mean I would need to go back to work fulltime. I'd rather be cramped. 

post #28 of 293
Thread Starter 
That reminds me...Annie ~ I didn't really understand what you were talking about with Ava's crib. How is it set up now and how would that change?

Also, I've been meaning to ask you, what was up with the HIV thing when she was born?! I don't recall you mentioning that before. Did you ever get an explanation about that?
post #29 of 293
Right now her crib is sidecarred on my side of the bed with her mattress at the same height as my mattress. I was considering dropping the mattress down to the lower level and putting the fourth side back on so she can safely explore her bed. She LOVES her bed. But I want to be able to just pull her over and snuggle. So I don't want to do it. But I feel a bit like I'm being selfish. But she likes to climb around on our bed too. IDK.
post #30 of 293
The rapid HIV test she was given when she first arrived at the other hospital was a false positive but they would not stop giving her AZT until the slow test, the Western blot, came back negative for both strains. Even though my rapid test was negative and the rapid tests have a higher false positive rate in newborns. It is one of those things that are done in hospitals and no one ever talks about it. Whenever I've told that story to medical types, they are always just like, yeah either the mom or the baby gets tested after birth if the HIV status is unknown. Since you weren't there, they tested Ava. Meh.
post #31 of 293
Thread Starter 
So, her crib would be completely enclosed and separate? Has she learned how to climb off the bed yet? I just took the bedrail off my bed the other night because Dylan can now climb down off the bed. It gives a couple of inches of extra space. IDK what to say about your dilemma. I guess I can't quite understand what the issue is.

Hmm...with that HIV test, it still seems to me someone would have to give consent for them to do that. Everything has to be consented to some way or another. There's usually a blanket consent statement on admission papers that most people don't pay attention to. That's probably how hospitals get away with doing that test without telling anyone.
post #32 of 293
Quote:
Originally Posted by MarineWife View Post

So, her crib would be completely enclosed and separate? Has she learned how to climb off the bed yet? I just took the bedrail off my bed the other night because Dylan can now climb down off the bed. It gives a couple of inches of extra space. IDK what to say about your dilemma. I guess I can't quite understand what the issue is.
Hmm...with that HIV test, it still seems to me someone would have to give consent for them to do that. Everything has to be consented to some way or another. There's usually a blanket consent statement on admission papers that most people don't pay attention to. That's probably how hospitals get away with doing that test without telling anyone.

 

Her crib would be completely enclosed. I don't think I want to do that. She hasn't learned how to get off the bed yet. She still wants to go head first. Gotta work on that!

 

Based on what the NICU doctor told me and then my research afterward, medical professionals are REQUIRED to start AZT within 8 hours of birth for an HIV pos baby to minimize the chance of it developing in to AIDS. They do not need parental consent to do that and in fact if parents refuse or somehow try to stop it, the state can take custody because it's considered child abuse. I came across more than one instance of that happening while I was researching false positives for rapid HIV tests in newborns. When I asked my OB about it, he said that if Ava had stayed at the first hospital, they would have just tested me since I declined the test during the prenatal bloodwork. I asked a friend that is a LDRP nurse at the hospital Ava was transferred to and she said they actually test pregnant moms twice during pregnancy due to the higher risk population that is usually treated at that hospital. And they still do a test after birth but usually the mom is there to test.

post #33 of 293

I think they can get around the consent if withholding it would be considered negligence. If Ava WERE +, then obviously witholding the medication could be considered negligent (ie a judge would easily overrule the parent's decision if they said no). But... it's all a moot point if she's negative, so that's a load of crap that they wouldn't listen to Lauri's request to wait for further testing. 

post #34 of 293

Oh, also scary, I know it's different here in Canada, but I was all pumping myself up for a fight by declining the blanket consent forms, and I wasn't given ANYTHING to sign at all upon admission to the hospital. Not a single document. The only time I signed was on the paperwork to leave the hospital. Though come to think of it, I think that may have all been birth certificate stuff, and not even hospital stuff. Kind of crazy...

post #35 of 293
Thread Starter 
I was talking about consent to test, not consent to administer meds if the baby is HIV+.
post #36 of 293
Quote:
Originally Posted by MarineWife View Post

I was talking about consent to test, not consent to administer meds if the baby is HIV+.


I guess with a newborn and they are working with the 8 hr time window, they treat it like an emergency. They wouldn't withhold lifesaving treatment if they couldn't get in touch with the parents or legal guardians. My understanding is they did the test before DH was allowed back in the NICU so he hadn't signed anything.

post #37 of 293
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by AnnieA View Post

My understanding is they did the test before DH was allowed back in the NICU so he hadn't signed anything

still seems off to me but maybe they can get around informed consent if they say it was an emergency. my issue with that would be what's the connection between oxygen levels/heart problems and possible HIV that would make it critical for them to test her? In other words, what other reason specific to Ava's situation besides it being a routine newborn test was there to test her without parental consent? if you can decline the prenatal test and you can decline testing the baby in the hospital, you should be able to decline the test even in an emergency situation.

i came back cuz i thought i was going to have a few to type but D crawled into my lap and is nursing. maybe later...
post #38 of 293

I don't disagree with you that we should have been able to deny the test on Ava. If I had known that it was routine to test any newborn that comes in to the hospital if the mother's HIV status is unknown or the mother is unavailable for testing, I would have verbally refused the test to the NETS team that came to transport Ava. But I had no clue that it is a routine test. I was angry about that for a long time actually, that no one ever talks about this. I feel like there should be a disclaimer when you are offered the HIV test during the prenatal screen that if something happens to you during labor, then they will need to test the baby. When I told my birth story at my local birth circle a few weeks after Ava was discharged, every single pregnant mom there was shocked. No one is warned about that.
 

post #39 of 293
Thread Starter 
Yeah, that is just wrong. I can understand the hospital staff's feeling that they need to test the babies but it still needs to be something that is clearly disclosed and explained. I apologize if I brought up bad feelings or anger over that again. I just have such a hard time understanding that sort of thing. I really don't get why medical people don't see how that's an invasion of privacy. It seems unconstitutional to me.

Dylan was asleep but he just woke up again. Sean has gone up there but I think I should go to make sure he goes back to sleep. I'm running on fumes again because he's been so restless the past 3 nights. Tonight will be the test of whether it was just because all 5 of us were crammed in the bed or something else. Sean sleeps in the other room when he has to work in the morning so he doesn't wake us all at 4 or 5 am.
post #40 of 293

It's ok. It was a pretty infuriating situation. The thing that made me the most angry was that they seemed to be unable to use their brains and think logically about the situation. My rapid was negative, her western blot for HIV 1 was negative and the chances of her having HIV 2 were slim to none. But because protocol said they had to keep administering AZT until both western blot tests came back, it was like no one could use their brain and think through the idea that Ava was most likely not exposed to a strain of HIV that is primarily in West African countries. irked.gif

 

I don't think I could do five in the bed. I get frustrated and want DH to go somewhere else when it's me and Ava in our queen bed!
 

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