bi weekly chat July 2-16 « Back to Group Discussions

[flavorfull1]

HI!  I finally have the brain power and free hands available at the same time!  Life is getting easier bit by bit over here and that is nice. I am still trying to adjust to a new place/new town and just meet some friends.  It gets lonely but it is not overwhelming. DH had to work the whole weekend and that just makes the next week feel so long.  DS is working on two year molars, they are seriously a form of torture for all involved.  They are his last two teeth and yay that they are almost done!!!  Probably just in time for DD to start on her first right lol.

So, how do you help your LO sleep when your older kids are so loud?  DD isn't able to be put down yet to sleep, she gets about 15 min by herself then freaks out about being alone and wakes up to start routine over again but I am sure some day I will need to figure this out.  

How is everyone?

[RosieL]

Flavorful - glad things sound like they are settling down a bit for you guys, despite the need to still wear baby to sleep all day. I assume you've tried heating rice in a sock wrapped in a shirt you've recently worn? How's the new town? I am starting to meet people, in my old town, through LLL meetings. I really like them! And it's one step toward finding like-minded moms.

We have hit the three month mark nd I think the fussies are starting to subside. We get some smiles at night but mostly just kind of chilling. A vast improvement over the constant rocking and bouncing. I feel like we have hit a stride. Now I have to learn to leave him with my mom and the daycare this and next week. That's going to be so hard on me. Probably no problem for my mom, DS and the daycare lady!

[chiromama01]

Hey ladies.  Flav, ds used to sleep right through the noise, but now, not so much.  haven't really found a solution, but i totally get where you are.  lately ds only cat naps, which is hard, because he's so tired during the day now that he constantly wants to be held, so i'm having a hard time getting things done.  

rosie, adjusting to outside care for you LO is never easy, but it does get a little easier with time, especially if you have found the right person.  good luck :) 

AFM... i'm way overdoing it as usual.  ugh.  dh's schedule at work is insane, which means my life is ridiculous, as usual.  on the upside, i'm having sucess with upping my milk supply and thus my stash in the freezer, so that's a big relief.  on the not so upside, i think i'm starting my period... ugh. really? 12 weeks pp and it's back already???? WHAT??? oh well.  such is life.

How's everyone else doing?

[piratemere]

Flav, I've got no advice for your, I'm afraid. My house is, and has always been so loud, I don't think DS has much choice but to sleep through it.  I am not a quiet person myself, and don't really ask my older boys to be so, and from day 1 DS has just been able to sleep through the madness.  Have you tried white noise machines?  I know my sister and her light sleeping family can't live without them.

Chiro and Rosie, I don't envy you at all with all your childcare/working/pumping.  I don't know how I would ever do it if I had to.  I'm so glad your supply has started to go up Chiro!

AFM, I have had terrible diarrhea all weekend and vomited twice on top of it. It's still going on, and I don't know why.  I am not otherwise sick (no temperature, weakness, etc.) It would be incredibly unlikely, as we've only DTD once, and I haven't had my fertility back until 15-18 months after my last two boys, but I think maybe I should take a pregnancy test, just in case. I know it's almost certainly not the case, but I'd like rule it out so that I can get on with feeling better.  On a good note, I've lost 5 lbs through it!

[lalazap]

Hi everyone, thanks for keeping the chat threads going! I'm always reading but not often having time to post.

We're doing pretty well here at 10 weeks out. DD is so frickin' adorable these days, chatty and super smily. We have ramped up our EC-ing and she seems pretty happy about that - I suspect that the "random crying" from a few weeks back was partially due to discomfort of a full bladder and then of a wet diaper. I guess she is also getting close to the end of the fourth trimester and seems to be able to organize her states a bit better.

People keep asking me if she's a good sleeper ... really I have no idea what that is supposed to mean at 2.5 months old.  I always answer 'yes', because she goes down pretty easily sometime between 8:30 and 10:00pm and then isn't up for the day until around 9am, but they look at me a bit funny when I say she's a good sleeper and then go on to describe 'only a few' night wakings. No way is she or I sleeping through that whole time. She usually sleeps a 4-5h stretch at first and then starts squirming, snorting, kicking her legs - I stick a boob in her, sometimes change a wet diaper and she goes back down for a couple more 2-3h stretches, with a dramatic morning poop sometime around 6am. Sometimes her night sleep just segues into a long morning nap. Right now it's almost 11am and she's been sleeping in bed since a feed/change at 7:30am. So she hasn't really been full-on awake since 9pm last night - over 12h ago. Seems like a lot of sleep, but I read about people here who's babies are literally sleeping continuously for over 10h at a time. That is SO not my girl.I wonder about trying to prolong that first longer stretch somehow but whatever I think I'm going to try (patting and shushing her back down, pottying her while semi-sleeping) always ends up seeming like way more effort than just nursing her back down. I may try building her a night diaper with a fleece liner so she feels drier in case a wet diaper is what's making her restless.  I feel pretty well-rested so that's the most important thing, no? 

I am becoming obsessed with babywearing and am spending a lot of time online pretending I'm in the market to buy several new carriers. DP does not understand why I would need yet another carrier and will be totally annoyed if I buy more - even if I spend my own personal money on them. But I need to switch it up, especially as so far DD does not nap in the day unless she's in a carrier. I was loving the Moby for quite a while but am no longer feeling it - I think because it is too hot, DD is starting to get pissy in it unless she is asleep (I think she wants to be able to see the world), and I have to pre-wrap it if I think I might want to wear her out in the world as it is too heavy and bulky to stick in the diaper bag. I have a pouch sling that we are using a bit more now but I haven't totally mastered it and it's not great for long carries. And we have an old Babytrekker from DSS's baby days (8 years ago!) which I have tried several times, but DD hasn't been happy in it yet and I find the strap adjustments really awkward, and if I'm going to be perfectly honest it's forsst green, ugly as hell and I don't want to wear it in public. :) I'm thinking of looking for a ring sling and hoping that it will be an improvement over the pouch sling.

Squawking baby, gotta go.

Edited by lalazap - 7/3/12 at 12:04pm

[NicMom]

Well, when it rains...  I was laid off this morning.  So now both I and DH are unemployed.   Not a comfortable position to be in.  DH had originally turned down an internal position in LA because we really didn't want to move and I had my job here.  Well, that is no longer the case and that LA position is still open so it looks like he may get it.  It isn't our ideal location - if we have to leave Phoenix we want to be near his family in San Diego, but it is a job.  I think we are going to put our house on the market regardless as we have a lot of equity and he will just commute back and forth until it sells. 

So we have a plan.  It isn't a fun plan, but it is a plan.  On the bright side I no longer have to worry about pumping and I have a HUGE stash of milk in the freezer.

[chiromama01]

Lala you crack me up. Im right there with you on the sleep thing. C doesn't sleep ALL night but he doesn't really keep me up all night either... My dh doesn't understand my need for yet ANoTHeR fabulous diaper bag, but really, it's a necessity, right...the right bag for every occasion, I mean...
Edited by chiromama01 - 7/3/12 at 5:23pm

[chiromama01]

NIC i'm so sorry.  that must be so stressful!  are you referring to LA as in los angeles or louisiana?  I'll be thinking of you guys and praying that something opens up in a better location soon.

[flavorfull1]

Rosie wohoo for hitting your stride! It feels so good right? I will be thinking about you and leaving your LO. That sounds tough.

Jenny um update on that pg test! Sorry you are sick though.

Chiro so sucks to have your period back. I was super bummed. I was realy hoping for a longer break.

Lala i am definitely obsessed with carriers. I have three sites i regularly browse just drooling over carriers i would love to have. Dh doesnt get it at all.

Nicmom hugs to you. That sounds so stressful. I am sorry you lost your job. I am glad you feel good w a plan even though it isnt exqctly what you want.
.
Dd slleeps well too at night. She probably wakes up 4-5 times between 9pm and 8 am. This is remarkably different from ds up very 45 min for a year and a half. Iam really trying to work on putting her dow for bed time and she slept by herself from 9-11:30 last night! Seiously awesome! I didnt know what to do so i sat dow and watched hells kitchn lol. She loves bath time and i only manage maybe o e bath a week for her bc her skin is so dry ut she just splashes and squeals. So sweet. She was born i n the water ( belated shout out of thanks to lala for research and encouragement) and she is definitely a water baby. Dont remember who it was that said to watch for it but you were totally right! Ok going to try to put her down and see if i can get a second night w free hands wohoo!

[piratemere]

Flav, you just posted your 1000th post!  Just saying.

Nic, that's terrible. I'm so sorry.  What a blessing you have the other job for DH as a back up. Thinking of you as you work through the move and everything.

As for the pregnancy test... I actually went to the drug store today to get some aloe gel for a sunburn, and looked at them. They were $16 a piece!  So, I suppose if I don't kick the illness soon I will go down to the dollar store and buy some for $1.25.  Don't worry, you ladies will be the first to know.  It's such a remote possibility that I'm really not worried about it.  But, wouldn't it be funny if it were the case?

[saudade]

Ack! Sucks about AF for those who have gotten it! I'm anticipating it soon, especially since Lennon is supplemented some now. I'm sure that has kicked ovulation into gear. Lennon is now 11 lbs 9 ounces @ 10 weeks which according to an online weight percentile calculator, she is now in the 57th percentile for weight! YEAH!!!!!!!! I'm so sad that it was formula that finally caused her to catch up, but I'm trying not to feel bad about it because it definitely won't do any good to my psyche, so what's the point in focusing on that? I'm ordering Domperidone tomorrow, so we shall see how much difference it makes!

 

[adoremybabe]

Lala I've been thinking about a new carrier too but luckily I've been able to keep myself from browsing. The moby's are stretchy right? I was thinking that it looked a lot more comfy for DD because of the way that she likes to cuddle. If you say that they are really hot though I'll stick with my Bali Breeze because we've been near 100 and humid here lately.

I"m so sorry to hear your bad news Nic. I'll be thinking of you and praying for a quick GOOD solution.

Flavor - I feel like all that I do is harp on my 3 older kiddso to be quiet when Baby J is sleeping. Sometimes I wish for quiet little drones. Then I realize how stupid that sounds.

AFM - DD had her 2 mont appt this week and is 13 lbs 9 oz. and 25 in long! She is growing up was too fast. I can't stand our Dr though. I got the run of the mill lecture about how the CDC HIGHLY recommends vaccines. Apparently DD should be picking things up and pushing herself up with her arms when on her tummy. At her 4 month check the DR expects to see her balancing upright and eating rice cereal. GAH!!! I can't stand her! I will likely tell her that she needs to do some current research for the sake of her patients' lives and her career.

[arbybee]

I'm also hunting for a good baby carrier. We have the ergo and the maya wrap and I love the ergo but it is damn hot/bulky. I feel like the wrap/sling system would be so much better but I can't seem to get comfortable with it. I'm thinking it's because H is so big that carrying him in the "newborn" carries is why it's not working. Fingers crossed for a better fit once he has head control and we can rock a different carry.

Nic, I'm so sorry and I hope you find a solution soon.

I'm ending my "maternity leave" and I went to go check out a daycare. I'm super bummed about it, much moreso than I thought I would be, and the idea of leaving him with someone else feels akin to cutting my arm off. DH makes enough to float us for the most part, but my student loan forbearance is up in November and I basically have to work in order to pay that bill alone. I seriously stay up at night fretting about money and if I'll ever have any.

[chiromama01]

Originally Posted by arbybee 

I'm ending my "maternity leave" and I went to go check out a daycare. I'm super bummed about it, much moreso than I thought I would be, and the idea of leaving him with someone else feels akin to cutting my arm off. DH makes enough to float us for the most part, but my student loan forbearance is up in November and I basically have to work in order to pay that bill alone. I seriously stay up at night fretting about money and if I'll ever have any.

ummm.... ditto. sorry the daycare didnt thrill you.  hope you find the right one soon!

[Jessimaca]

Had a moment, which I never have.  I still have not hit my stride unfortunately because my LO is still not latching .  Trying to just take it one day at a time because I start feeling really depressed and overwhelmed at the thought of pumping and feeding for a year.  It's so hard and takes up almost every moment of my day.  Still trying and trying to get her to nurse because then i wouldn't feel chained to my house.  I mean, yeah, I could take the pump out with me and try to find places to pump when I'm out and about but I always have the baby with me too and her screaming while I pump is disconcerting.  She has also just started teething! I didn't even think that was possible this early!  I hope that doesn't hinder our process even more.  Sorry to be such a downer...

I try to get on and read sometimes, hardly ever have time though.  But just wanted to say hello and I'm still here.  My LO is adorable, despite all our difficulties and I'm hoping things will get easier for us soon.  On a positive note, I am staying home for 3  more months.  Basically she is such a needy baby so I can't even fathom anyone else caring for her with the same patience as me!  We totally can't afford it, but I really feel like I have no other option.  I'm hoping the extended time at home will help us get into some kind of flow and hopefully nursing.

[Thursday Girl]

Flavorful- glad your getting settled in, I'll be up to visit soon and we can hang out, as much as I was hoping to talk Hubs into moving there, after he moved my mom up and it was over 100 degrees I can be assured now it will never happen. As for sleeping with loud kids, like Jenny we are a loud family, she minded at first but has already become accustomed to it.

Rosie- glad you hit your stride. I'm sorry about daycare, that was really hard for me the first time.

Chiro- sucks about the period.

Jenny- let us know for sure.

lala- people always ask me that too, I am always confused by and get the same sort of looks when I describe her sleep.

Nic- so sorry to hear you got laid off, it sure does always seem to happen in torrents too. Glad you have a plan, amazing how a plan can make you feel so much more peaceful about a situation, and totally yeah on not having to pump anymore.

saudade- hooray for nice weight gain. Did the package get there? I have some friends who have used domperidine pretty successfully.

adore- the vaccine issue is so much fun isn't it? My friends son just came down with a mild case of pertussis, at first I was just thinking about my unvaccinated kids who were at her house (not Cora) while he was puking, but then I got to thinking---he's vaccinated! Heck of a lot of good that did, so i decided I was glad my kids didn't get all the chemicals and nasty stuff since it doesn't really seem to work anyway. Now I am watching my kids though. Cora is a bit snotty and coughed a couple times like the snot was stopping her breathing back in her throat. cross your fingers. We had a super shitty Dr in the past and I am thankful for my pretty understanding doc now.

Arbybee- sorry about the daycare situation, we had a hell of a time finding one after my first

jessimaca- sorry about the tough time nursing, crossing my fingers it gets figured out, but yeah on getting to stay home a bit longer.

AFM-Hubs still working out of town, and last weekend (when he was moving my mom to NC) I had a bit of a cry fest on the phone with him...and on the phone with 2 of my sisters. Parenting solo just kind of sucks, and then on the weekends he comes back to town and works some more and it annoys me. The house is so beyond wrecked I don't even want to invite other people over. I was working on catching up the laundry which started the houses downfall and then started sewing some diaper covers that i could sell in the hopes of bringing in some extra money, which in my dreams gets used to buy crafty stuff and a serger but in reality will go for things we need, like new shoes for Hubs and maybe even a splurge like something fun for the kids...and maybe a bit of fabric. I did tell Hubs I'll have to go buy some elastic and thread. I think I want to do Joann's without the big kids. I feel like 4 kids isn't too hard but that the big kids have been watching too much tv....mostly b/c I have been watching too much tv as I became obsessed with battlestar galactica and I really wanted to see what would happened, I have not yet finished but am at that point where I am sort of sick of watching tv, it was just TOO MUCH TV and I would have been fine with a conclusion a bit sooner

[adoremybabe]

having a bad day but I feel so utterly guilty about it because I know that there are others out there with more difficult situations. i am upstairs in my room with a sleeping baby and the 3 other kiddos are downstairs watching tv. i just want today to be over.  i feel like the perfect example of why it's hard to handle a big family. i feel inadequate and unable to contribute to anything great in this world. i also feel alone.

hopefully tomorrow is better. it's got to be.

[chiromama01]

sorry for the hard day, adore.  just remember you are contributing 4 happy, attached, well loved, and well adjusted children to the world.  and if you've seen the state of many children out there, you'll be reminded of what a challenge that is! (their future spouses will be grateful to you as well!)

i hope tomorrow is better for you ;) 

[Thursday Girl]

Oh adore, I totally have those days. If it is just one day, I let myself have it guilt free and resolve that tomorrow I will wake up and DO something with the kids. We go to the park or a store or anywhere really, and just resolve to enjoy being, to live in the moment. It's amazing what laughing with my kids can do to my mood.  If it's a string of days, I talk to someone, a friend, my husband, my sister, one fo my DDC's. Then I get up and do something with my kids even if it's just dancing around the living room like crazy people.

[saudade]

Courtney- Yes! I got it, thanks so much!

Lennon's hair is falling out like crazy! Everywhere she lays, there is a pile of her little hairs and tonight when I gave her a bath and washed her head, there was a ton of hair coming right off onto the washcloth. She also has a big bald spot on the side of her head (she sleeps on her side) which looks really funny. I figure it's hormonal because right at the same time that her hair started falling out, mine started falling out in chunks when I wash it, too! Anyone's baby also losing all their hair? I figure that it will grow back blonde because her dad is blonde, I was blonde as a child and all my other kids are blondes. I never knew where her dark hair came from in the first place.

In other news...she found her HANDS! So cute.