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needing feedback on comment bf made

post #1 of 8
Thread Starter 

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Edited by breakfastblend - 7/18/12 at 7:05pm
post #2 of 8

My boyfriend's daughter is beginning to get a bit of a tan, also, and many people have said she looks good.  She does- it puts color into her cheeks and she looks healthier, not so washed out.

post #3 of 8

I love the way my children look when they get a bit of a tan from outdoor play. I don't see the connection to sexualization.  

post #4 of 8
Thread Starter 

Thank you for the replies.  That was exactly what I was needing to hear.  I've been a bit burned in the past, so probably am overly sensitive, but glad to know it is nothing to worry about.
 

post #5 of 8

I agree with the other posters.  He very likely means looking good, like active and healthy.  Sometimes I notice that my older son looks almost glowing when he's just gotten a little pink on his cheeks, and I love the way it looks, in a motherly kind of way.

post #6 of 8

I am married to an elementary school teacher - but before we were married - i was a single mother of two young children and he was my boyfriend.  I REALLY understand where you are coming from right now! 

I also think this was an innocent comment - just something you say.... when my 2 yr old tries to put on my sunglasses we say the same thing..... 'looooking goooood!'

but your heart is in the right place - its OK to be very very cautious and suspicious ...and if he is a good guy ....time will prove it!   Walk slowly and keep your eyes open

post #7 of 8
Thread Starter 

Thanks again, and motherhendoula, I appreciate your comment coming from a similar place of understanding.  These days you can never be too sure and I have to do my all to protect my children.  That is a great correlation to the sunglasses, though.

 

One last aside, I suppose I also thought it was odd that he said this about his daughter, but not his son.  I'm guessing his son is getting tan as well, but why not comment on that?

 

Thanks again everyone!
 

post #8 of 8
Quote:
Originally Posted by motherhendoula View Post

I am married to an elementary school teacher - but before we were married - i was a single mother of two young children and he was my boyfriend.  I REALLY understand where you are coming from right now! 

I also think this was an innocent comment - just something you say.... when my 2 yr old tries to put on my sunglasses we say the same thing..... 'looooking goooood!'

but your heart is in the right place - its OK to be very very cautious and suspicious ...and if he is a good guy ....time will prove it!   Walk slowly and keep your eyes open

 

Yes to this. There are pedophiles out there who use dating websites to find single moms because it can be an easy way to get access to kids. My cousin has a friend who is a CPS worker and sometimes the mom is dating a guy they've come across on other cases in the past, so my cousin put the fear in me good (it was already there, so I was downright paranoid for a while there!) I'm a really light sleeper, and for a while when DH and I first moved in together and he got up in the night to use the bathroom, I'd wait a minute then sneak out of bed and make sure he wasn't in one of the kids rooms. I know he's a good man... but you always hear people say they had no clue what was going on in their own home, so I made it my business to know. Anyway, I understand.

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