Pregnant with #2 - Bad reaction from Ex

[mamatoemily]

Hi everyone...I'm not sure if this is the right forum to put this in, but I am wondering if anyone else has had the same experience.  

My DD is 21 months and my XH and I split up when she was 5 months old.  I have a new partner who is absolutely wonderful and we are now expecting our first child in March.  I told XH the news yesterday and he completely freaked out.  He said that before my new child is born he will be taking me to court to get 50/50 custody of our DD.  Currently we have joint custody, but she lives with me and he sees her quite a bit depending on his work schedule.  The 50/50 thing is, I believe, just about power and about money.  I think he is pissed off now that things are working out for me, and not for him.  He is the one who left initially when she was 5 months and moved in with a new GF only 4 weeks after.  

I realize that he is having a lot of emotions because I am happy and having more children with someone else (he has tried to get back together, while still with his GF, many times over the last year).  I am trying to be understanding, but his rude words and threats of court are stressing me out SO much.  He also was so rude when I told him...telling me to think of my life as a single mother with 2 children from different men, and how I was going to look...and that I was going to end up in a looney bin???? I realize he was just trying to hurt me, but wtf?!?

[EarthRootsStarSoul]

Blow it off. Let him react, not you.

[Goodmom2008]

No contact is your friend.  The only conversations that you should be having are to be about the child you and your ex have together.  Once he starts threatening court and 50/50, end the conversation.   Kind of hard to rant and rave at your ex when all you are talking to is empty air or a dead phone line. 

And I would not worry about his threats until you are served.  That's when you take it seriously and get an attorney.  To change custody he's going to have to show a change of circumstances (having another baby probably doesn't meet that criteria) and that it's in your child's best interest, which he probably won't be able to do. 

[mamatoemily]

Thanks for your responses.  I know I should just let it roll off, but when it comes to your child you know how hard that can be.