he comes home today!

[fishy]

i am so excited, my little one comes home tonight.

i have talked to him only twice this week and both times left me feeling really low. i got a 'hello' out of him on weds am b4 he walked away from the phone, and this morning, he only consented to come to hte phone if he could just listen and not have to talk. i told him i loved him and missed him and couldnt wait to see him tonight and then he was gone. too busy playing for time on the phone.

i dont care if, at 3, he doesnt want to talk ont he phone. but...it hurts a little. you know? i want to think that it is easier for him to just not think about me at all while he is gone and that is why he wont talk to me. but then i think maybe he just doesnt really need me? i dont know, i guess i feel like at 3, he'd be showing signs of missing me after a whole week away. is it just my co-dependent tendancies showing? an unnatural need to be needed? i am so so so happy that he has had a good week. if it was hard on him, id have been miserable all week. as it was, i had a nice quiet week and got to do some things with my friends (thanks dreadmama). now i am ready for my little guy to come home and i am afraid he doesnt even want to.

am i over-analyzing? am i pathetically needy? whats your opinion?

[L.J.]

You sound like a mom who loves her kid.

I'm glad he's coming home. I get excited when mine have been gone for 4 hours & I get to see them again.

I wouldn't think too much about how he's been acting. I'm sure it's emotional for him in many different ways. When he comes home he may let some of that out and act out a bit.....don't take that personally either. I think it's just a way to release. I'm sure he'll be comforted to be back home with his mama!

Enjoy your reunion.

[mocha09]

From what I've read, this behavior is totally normal. It is also normal for kids to act very aloof and apathetic when they are reunited with their parents. It's because they have built up a defence mechanism of not dealing with it, because they don't yet know how to process the emotions around it. I think this is actually a sign that he is missing you.

I'm so glad you're week went well. I know it must have been long. I hope you enjoy your day together.

[toepea]

I have to agree that his behaviour is normal, maybe not a defense mechanism, but a difficulty in meshing his two lives? When my boys went to visit their dad the last time (which was only their 2nd visit) we agreed that if they wanted to talk to me they would call *(and I told their dad that too), and they didn't. I know that frequently when their dad calls them it is an interruption in their time and I have to make them talk to him. They have to stop what they are doing and try to answer their dad's questions while still being here, where he isn't. When we all lived together and their dad would travel and call home it wasn't an interruption, it was just saying hi to dad. But it is different now. I don't *know* their life with their dad, and he isn't a part of our life, so I think it is their way of dealing with that separateness.

Of course it is hard for you, and all of us, and it is very natural to want to feel like he misses you. I know he does and that is a promise. With you he is **home**, every where else he is a visitor and he happens to be visiting his dad. What is that saying........'home is where the heart is' , or something? You are his heart and soul and with you he can just be himself, not a visitor. And, you will probably not see the polite, well-behaved visitor side of him either. You get the real thing.

[carmen veranda]

I agree with the "this is normal". And you are "normal" too. It is not co-dependent to miss your little buddy like crazy. He is only 3. He is still your baby. I would be lost after a week, I think. A week is a long time. Almost longer than he can consciously remember. It will feel so good to get back into your routine. I hope you have a wonderful reunion week.

[Patchy Dragon]

So glad to hear today is the day!!!

[fishy]

he had a great time and he clung to me like a spider monkey all evening.

he seems to have done just fine. things feel no different than b4 he left so...i guess i have niothing to complain about!

[mocha09]

Hooray!