thank you for your suggestions,
If I cared if something got destroyed or not, I put it up, and she had to ask to use it, I'd watch her use it, and we'd put it back up when she was done. One thing at a time, always under supervision
That is a simple, good idea, it's just so damn hard, ykwm? I am trying to get my work done and am seriously overwhelmed, and than I'll try to supervise my bunch of adhd kids. I know it's the way I *should* do it.
Plus my DH (ADHD :) ) leaves the stuff on the floor just like the kids. I am trying to establish an "board games only on the table" rule, but it does not even work with DH.
I found that high sensory activities satisfied this need for her. I would put some sudsy water in the sink and let her "wash" some plastic dishes, or have her play in the sandbox, or use play dough, or some other very sensory activity when she got too bad, and that did help.
Right, I think I seriously have to put more effort into the sensory issues, esp of DS. I don't have to many ideas though, and it takes so much time to find good ones!
I'll try today to get them the playdough out, sudsy water is such a big mess with my kids. (but we did naked bath cleaning (the kids naked) - and that was fun!)
If they destroy something an entire box of stuff from the room of the person who did it is boxed up and they have to show they can care for things properly before they get anything back.
Thank you for your suggestion, elus, but we are living consensually (at least trying to) and this sounds punitive to me. I am trying to avoid any kinds of punishment.
I think you need yo go through their things and remove any clutter because part of this may be a case of having so much stuff it is overwhelming to pick up
Yeah, one girl, I think that is one of the most important points. But it's sooo difficult! I cannot let go of stuff easily. I am working on it. I need to work on it because our ADHD brains need less cluttered environment. I am soo unsure how much stuff the kids actually need.... And I cannot really rotate because we have no storage place (which is laughable because we have a huge house, but not a lot of shelfs and closets)
how much stuff do kids need?
I also think you need to stop replacing items they destroy. Consensual living can include not encouraging destruction and materialism
Totally agree. I won't.
I find that if someone has to use a stool to get them down, that person is pretty seriously committed to playing the game and not likely to dump it on the floor and leave it five minutes later.
That's true for most kids, I think, but for mine there would be even a higher chance of destruction, because it include an extra fun part: Climbing on chairs! They do climb for the pure fun of it!
Ugh. That sucks. For lack of a better way to say it. Can you guys create a bucket of "junk" that is appropriate to "destroy"?
that sounds like a good idea. I am just worried about the need to generalize rules, what's your take there, do you think they can "understand" that they can "destroy" one game but not the other? maybe I need to mark the box or somethin...
I am thinking about an library system for the board games, like get one, leave somekind of "card" and give it back. Without card, no games...
We are living in chaos at the moment anyway, because of some reconstruction (kids got their own bedrooms) so maybe it's all just a sorting *Phase*