I'm sorry in advance if this is the wrong section, I'm not pregnant yet but most of my questions are about pregnancy/delivery and not so much about conceiving. This post might be upsetting to rape survivors, so proceed with caution.
When I was 18 I was raped my a gynecologist and I am just freaking out about being pregnant and delivering. I have been in therapy for years, group, one on one, I promise I've done everything you can think of. I still can't be in hospitals/doctor's offices without at least feeling fidgety and nervous, at worst I'll pass out from the anxiety. We're going to try with buying sperm from a bank first and inseminating at home first before we look at IUI and IVF (which in all likeliness will be necessary but maybe we'll get lucky :) )
Anyway, these are my biggest concerns. We live in Norway (I'm American, my husband is Norwegian) where they like to let things happen naturally. You have to actually petition for an elective c section (I can't find a lot of info on this in English yet) or go private which will get expensive. I know it's a long shot but maybe one of you has experience with something like this? I mean, I would like to have a home birth but because of my history I can see myself having a very, very hard time. I know without a doubt laboring and delivering in a hospital would be unbearable. I don't like to not know what's happening or going to happen, which is part and parcel when it comes to birthing so I'd rather have as much control as I can and schedule a c section (one of the biggest things is also being stuck with male doctors/nurses, with scheduling there's at least more reassurance that I will have my chosen doctor.) Again because of trauma I won't be breastfeeding, which is a very difficult decision to make in Norway. I just wish "my body my choice" expanded to birth as well.
Any advice would be appreciated! I have bookmarked a few articles that advise doctors how to treat patients who are rape survivors that I am thinking of emailing to the doctor that I choose and see how she responds, does that sound like a good idea?