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7/15 Weekly Thread - Page 2

post #21 of 44

Hi mamas!


travelmumma, I asked my mom to host my baby blessing after she was born, so that's how that worked.  Maybe just invite a couple friends and host it yourself?


mamabeakley, I TOTALLY AGREE my allergies are kicking in big time.  Not the sneezing part, oddly: its my throat, it tiches and itches even when I stay in the house all day its better but not over.


and my belly feels like it just popped this week too!

post #22 of 44

Mamabeakley- yes yes ye to allergies getting worse! I am allergic to Pinapple, but can normally drink the juice just fine. However I recently had a small SIP of mixed juice and all of a sudden was scratching at my throat and came up in a huge puffy red rash!!!


According to some of my friends the same thing has happened with them.. It seems to just be a case that our bodies/skin are extra sensitive at this time??

post #23 of 44

Huh. Interesting about the allergies. I've been bothered by them a lot more this pregnancy compared to when I had DS. I figured it had to do with moving to a grassier, greener, more trigger-rich environment but maybe it's partly just pregnancy too. Last time I had horrible pregnancy rhinitis, this time nothing. That was actually one of the first things I thought when I got a BFP..."please don't let me get so congested again!"

post #24 of 44

Now I'm wondering if maybe I have a low-grade cold or something?  I feel like if I sit still (which I can do, since we are visiting with my wonderful MIL) I can just about breathe.  Mostly.  It's worrying me, but if it doesn't get any worse I can just about manage.  :-(


This doesn't solve my current problem but I just got a phone call that we are FINALLY (at least some of us - the automated phone system wasn't that informative) approved for medicaid where we are actually living.  I am SO relieved - it's been almost 2 months since I applied and because the system is so messed up it's eaten up a lot of my mental energy trying to deal with it.  I'm sure it will now take MORE mental energy to get it properly set up - but WHEW.

Edited by Mamabeakley - 7/19/12 at 9:07am
post #25 of 44

I have to chime in on the tiredness! My poor husband is basically flying solo by 7:30 or 8:00 every night. I will lay on the couch in the living room (or the floor in the hallway) if my little ones want mama to help them get dressed, but otherwise, he is totally in charge of baths and bedtime routines. I just have no energy by the end of the day. And housework has really slipped down on my priority list, so I don't really have the excuse that I have "done so much" today (other than growing a baby!). I am so glad that I have a break from work until September (I coach a small year-round swim team, so small that we tend to skip the long course meets in the summer and just take a break during July and August) because I don't know how I would be keeping my head above water if I was working right now.

post #26 of 44

Hi Moms :) Nice to chat with you!


I'm 18 weeks and a few days. Morning sickness finally stopped at 16 weeks and since then I've been feeling good. My only complaint is the tiredness. Many days I have a hard time waking up in the morning because I'm so groggy and my body is tired. Sometimes it carries on all day until I get in bed at night! 


I have two little ones, 4 and 2, and they keep me super busy. I'm trying to keep up with them! LOL


Sending hugs to everyone. 

post #27 of 44

Oh H@apy mama I am so jealous that your morning sickness has stopped lol!

I am 18 weeks today (yay!) and spent yesterday morning cleaning up after myself because I "missed" the toilet.. urgh...

I am feeling the same way today, but just hoping the food stays down because I have friends coming over!!

Still its much better than being sick 6 times a day! So I am thankful for that!!


We have had a bit of a drama over here lately. My super dooper amazing midwife has lost her driving licence.... which means she can't do house visits (she live an hour away!!) and it basically cuts my postnatal care completely. DH and I are very upset about it because she wasn't honest about it. If she came over and said "Look I have something serious to discuss with you" that would have been better... But I found out through putting the pieces together and talking to other Mummas :(

She has also refused to lower her fee even tho if would be us driving 2 hours to see her for every visit, and she would not attend us postnatally. She offered about 20 visits postnatally, so its a huge loss. She has also cut out a workshop she was going to have next weekend, and still hasn't lowered the cost.

I am meeting with another Mumma today (who was/is using the same midwife and due in 3 weeks, poor thing) to chat about our options. It really looks like we all have to get another midwife, which is such a pity but i just don't feel like I can trust her right now.

****Must add that Im not so much upset that she lost her driving licence, its more the fact that she lied about it and wasn't honest, when I feel that trust is the key factor in hiring a midwife**** 


So thats where we are at right now.. Not the best place to be coming up on the halfway mark, but Im determined to figure it out!!

Hope everyone else is well????

Sorry its such a selfish post :(

post #28 of 44
Thread Starter 

To all the mamas over morning sickness-Congrats!!! joy.gif I SOO wish I was there with you! 18 weeks tomorrow and still no relief :(

cieloazul-I get incredibly swollen sinuses every go round, lol, so I totally sympathize! With my first I assumed it was crazy allergies-now I know better winky.gif

I agree/sympathize with everyone who is tired! By the time 6pm gets here I am ready to go to bed!


Travelmumma-First off, huge hugs!! You are being entirely rational in feeling betrayed and disappointed that someone you trusted was dishonest about such a pivotal part of the care she would be providing...at least if she had been forthcoming you would have had the chance to make an informed decision about choosing her and what that would entail. I don't know how it works in Au but here I would be paying a midwife to attend a homebirth, if that is how it works for you, have you already paid her in full? I hope/pray that you are able to get some answers and a better sense of what is going on when you meet with the other mama and make the best choice for you and your babe. All in all sending peaceful vibes your way!


AFM-I am completely over the moon as a good friend of mine stopped by tonight unannounced and dropped of a box of amazing home grown rocket greens, fresh Belgian waffles ready for me to freeze for the girlies, black cherry maple syrup, gorgeous apricots from her tree, and 5 pounds of strawberries...it was soooooo nice! In other news still experiencing pretty gnarly all-day sickness, but I did find some amazing figs at Sunflower's the other day and stuffed them with a honeyed-thai chile goat cheese and then baked them until they were melty sweet spicy madness. I have a Thai chile bush in my garden that is rockin' out the orders, lol.


I hope all is well with you gorgeous mamas!!!

post #29 of 44

Travelmumma, that is just crazy! How can she cut out all these services that she was supposed to provide and think that people would still want to pay her the full price!  One midwife that I interviewed said that she would take $200 off if I would travel to see her up until my 8th month. Another said that since I lived so close to her and she would not be spending that much on gas she would give me a discount. Geez, if one of them had told me they couldn't come to do my prenatals nor my post partum visits I would ask them what exactly I was paying for at that point.
I'm sorry. I know how much you liked her too. greensad.gif I agree with you 100% that trust is a HUGE thing!

DarkBlue, I can't believe you are still sick. YUCK! But what I want to know is how you continue to cook up a storm feeling that way! Some mamas will always amaze me! Hoping you turn a corner soon and can enjoy your pregnancy.

post #30 of 44

travelmumma, I'm soo sorry she turned out not so trustworthy as a person.  I agree, trust is a huge part of the whole midwife thing.  I have to drive to meet with my midwife, but that was part of the deal from the beginning.  She also only has four postnatal appointments in the deal.  20 appointments afterwards is just like wow to me.  Prayerfully you will find someone else who can be good labor support.  I quit my previous CP when I found out that they would maybe be dropping out at 6 months, so at least you have an extra month over that, if its any consolation. 

post #31 of 44

@travelmumma--yes, we have a very prominent HBMW in our community who is going through the process of losing her DL due to repeated DUIs over the past few years, while she was/is a practicing MW. It is pretty hush hush still, but word is getting out. I know that some are still hiring her with the knowledge of this situation as she has promised to have secured rides for labors from her birth assistants, however, she no longer offers home visit prenatals. I do feel like this is the sort of thing that needs to be addressed by her to all clients up front, but I know she isn't handling it that way and it makes me sad for those who aren't aware of it and hire her unknowingly. I don't think she deserves to be out of a job per say because as a MW she really is an asset to our community, and everyone deals with demons and poor choices, however, this is a repeated issue {3 DUIs in the past year or two and they are with blood alcohol WAY over legal limits--like she is highly intoxicated not just had 1 too many}. Also, if someone is drinking this heavily and they have an on call profession how does that leave you confident in knowing that she won't show up to your labor tanked or maybe won't be able to show up at all? I don't know why your MW lost her license, but I agree that this was an issue that needed to be addressed up front with all interviewing clients--kinda like--If she though she may be moving out of state in 4 months, she should be mentioning that to clients who are considering hiring her, it really is not fair and doesn't promote any kind of warm fuzzy feelings of trust.


Alos, it makes it hard on me because I feel like I am outing her when people ask me why I am not considering her as they are--she was considered one of THE best HBMWs in my circle and I have many friends who have labored with her and loved her. I don't even personally know her, but I do feel like it is not ok for me to not point people in the direction of this info when they are asking me who I chose and why and who I didn't and why not--which is pretty normal convo right now in my large circle considering most of us are in various stages of pregnancy or TTC. I wish she would take the responsibility herself--from what I hear if she is asked directly about it she is honest, which is great, but if not asked then she is mum.


i say mourn the loss, but move on and see this as an opportunity to find the right fit for your family! I was at a loss as to who to hire because of this situation--we have a few other HBMWs but none who I was really considering and I still haven't seen anyone, but I have chosen a wonderful MW who I may have overlooked completely had I not been forced to really look at my options. I have an appt with her in August, but we have talked on the phone {and I did meet her once in person in 2004} and we clicked in a major way and I am SOOOOOOOO excited now ; ) Hoping for that same feeling for you, too, with the right person this time ; )


post #32 of 44

Ah such mixed news from us all! Travelmumma, I'm so sorry you are dealing with the MW issue, but a blessing that it is NOW instead of a few weeks away like the other mama you mentioned!


Also lots of hugs for those of you still dealing with morning sickness. I was sick for 5 full months with my first, so i can relate - I'm very happy that it was much more 'normal' this time around, but I have lots of sweet thoughts for those of you still struggling.


Mothership - I was measuring DOUBLE with #3 for awhile. There is only one of him ;) Sometimes, it just happens, is what i was told. So I would advise not to panic!


I had a great trip; glad to be home of course! We have been cleaning like mad today - shampooing carpets, the whole works. I just couldn't handle the house anymore, and DP has been so sweet - he sent m in for a nap around 3pm and finished it all up himself. I think he's glad to have me back, too.

post #33 of 44

Travelmumma, that is quite a bummer. I agree that a lost DL can be overcome, but dishonesty is quite a dealbreaker. I hope you can find someone reasonably close. I love what segolily said that it's nice to happen now as opposed to when you could pop any day.


Mamaharrison, I agree DUI does make it a different story. You need to be able to trust your midwife to come over at 4 in the morning. For my job, I see doctors get their licenses suspended or revoked all the time for being alcoholics or drug addicts, even when it's not happening on the job. That's marvelous you found someone else.


I just snagged a wooden high chair at a yard sale! I was just thinking about one last night.

I am still getting used to being pregnant but having no picture to see, no heartbeat to hear, and no kicks to feel. Just relying on the growing belly etc. is such a change from last time. I didn't realize how different it would be. I guess in another month I'll have the heartbeat and kicks and will get used to that :)

post #34 of 44


Edited by nhklh - 11/13/13 at 7:57pm
post #35 of 44
Just wanted to update on our Midwife drama.

So a run down of what happened.
Midwife came over last time and was acting VERY weirdly. Through bits and pieces of info I found out that she had lost her driving licence that weekend. I asked her why and for how long, as she said it would affect my care. She has lost it for 8 months for drink driving. She told me she had " misjudged how much she had drank by only a little..." . I accepted this and asked how it would affect my care- I would have to drive an hour each way to her place for prenatal visits and I would get no postnatal visits (she offered about 20). As well as this she is cutting a birth workshop worth $430. She didn't give a lot of details and I had to press for them.
When DH came home I told him what happened. When I explained that it was drinking driving and that she has an 8 month suspension and how she explained it as "a little over", he was shocked and angry and explained to me that "a little over" does not get an 8 month suspension. (which means she has either done this before or she was HUGELY over the limit. Either way not ok for someone who relies on travel heavily)
DH rang her to chat over some questions- mainly wondering if her fees would be less because of us having to drive and no workshop or postnatal appts.
When he asked if she would cut the fee because we would be driving an hour each way to her and that we can't write that cost off on tax and that she can, she said " I wont cut my fee for that because I can't write travel costs off on tax, I don't earn enough!" ... Thats a straight out lie. $4000 each birth and the tax thresh hold is $6000, and she attends about 2 a month.
She didn't cut costs at all. That, plus the fact that she wasn't up front with her drink driving and her lying about tax has hurt me so much. (she is either lying to us or the tax man)
So now we are going to re interview the MWs that we met at the beginning and some new ones.
It's just so upsetting because she "was perfect" and this dilemma plus the fact that docs here won't see HB mummas has left me with NO CARE whatsoever.

So that's that greensad.gif. But going to look at it as an opportunity to find the best care for me smile.gif
post #36 of 44


Edited by nhklh - 11/13/13 at 7:58pm
post #37 of 44
Happy to go under the radar! Any suggestions on where to find someone or how to?
Would LB have any recomendations?
post #38 of 44

Can you find a doctor and tell him that you had plans to HB but now you have changed your mind and want to be attended by a doctor (then you can "change your mind" again in a few months)? winky.gif

post #39 of 44

Travelmumma- I am so sorry that you are going through this right now! I had a really hard time selecting a provider this time. I must have interviewed the midwives at all of the birth centers in our area and I was nearly ready to just give up and continue to use my OB (I like him and trust him, but just didn't want to have another hospital birth), when my doula suggested a birth center that is much farther from our home. I was a little nervous to do so, because ultimately traveling to prenatal appointments and (eek!) heading there when we are in labor will be at least an hour drive. I was very nervous thinking about what would happen if I went into labor during rush hour. Anyway, now that I have met them, I am really excited about this birth and I would be devastated if something were to happen to change my opinion of them and I had to start over at square one. Sending you some BIG HUGS and hoping that this all works out for the best.


Darkblue - Tell me more about these figs! I have really been in the mood for figs lately. I was feeling so awful in early July that I didn't go out to my grandparents farm to pick figs for making preserves and now I have missed out on the season for our area. No way that I can afford buying 5-10 pounds of figs for preserving, but if I find some nice, fresh ones at the store I will gladly buy some if the recipe is worth it.

post #40 of 44

I have to say I am a little jealous of all you ladies who talk about it being a stretch to travel 1 hour or more to birth center or hospital. I am at least 1 hour away from any and all birth support (well, 50 minutes from my midwife) and my hospital of choice if I need to go to the hospital in labor is an 1.75 hours away. The joys of rural living I guess.

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