Feel like the only one...

[callahansmama]

Hello mamas:) I live in a tiny remote town in northern Canada and I am not super suprised that I am the only one I know here that nursed longer than a year. I am part of a facebook group for mothers back home in a larger area and I am so shocked to noticed that not only do I appear to be the only one who nursed past a year, the vast, vast majority formula fed right from the beginning and plan to formula feed future kids. I am planning to move back home in the fall and these women are friends, friends of friends and aquaintances who are sort of my pool of people to have playdates with and connect with as a stay at home mom for at least a year.

I am trying very hard not to be judgemental as i know that breastfeeding has it's challenges and i am blessed to have had an easy time with my son (26 months, nursed until 23, weaned when I went away for 3 nights and now I am expecting a daughter in November and plan to nurse into toddlerhood again). But I can't help but wonder why, out of 130 women, so few breastfeed! It's a little discouraging because the entire group seems to very pro formula and I often feel like I am the odd man out. I am trying to connect with other mothers who have similar philosophies and will go to the LLL meetings once a month once I move so that I can do so but I am just astounded that out of the 50 or so regular posters, only one or two breastfeed their under 12 month babies. Not that I can't be friends non-breastfeeding mothers but I think that my passion for nursing is a big part of my mothering style and I find that mothers who never breastfed tend to think my nursing my son for 23 months is nutso.

Is this a regional thing or do others find themselves to be the exception rather than the rule?

[mariee]

Well, I'm thinking that perhaps more of the moms breastfed than was obvious, maybe?

I'm not clear on the facebook group you are part of- did the members have to declare whether they bf or formula feed?  

Its quite possible that there are more quiet nursers out there than you think.  I'm certainly one of them.  I have a large group of mom friends and aquaintences in my town, and even with the closest friends, none of them know that I bf'd my DS until he was 27 months.  It just has never come up, I didn't bring it up, and we only nursed at home anyway by then, so no one would have had the opportunity to actually see us.  

[callahansmama]

That could be true. It's a group of mothers that started out as friends of a friend of mine, that all walked together and had babies around the same time. It has expanded since then. We ask eachother advice mostly and discuss local resources, activities... Maybe the nursers just aren't the ones that comment.

[MommyToAllZs]

I felt the same way until I started going to LLL and have made several friends through that now and have playdates with them. They are now my core group of mommy friends moreso than the women I was friends with before. That would be where I would start, but I know it's going to be hard. Good luck!!

[Katie T]

I hear ya and you have my sympathy. I feel the same way and even the toddler LLL meeting don't help because there are like 2yr olds and I still feel out of place with my 4 yo. : (  Just remember we are doing the best for our "babies" and you have us here who totally understand. 

[jammomma]

I live in a huge metropolitan city with millions of people and I feel alone and weird for continuing to BF my three year old. The only place I find women similar to myself is on Mothering.com.  I am certainly the exception to the rule where I live. Thank heavens for MDC.