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Weekly Chat 7/23-7/29

post #1 of 114
Thread Starter 

First of all, CONGRATULATIONS to Amy Sue and Momtoafireteam!!! Their LOs were born last week, all healthy! We should start a baby picture thread, similar to our belly picture thread to see all the newborns coming in!




Thought I'd start this weeks thread because I absolutely cannot sleep. Regardless, welcome to a new week! I don't know about you guys, but I am extremely thankful for a fresh start. Last week was quite a bit of a hitter for me on the emotional side of things. I've been feeling incredibly edgy and not very fun to be around, I'm afraid. I feel like I just want to go into hiding until this baby comes out. And heck, even for a few weeks after that. It's not physical ailment though- I feel fine. It's just emotional exhaustion and a readiness to start the next part of life. Anyone else feel this way? 


I found out last week that my boy's brain is super healthy and the level II u/s was just basically for cautionary measures. I'm glad they found out that he was safe n' sound though... He looks SO chinese on the sonogram pictures, which comes from his father. I have a feeling that they are going to look very similar. I am praying and preparing myself not to be swayed by this... but the fact is, I miss his father very very much. And there is absolutely nothing I can do about it. It's pretty absurd to miss someone that single-handedly ruined my life and wanted to kill our son's... Maybe it's a pregnancy thing. Something emotionally triggering me to want to be in a traditional married relationship welcoming our new baby happily together. ERG. #frustratinglydepressing


On a positive note, it's also almost August! My apartment complex is letting my sister and I terminate our lease early to move into the bigger place in time for the baby. We'll move August 10th and I am extremely excited to start getting set up. Can you believe it's such a short time until our little ones are due?


How's everyone else doing this week? 

post #2 of 114

Well, since i'm awake I'll post some too.  :)


YAY!  Healthy babies!!!


Anya- Sorry to hear about this past week for you.  but, each day is a new day!  I'm REALLY glad to hear that Nico is okay.  I'm sure he'll be beautiful.  Hopefully he'll remind you of the good times you had with your ex. not the bad.


AFM- nothing big going on.  Forgot to take my 31 week pic this weekend.  Will have to take it on Monday.  crap, oh well.  I have some photo shoots coming up this week.  A family shoot on Wed and a short wedding on Sat.  (they just want ceremony and group shots)  That's about it.  I start my 2 week MW appts on Wed.  I'm looking for a fishie pool.  My MW has one I can use, but i have to provide the liner.  Which is only 15$, so we may go that route.  I need to order my birthkit.  I actually have a small list of questions to ask my MW.  nothing super big, but since I usually don't have anything to ask, it's kinda big.  

I've been watching www.MyBirth.tv  -the homebirth video diaries.  They are UK births, so a bit different, but still homebirths and such.  


Oh, DH introduced my son to 'choose your own adventure' type stories on a long car ride today.  Not in a book or anything, but in a verbal story.  yeah, Future Dungeon Master?  cringe  i hope not.

Baby is moving.  I was just rubbing the belly while I was driving today and I got lots of movement,not necessarily kicking, but rolling.  copying?  :D


I NEED to start preparing DS a bit more for birth.  He's seen a few youtube videos, but nothing great.  I'll probably show him a few of these.  Not clean, they show heads emerging etc... some quite moms, some not so quiet.


How's everyone else so far?

post #3 of 114

Doing well, congrats to momofafireteam - I hope everyone is doing well. 


Yesterday I felt great, I think I might have overdone it a little, feeling a little more sore today.  I shouldn't have a roomfull of company all day like yesterday, so I plan on just resting, pumping, and visiting Baby K in the NICU.  I think  my parents plan to be over for a while, but otherwise it's just me today.  Dh is going to work today and maybe tomorrow.  I should go home Wednesday sometime so I think he will probably take that day off work to get me home.  We don't have a plan as far as visiting after I go home.  Last time when I was discharged, Dr. just told me to drive when I felt like I could safely do so.  I drove to my appt a week after (we live 45 minutes from Dr./Hospital) and he seemed REALLY surprised.  This is a different Dr. so I don't know what his orders will be.  They say Baby K will probably be in the NICU for 3-6 weeks.  I'm re-thinking my time off work, and may actually try to go in some during the time she's in the NICU and then take my maternity leave when she comes home.  I need to discuss it with dh and my employer, but if I could work in the daytime and visit the NICU in the evenings, I'd save some of my FMLA time to spend with her at home getting her adjusted to being home.  Any thoughts?

post #4 of 114
Amy- I think "saving" your leave time for when she is home sounds like a great idea, as long as you are physically up to going back to work.

Anya, sorry you are having a rough week. but YAY about the brain scan! you must be so relieved!

Katt- lol.gif about the dungeon master comment!

AFM- we took a week long road trip last week and it was super fun! got to finally meet IRL an MDC mama I've been friends with for about 3 years, then got to catch up with a college friend who I haven't seen for probably 6 or 7 years. DS did awesome in the car- even on the really long car days- almost 5 hours one day- he played with his toys, stickers, pipe cleaners.. it was great. What exactly is the allure of stickers? anyone? He just plops them randomly, sometimes in a pile even, onto a blank notebook page and he will do that happily for hours! we did some camping and that was great too. Actually I slept better some of the tent nights than some of the hotel nights!
That was my first official week off of work, so I'm just about to start my first at home week off. so psyched! I would normally be getting ready for work right now, but instead I'm about to be getting ready to go to the pool for a fitness class!
The weather has been merciful. I looked at the extended forcast and it is all sunny and in the 80s for the next 2 weeks. I hope it is cooling down for other people!

Here is a weird pregnancy TMI pain.. does anyone else have weird pain/pressure in the vulva? I feel pain in the left labia and extending into the groin sometimes- usually in the morning after getting up, but sometimes throughout the day... weird. 34 weeks this wednesday- its all going so fast!
post #5 of 114
Originally Posted by MadiMamacita View Post

Here is a weird pregnancy TMI pain.. does anyone else have weird pain/pressure in the vulva? I feel pain in the left labia and extending into the groin sometimes- usually in the morning after getting up, but sometimes throughout the day... weird. 34 weeks this wednesday- its all going so fast!

Yes. Some mornings it feels like someone kicked me square in my privates. I've also noticed a lot more bone-related pain down there. The pelvis is definitely shifting and stretching.


Amysue and Momtoafireteam: glad that you and the babies are safe and healthy!


Anyarose: I'm glad Nico is ok! Pregnancy makes us super emotional, but don't sell yourself short, you are working through a complex situation, too. I'm glad you are so open to and accepting of what you feel. Imo it's much better to get it out than to just deny it.


AFM: My upper back pain was terrible last night and did not go away when I laid down. I was in agony for 3 to 4 hours. Eventually I put on a tight tank top to support my boobs, and it slowly went away. I may need to start wearing sports bras to bed. I did my exercise yesterday and my pelvic spirals/ cat cow, so it's not that I'm not trying. Probably going to buy myself a snoogle because my long straight body pillow isn't doing enough of what I want. I might also have to see a chiropractor just to release some of the compression in my ribs.

This past week was a smack in the face: hello 3rd trimester!!

post #6 of 114

Congrats on the births of healthy babies!


Anya, so glad the ultrasound showed that your baby is nice and healthy! and that is great news about the apartment!


AFM - I have a midwife appointment on Friday and baby IS head down!!  Yippee!  I got most of my birth supplies and I am feeling pretty organized.  There is a lot to be done at our house, but it is frustrating because it is mostly stuff for my DH to do.  I don't like when things that bug me are out of my hands!  I am feeling really great.  Starting to feel a little foggy and tired in the mornings, but otherwise plenty of energy.   DD is spending two nights with my mother-in-law this week.  I have only been away from her for maybe five single nights, so two nights in a row is find of a big deal.  But at least I will be working during the day and just try to stay busy at night, then we have a whole fun weekend to spend together.  I too need to start doing more to mentally prepare for birth - like reading Bithing from Within and watching birth videos.  Same with preparing DD and probably DH.  I will be 34 weeks on Friday, completely crazy!

post #7 of 114
AnyaRose-- I think your mournful feelings of not having your baby's father around are normal, legit, and should really be explored. Clearly you had shared good times with your son's father and really, he did help you in the creation of your son-- even if he doesn't realize what a gift that is.

More to.respond to but my phone made everything disappear again. Ugh.

I have no.birth kit... haven't seen my midwife since early June... house is a wreck... I'm oddly zen about the first two, but the messy house has me slightly panicky. I think the next three days are just supposed to be 93/94* (which is pathetic that it's "cooler") so maybe I can try to get a few things done. I'm 33w2d today and still feeling like this baby creates a "heavy" situation... not that this baby is large, just applying a lot more low pressure than any of my previous pregnancies. I do hope this baby is working on arrival plans-- just not too soon wink1.gif This morning I did experience a contraction that made me catch my breath. It was just one but kind of freaked me out. Hopefully it was just a freak.occurance.
post #8 of 114
Originally Posted by MadiMamacita View Post

Here is a weird pregnancy TMI pain.. does anyone else have weird pain/pressure in the vulva? I feel pain in the left labia and extending into the groin sometimes- usually in the morning after getting up, but sometimes throughout the day... weird. 34 weeks this wednesday- its all going so fast!


Me too!  I figure it has something to do with my Baby B being down so low in my pelvis that we can no longer see his/her head during ultrasound.  Mine is worse when standing/walking and usually goes away when I lay down. 


AnyaRose - So glad to hear that your ultrasound went well and everything is fine with your LO.  I think those pregnancy hormones are definitely behind a lot of the emotional ups and downs but when there are other things going on in your life as well, it's bound to be even more emotional.  I think you're doing the right thing by focusing on the positives :)


amysue - I think that saving your mat leave for when you can actually be home with your baby is a great idea but make sure you are up to being back at work.  Especially if you have to be up at night to pump, that can lead to some pretty exhausting days. 


MadiMamacita - I can't imagine camping with this belly!  You are one brave mama!  I remember my DS in his sticker days...he loved making long lines of stickers...like one huge traffic jam lol


Ascher21 - Hope you're able to sleep better tonight!  My husband actually suggested I get "one of those pregnancy pillows" because I have been having so much trouble sleeping but it just doesn't seem worth it now when the end is in sight :) 


judybean - I'm there with you, my house is a disaster and I'm feeling mostly ok with that, but then slightly panicked at myself for feeling so ok about that lol  Maybe once you have a few kids you realize that you're just going to end up winging it anyway...? :)


AFM, I am feeling such pain in my pubic area for the past week or so.  I have an ultrasound and clinic appointment at the hospital on Thursday so I will bring it up, but man, is it uncomfortable!  I really feel like I am waddling and pretty much limit myself to what I really NEED to do because it hurts just to get around.  My girls finally seemed to have weaned but the past two days one has been asking to nurse again...not sure how I feel about that.  I have really honestly enjoyed our breastfeeding relationship but cannot imagine tandem nursing two sets of twins....so I don't want to encourage her to nurse but I feel really guilty about saying no.  And I can't really talk about it anywhere because most people have been very disapproving of me continuing to nurse the girls through this pregnancy period. 

post #9 of 114
Originally Posted by mamalovex3 View Post

I really feel like I am waddling and pretty much limit myself to what I really NEED to do because it hurts just to get around. 

go find yourself a pool to get into. I did a water fitness class this morning and it feels SO good. all the pain/pressure/heaviness goes away and it feels so awesome to be able to MOVE!
post #10 of 114

You're right!  I went to the beach last week and it felt amazing.  The problem is that I spend most of my days alone with two 18 month olds...so swimming without another adult is pretty much a no go.  We do spend a lot of time in the backyard with the wading pool lol

post #11 of 114
do you have a gym or community center with a pool and childcare? ours is like $2 an hour for child care.
post #12 of 114
Hi all. So excited about the healthy babies and feeling like everything is starting to really happen!

AnyaRose, so glad to hear Nico is ok! I was thinking about you last week.

Judybean, isn't it strange to think of anything below 95 as "cooler?" hah. Today the heat index in Chicago is something like 105. I'm sitting in front of our little window unit that's struggling to cool the living room down to 85, I think it is just overwhelmed. I'm going to take a few cool showers today.

At my ultrasound and appointment last week my midwives discussed the possibility of my seeing a maternal fetal medicine specialist because there is a 19% discordance in the girls' sizes. A is measuring about a pound smaller than B at 4 lb 2 oz. we decided to hold off til my next ultrasound on aug 2 to decide about the MFM specialist since although small, A is still in the range of normal. I'm not super concerned, because I know those size estimates can be way off, but I have definitely bumped up my protein and fats consumption this week. Grow, baby girl!!

My complaint of the week: there are too many people in this house and I am desperately longing for more privacy. Our roommate has a friend staying this week, but they will be going on your with their band the first week of August. We also host travelers through AirBnB.com and while that has been a source of extra money, I am so sick of having strangers here. Most of the guests have been fantastic, considerate, and hardly here- after all, they are here to see Chicago and typically spend most of their time sightseeing. But our current guest, a girl from China, has not left the house. At all. She is here for six nights (only one more, thankfully) and its driving me NUTS. at 2:30 this morning she woke me up doing laundry. Our machines are in the basement, right next to the room that SO and I have been sleeping in to stay cooler. She had also let my cat into the basement, the homicidal one that we have been keeping separated from SO's poor cat. This all despite the notes on the basement door and the fact that I'd already warned her about the cat situation- and who does laundry in the middle of the night like that? I want her out and I am so so glad we only have 2 more bookings.

Physically, I'm doing ok. Can barely walk and hardly sleep because of discomfort, but that's a twin pregnancy, I think. Very little swelling, tons of cervix pain when I get kicked, and the newest thing is a sensation that I need to poo, but don't really have to go. Could it just be one of them putting pressure on my colon or something? My Braxton Hicks are super intense and uncomfortable and now when they happen my heart rate shoots up and I get breathless.

So glad to be 34 weeks on Friday and so looking forward to meeting these girls!
post #13 of 114
Wendi, love dr hatoum in chi if you need an mfm. He is so knowledgeable and works really well in support of midwives in the city, even though open would think as an mfm, he would be biased towards a more medicalized model.

Who've posted about rib pain, OMG yes! It is insane. It makes me torque how I hold myself and my back has searing pain as well. I think I'm going to start chiro soon

Had a dream I was in labor but the baby wasnt coming out. Not terribly reassuring.
post #14 of 114

Should we start a "Birth Announcements" thread now that the first LOs have started to arrive?

post #15 of 114

I think both a birth announcements thread and a baby photo thread are a great idea!

post #16 of 114

AnyaRose--I'm so thrilled for you that Nico looks perfect!  And I agree with everyone who said that your feelings about your ex are normal and natural and need to be worked through. I can't imagine feeling so excited to welcome my new little one but at the same time being reminded of such terribly hurtful times.  {{{HUG}}}

Katt--I can't imagine shooting a wedding feeling how I do now. OF course, I think your weather is a bit better than ours ;)
amysue--Take it easy, mama!  I hope you work out a good plan for your leave. The only issue would be the medical/STD part of your leave which can be sticky in terms of "allowing" your return. Hopefully it's not an issue, and you can have many snuggly weeks at home with your bundle!
MadiMamacita--Enjoy your first week off work and at home!  You are brave to do a many-days-in-the-car trip with such a youngun while pregnant! And I have no insight on stickers. It's odd for sure!
ascher--UGH. That back pain sounds horrible!  Where was it, exactly? I highly recommend chiropractic care regularly during pregnancy. It's amazing the discomfort it can help with.
Ava's Mama--Yay for head down! AND being organized. I am so far from it that it's not funny. Two nights IS a long time. I think that's the longest I've ever been away, and my oldest is 6!
judybean--I definitely am carrying lower/feeling more pressure this time. Can't say I like it even though it might mean something good is working in there.  I'm with you on this awful heat--it needs to end.
mamalovex3--I loved your belly picture last week, by the way--you look amazing!!  I really dislike the phase of weaning where you have kind of exhaled that they are done and then they ask again. Can you just distract her, or is she super persistent?  Will the other one want to nurse if she does? I can imagine how you are feeling--I think I would feel a bit resentful if I had worked so hard to nurse them so long and thought it had ended well only to have it resurface and in a way that makes me feel uncomfortable.  Hope it works itself out!
wendi--Holymoly, I cannot imagine having random houseguests right now!  I nearly killed my own family after a long weekend! So glad you still are doing well...and I hope there are no concerns about the size discordance after further follow up. Certainly not something you want to mess with.
AFM--I am full of complaints right now, so I really just need to be locked in a room somewhere! As of this weekend, I'm starting to swell, and my pubic/hip pain is still around. It's ridiculously hot, with no end of it in sight. I could go on and on. But I won't. Because nobody wants or needs to hear it!!!! I really just wish that I felt better and had more energy to enjoy summer with my kids. I did a summer pregnancy with #3, and I LOVED it. This time, not so much. 

On a happier note, I went to a cloth diapering resale event this weekend and scored a a couple NWT newborn covers, some cute wool longies, and a few GUC infant prefolds. So we are set for diapers, I think. AND I have my very first woven wrap OTW as of today. I love BWing but have never bought a wrap--I use ring slings and SSCs. Beyond that, though, DH and I were talking the other night about having absolutely nothing ready and absolutely no inclination to GET anything ready. Which is doubly scary since with my history of BP issues, I could easily have a baby in 5 weeks!
post #17 of 114
So- peach crisp is in the oven (though I do hate using the oven in the summer, I REALLY wanted this). Now I just have to figure out what to go with it to make it dinner!

I have zero resilience these days. After a fine morning, the boys spent 20 minutes acting like they were on drugs rather than cooperate to get to their swimming lessons. They brought me to tears, and I've had a sucky day ever since. Under normal circumstances, it is difficult for me to get over a bad mood or rough time, but now it is impossible! Even after a nice, productive, and still low-key weekend with daddy playing with boys and cooking so I can clean/fix/organize stuff, my bucket is still nearly empty. As soon as there's a bump in our road (and having two preschoolers can create lots of totally normal bumps!), everything sloshes out. After a morning like this, I have to wonder how much I'm really cut out for parenting.

It sounds like there's just so much going on with everyone! I wish I had the energy and mental faculties to respond individually. I hope you all have great weeks!!
post #18 of 114

AnyaRose, so glad Nico is OK. I think your feelings about your ex are totally normal and I can understand your worries about how it will affect your relationship with your son. However, I bet as you get to know your little guy, you'll see him more and more as just who he is and less and less of your ex. You are obviously such a compassionate and strong woman and I have no doubt that that will serve you well in your relationship with Nico.



Mamalovex3, Foxsmama, and Wendipauline, wow you guys, and any other mamas of multiples out there, have my sympathy and respect . I'm hot, tired, sore and cranky with one. I can't imagine how you are coping with two!


Ugg, I wanted to respond to everyone but I'm all scattered. We have a thunderstorm rolling in, complete with Tornado watches. DH is on his way home from a weekend trip to BC and it looks like they are going to be driving through the worst of it. I'm sure there's nothing to really worry about, but motorhomes aren't known as the best tornado proof accomodations so I can't help worry a little. I'm basically sitting here watching the emergency alert system and hoping nothing worse develops! Please send good thoughts that he makes it home safe and sound!

Edited by Carlin - 7/23/12 at 5:00pm
post #19 of 114

OOPS, posted in last week's thread:


calpurina, so sorry to hear of your past few days! I would have a melt down, too! 


The people around me are mostly supportive. My BFF does talk about my "crazy homebirth" often. But most people know not to say anything to my face or I'll likely bite theirs off and blame the hormones. 


And yes, nursing really helped those pounds come off fast after birth! That was a nice little mother nature gift after the cracked and bleeding nipples. LOL


Had my midwife appointment today. Doing pretty good. 34+2 today. BP normal, uterus measuring 35. Gained 14 lbs so far. Baby is currently LOA and head is looooow bouncing off my bladder every second of the day. Got my homebirth kit... not much else.


However, I am really not liking this 3 midwife rotation. I feel really connected to one of them. I like the second one a lot but don't really care for the 3rd. It sucks I don't know who I'm going to get. And it sucks that I feel like I can't plan things with them because they seem not to remember everything I say at my appointments anyway.  Whatever, hopefully my super secret UC fantasy will come true. Hehe.


katt - thanks for the link! Definitely will be watching some homebirths tonight!


madi - I feel that weird vulva pain, too! Sometimes I would even describe it as a burning pain. I believe it to be the ligaments under the uterus.


I second that getting in a pool if you're having any sort of pelvic discomfort is totally necessary. It is HEAVEN. Float on your belly with a pool noodle and help "hammock" baby into an ideal position. I can't get enough.


9 more business days until I am off work. I CANNOT WAIT!

post #20 of 114
Originally Posted by Ava's Mama View Post

Should we start a "Birth Announcements" thread now that the first LOs have started to arrive?
I have been updating the roster with that info
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