Queer Conceptions - August 2012 - Page 9

[mrsandmrs]

outdoorsy - is the RE going to give you provera if AF doesnt show? 

Jenny - sorry about your bfn. are you going right into your next try or taking some time off?

I love seeing everyone in the tww and gearing up for their next try. there's so much anticipation! it's exciting. 

AFM- it's cd12 which means... we will be starting again in 2 or 3 weeks? wow, how did we get here already!?! this summer has flown by. today my dear wife and i had follistim injection training at the fertility clinic. It seems pretty easy except for remembering the order of all the steps? I guess we'll be pros soon enough. They gave us a DVD which I cannot wait to watch... sounds like high entertainment value. Everyone says those follistim needles are so tiny you wont feel anything, but I got a good look at them today and they seem plenty giant and painful enough to me. I'm so glad my wife will deal with jabbing me. I can't believe people jab themselves! 

In other weirdness, my clinic has a sign posted that if you write a good review of them (like, on yelp.com or whatever), they will give you a $5 gift card to starbucks. Now, first of all, isn't it unethical to *buy* positive reviews? Second of all, I checked their yelp profile and there are people who claimed the clinic dumped them for writing bad things about them. It's like, one of the strangest unethical business practices -- and who really cares that much about their business's ranking on yelp.com? Just don't be shitty to people. I can't wait to be pregnant and done with them. Also, how much mileage do infertility patients get from Starbucks cards? yes, i'm well acquainted with their caffeine-free menu, but it seems like a weird incentive considering the context. 

[lisedea]

Please move me to 'waiting to o'. AF today and got the okay to try again next cycle.

Thanks!

[JustAnotherJenny]

Sorry, Lise the the news is "official".  :-(

MrsandMrs:  That is TOTALLY bizarre about the Starbucks giftcard!?!?  And YELP????  I mean, I get that they are a business, but it seems that if you're in the health field that you really ought not pursue certain marketing tools.  Someone needs to work on their strategy.  Also, I believe as part of Yelp's terms of use that businesses aren't allowed to give incentives for having people write positive reviews. 

lovestreet:  Good luck on your tww!

easttowest: That is the BEST IDEA EVER.  In fact, I have a friend who is in the middle of her tww and she's on a carribean cruise.  I'll have to ask her if your strategy works!

wishin': welcome back!

angela: thanks for the love! I hope everything went well today with your IUI.

AFM: Thank you to everyone who has offered support.  I am doing okay.  :)  I am planning to go again this next cycle.  It looks like AF is on her way, but not quite ready to call CD1.  I think by tomorrow afternoon she'll be here.  This is actually great timing because then I can get my CD3 blood work done without missing work!  One thing I think I'll do differently this time is to try to stay busier and to not pee on any sticks!  Just wait for the beta.  (Goodness I hope I can pull that off!)  The real panic will set in if I'm not successful next cycle as that will leave me with only one vial of sperm left.  I'm trying not to think about that and am crossing my fingers that I won't need to figure out how I'll get more.  (You can tell I haven't been doing this long -- so much optimism! LOL!)

[pokeyAC]

Tara - I think I forgot to officially   you.  How is IVF going?  Did you have your transfer yet?

Lise - I'm so sorry.  That sucks.  I'm glad you're ready to try again.  Good luck!

[JustAnotherJenny]

Originally Posted by pokeyAC 

Jenny - Good luck with the job!  That sounds awesome.  I am working on my doula certification, and I have done 2 volunteer births.  Doula work does not dovetail nicely with my job.  I would love to move more toward birth work full-time, but I'm not sure how to do that just yet.

I like what you said about peeing on a $100 bill.  It probably would be more effective.

Lots of potty talk on here lately.

Pokey:  I'm really lucky to have a decent arrangement with my day job -- you know the one that actually pays my bills (mostly) and provides my health insurance.  They allow me to take one birth a month.  I find for me, that I'm comfortable with about one every other month.  My day job is in customer account management -- totally unrelated to birth!

I LOVE, LOVE, LOVE, LOVE, being a doula.  It's the one thing that will make it okay if I can never get pregnant.  For some people, I know it would make it more difficult to be around pregnant women and newborns all of the time, but being part of it, you get to revel a little in it too.  Since, I don't work with a lot of women, my clients and I tend to get pretty close and now I have a great network of really lovely lady friends and adorable babies to hold all of the time.  :-)  It really is the work of my soul. I feel so blessed that these women choose me to be part of their experience.  In my opinion, to be a birth doula full time, you're pretty much giving up having any kind of life.  That is A LOT of being on call.  In my area, birth doulas are asking between 500.00 and 1000.00.  When you consider the number of hours you spend with families before, during, and after birth -- there is not a lot of money to go around.  Doula-ing truly is a labor of love.  I wish you a lot of luck with getting something to work with your job, it's rewarding if you can make it happen!

[outdoorsy]

Lise - I'm so sorry. Glad you can try next cycle, though.

Mrs - My RE said it would be better to let AF come naturally unless it gets to be weeks late. I normally have long cycles, so it's not really overdue yet.

Re the clinic reviews -- YES that is very strange and sounds unethical to me! Outrageous.

[hoping2bmoms]

(((Lise))) sorry af reared her ugly head

Jenny I would love to be able to work with wome who are laboring and giving birth naturally...you are so blessed

Outdorsey. Sending vibes for a healthy cycle and that af visits you quickly so you can move on with the next cycle

Everyone else here's to af staying away and lots of bfps this month

Afm. I'm 4dpo and well really trying not to stress too much I'm 99% sure I Od on Monday and insemed with freh the same day and probably within 6 hours of when I Od. My biggest worry is 6 hours after O to late???

[tandy401]

hoping: i'm 7DPO and we feel like we prob insemmed too late, but we're using frozen. i think with fresh you have a longer window, so your timing may have been spot-on. fingers crossed. i'm here with you in the TWW. sooo brutal. 

[cordelia15]

lise. . sorry about AF. . . 

hoping. . I am not an expert in timing but that seems pretty close!  how do you know to the hour when you o'd?  

tandy. . I hope you are wrong about timing and a BFP is around the corner. . i am in the 2WW too and it is brutal! 

mrsandmrs. . good luck and yes, very weird about your clinic. . 

outdoorsy. . hope AF comes soon and you can get moving again! 

AFM. . I am 9 or 10 DPO  and tested this morning BFN which I knew I should not have tested yet but I have no control. . at least I am only peeing on $1.00 as they are internet cheapies!  I am not feeling hopeful but hanging in there since I know it's still early. . Going to try to not test again until Tuesday, we'll see what happens

[JustAnotherJenny]

Cordelia:  Good luck on not peeing on sticks!  Since I hate folding laundry my friend hid them on me in the clothes sitting in the laundry basket.  It'd have been weeks until I found them except that I had an interview and needed something out of there....  LOL  I had absolutely NO self control.

AFM:  AF came yesterday, so I'm back on The Train of Crazy starting tomorrow.  Baseline u/s and blood work tomorrow and starting clomid probably tomorrow night.

[twinkleeyes]

WOW! sorry guys have been on holiday so missed a heap! just tried to read the catch up posts..... so many different stages going on, its a wide world of experiences! 

Well AF was 4 days late )typical now im trying to track it) and now im tracking my temp, etc etc, im on day 12 of my cycle now but my temp hasnt gone up at all yet, and my OPK has showed faint lines for the past two days... now im thinking im all muddled with my cycle! Was planning on starting TTC in sept/oct then AF decides to throw the whole thing off! 

Frustrated! 

[cordelia15]

twinkleeyes, just keep testing . many people have a gradual surge, often called a fade-in where you can get up to three days of pos indication, depending on your brand, most aren't considered positive unless the line is dark or darker than control so the light lines just mean O is coming but not yet, test again tomorrow and see what happens! 

jenny, thanks!  I will try.  I wish someone would hide my sticks. . 

[hoping2bmoms]

Cordelia I dont know for sure but I always have distinct ovulatin pains and according to my trimming and knowing that my cycles have been pretty much predictable I can deduct that I should have oed on monday and i was having ovuaton pain from about 630 till about 8 then nothing and I insemed at 9.. No real science just knowing my body pretty well.

Tandy here's to perfect trimming for you and yes this tww is maddening

Afm. I'm 5dpo and still trying not to stress. I'm gona try to not even buy any sticks to. Pee on lol at least till I'm like 2days late.

Sending lots of baby dust to everyone else

[easttowest]

Well it's 7 DPO here, and she peed on a stick this morning stupidly even though it is obviously too early. BFN - duh. But it made her realize that she doesn't want the emotional negativity that comes with seeing a negative, even if we knew it would be. She wants to just wait for the missed period before testing again, but I want to test everyday, so we compromised on next Saturday, 14 DPO. Hopefully that's enough time, and hopefully I don't die this week.

[MonkCP]

So AF should have here today and didn't show. Tested and hit a bfn AF is always on time so I guess my wait will continue. My temp on my chart is still really high. For the past 5 days it's been higher than my whole chart so I guess it would be considered triphasic. So confused with my bfn...still hoping for a bfp! My wife and I are still trying to be positive but it's never easy to see that negative test when you want it to be positive so much!

[twinkleeyes]

Monk - good luck, maybe a day or so will make all the difference to ur BFP :) 

Cordelia - thank you! will keep checking, im on CD13 so fingers crossed I get a line soon, starting to wonder if im ever gonna O this cycle!

Easttowest - good plan! seeing BFN cant be good for either of you, give it till then and I will cross my fingers for you both :)

[cordelia15]

hoping. . that's great you know your body so well, I never felt O pains ever, was never able to find my cervix with speculum and mirror and DH and flashlights. .. so I mostly rely on CM and OPK's and luck, which apparently is getting me nowhere. . I feel like before having my first kid I knew my body better but think since I am still BFing and only have had 6 cycles I am still relearning everything, or more aptly learning a modified body

easttowest. . hope you manage waiting on the testing, it's hard. . .good luck though! 

Monk. . that seems really promising!  hope you get your BFP SOON SOON!  

AFM. . I think i have given up this cycle though I know I shouldn't. .next time I am just not going to have tests in the house until AF is due. . it's too hard to not use them when I have them and too depressing to keep get the BFNs.  It is hard to follow the advice you would give everyone else! 

[erinTNgirl]

Good luck shout outs to AngelaM, lovestreet, pokey, hoping, and tandy!!!!! 

Jenny: Sorry about your BFN! I feel ya on the one vial thing. We were lucky our bank called and a few more became available for our popular soldiers! That gives us 2 tries a piece left...still daunting

Lisadea: Sorry about your BFN! Good luck on the next cycle!

Cordelia: Poo on your BFN! It's not over yet!!

easttowest: Yes that is waaaaaay too early, believe me I made DP test at day 8, and it was a huge buzzkill  Be patient...yeah right!

Monk: NOOOOO!!! I have totally been watching you guys' videos, and they are uber insighful and fun to watch! Sorry for the BFN but keep trying!

twinkleeyes: Don't give up on the OPK's. I use the digitals b/c they are more accurate for us anyway. Hopefully, you will get a positive soon!

AFU: I am DPO 12 and feeling like AF is coming on with sore bb, irritability, and GI problems, TMI sorry. I am waiting to test until Tuesday morning if I can wait. The only reason I would test early is to get an appt with an RE. DP is DPO 4 with no symptoms of course. I am discouraged but hopeful about starting to see a physician instead of thinking we know all the answers! My DP informed me that she is not willing to go all the way when it comes to spending our savings on IVF or lots of treatments just for a child  That really hurt my feelings. I would go to the ends of the earth for a child, as I know most of you would and have. She has always been practical, though. In other sad news, one of our really great friends from Nashville, TN, who I never thought I would see pregnant, is 16 weeks. I am happy for her but really really jealous!! Ugh..anywho, baby dust to all!

[redrockband]

Hi, I'm new here. I have read here and there over the past 6 months or so and now my wife and I are finally ready to start taking some actual steps towards making a baby. We are still a few months out from actually trying, but wanted to say hi and join this community of helpful, experienced and lovely ladies as we learn more about what we should be doing and when. We just asked a friend of ours to be a donor and are looking forward to having conversations with him and seeing where that goes. 

We are excited for this journey and to meet and get to know others doing the same

[sotohana]

Hey y'all. I'm sorry I've been so absent. This year...I'm telling ya, it has been so shitty. On July 25th, DW's sister passed away. This was exactly three months to the day after her father passed. So, we went down to ABQ for the funeral and now her mother is staying with us for an indefinite period of time. The last thing I've felt the energy to do is keep up on the blogs and forums I follow, but I haven't stopped thinking about y'all. It's just taken an inordinate amount of energy to actually move from thinking to doing these days.

Anyway, enough cryin' in my panties (as DW would say)! I'm back now and want very much to keep up from here on out. Please come find me if I disappear, eh? :) 

So, biggest news first: DW has decided that she wants to take a step back from TTC and that she will be supportive of me prepping to TTC. This is pretty huge for me. When she said it and I looked in her eyes and really believed it, I just broke down sobbing. What an enormous weight that is to hear her say that she doesn't want to keep trying right now. She has wanted to carry a baby so badly and to know that she doesn't feel like she can continue with that right now just broke my heart in two. At the same time, though, I was crying because I too want to carry a baby with everything I've got. We both know 100% that neither of us would be willing to do this at the same time. So, here we are. I'm firmly in the Waiting to Be Ready camp now. For the next little bit I'll be temping and testing and reading and preparing myself. No one knows yet. Not a single person besides DW and I...and y'all. The reason for my hesitation to begin talking is because DW and I have so little time to really talk ourselves because of our second biggest news:

DW got transferred to Montana by her employer. They did this the same day she returned from burying her sister. So, now she's out there Tuesday through Friday. That's a huge reason why it would be difficult for her to continue insemming right now, but also she hasn't had her girl time in almost 50 days :( I'm beginning to worry, actually. I think she needs to go into the Dr. Usually her cycles come like clockwork every 30 days. In May after her father died she also skipped a period. Have y'all had experience with severe stress messing up your cycles too? I kind of think that's probably what it is.

So, from here were not quite sure what we're gonna do. We might try to find work in CO or NM. DW might try to find a different job here in OR or WA. She might go back to school for her masters so she could teach....there are a lot of options up in the air right now. One thing's for sure, though. We both want a baby sooner rather than later, so whatever we need to do to make that happen is exactly what we will do. DW was so sweet the other night. I asked her if she wanted me to try this month and she said, "maybe hold off on this month cause whatever happens, I know for sure that if I had a pregnant wife, I'd never leave my job. I want to take care of you, baby." Awww! I love her so much! And it made me so happy to imagine myself as her pregnant wife :) :) :) :)