Can I just say that I'm raging mad and hurt and feeling that stuff is really crappy right now? MIL is a cemetery person, she is in a club for people who go around and clean them up and make sure small cemeteries get on maps, etc. So, after charlie died she said she'd make the arrangements for the stone whenever we were ready. I told her we were ready on June 1st. Today she made the call. I've been basically hounding her to get to work on Charlie's stone, and she keeps putting it off. Finally, today she made the call- something that could have been done two months ago. We have all the money set aside, and know exactly what we want,but the holdup is on the fact that she "knows" someone.
I all but said that I was going to hate her forever if I had to lay my child's stone in the winter when all the plants were dead or if it had to wait until next spring. So she called. I want to bury one baby and have it all wrapped up before these twins are born, is that really so crazy of me? Apparently, she was grieving and it took her some time to be able to do this because it was a "hard" phone call for her to make. I would have made the call myself, months ago.
What we wanted was a stone that had his face engraved on it and his name, birthday and death date. That is it. Nothing else. Apparently, it doesn't exist. In order to have his face engraved it has to be black granite, and they basically just laser etch a photo on. It's not our style, its not what we wanted. We wanted it to look more like a drawing than a photo, and shiny black just looks so modern and weird out on a farm cemetery. (He is buried here at home).
They sent me all these proofs- and I just couldn't stop crying because it's so weird to see my baby's photograph on a headstone. It's just not right. It's not fair.
Follow Mothering