February '13 First-Time Mamas « Back to Group Discussions

[Dia]

Hi ladies, 

Any due in February moms interested in a first-time pregnancy chat?

One of the things I love about MDC is how many experienced mamas there are here, I have learned so much from all of them. But now that I am pregnant with my first, I am finding I like to seek out other first time mamas. All of this is so new. 

I'm curious to hear from other Feb. first timers:

How far along are you? How are you feeling? Have you felt movement yet? What are your plans for the birth? Is there anything about being pregnant that has been a suprise for you? 

[Dia]

I'll answer my own questions :)

How far along are you?

11.5 weeks, due February 25th.

How are you feeling?

Fine most of the day, but increasingly sick and fatigued as the day goes on. By evening I can't move from the couch. I am nearing the end of the first tri so hoping I begin to feel better. 

Have you felt movement yet? 

No...I can't wait to though! That will be so exciting!

What are your plans for the birth?

Homebirth with a midwife. I can't imagine birthing in a hospital. 

Is there anything about being pregnant that has been a suprise for you? 

I didn't expect to be so sleepy all the time.

I was also really worried about finding the right  "hands off" prenatal care that I wanted, but I lucked out and find exactly the right midwife practice, 5 minutes from my house, on the first try. Amazing blessing. 

The other big suprise was that my partner was immediately 100% on board with a homebirth. I expected I'd have to convince him, but he has been amazingly supportive! All in all, for an unplanned pregnancy, things have been falling into place pretty smoothly and for that I am grateful. 

[TallToriV]

Oooh! Ooh! I'll play!

How far along are you?

12.5 weeks.

How are you feeling?

Much better than last month, thank you very much! But I still miss the usual me. Still fatigue, headaches, random nausea here and there, the thrice-cursed bleeding, and this darned stuffy nose!!!

Have you felt movement yet?

No, but I'm VERY aware he's in there. Pressure is probably the best way to describe it. Despite what all the articles say, it's not gas, it's different. And I know when he's awake and squiggling around in there, but that's intuitive. Again, not something covered in the articles!

What are your plans for the birth?

Birthing center or home birth. We were decided on home birth, then my CNM unnerved us, and now we're considering both.

Is there anything about being pregnant that has been a surprise for you?
Good god, yes! The fatigue is way beyond anything I expected. I thought I'd be a bit sleepy, this has felt like a really bad case of flu. The congestion was unexpected. I did understand I'd feel icky, because I assumed morning sickness happened to everyone, but I didn't think it'd be a 24/7 inability to function. It has been. Probably the biggest surprise has been my drive to stop working and get ready to be a SAHM NOW, though. I really didn't think that would kick in until after birth, but here it is, and it's intense.
 

[Teles]

How far along are you?

14 weeks tomorrow

How are you feeling?

Pretty great these days, but it was rough sailing for the first 8 weeks or so. Mostly I'm just tired and hungry all the time, though certainly less tired than i had been feeling earlier (I no longer fall asleep at random in a seated position). Sometimes I get sciatic nerve pain, which is no fun, but otherwise I'm feeling pretty pleasant about pregnancy so far.

Have you felt movement yet?

I haven't felt it but a few days ago when I was using my doppler I heard baby kick it several times. It was fantastic!

What are your plans for the birth?

Hospital birth, but more out of necessity then choice. There are only two midwives around here so they don't do homebirths, but the local hospital is one of the best in country, so at least there's that.

Is there anything about being pregnant that has been a suprise for you?

I've discovered that everyday is a surprise while pregnant! Lately, I've been most surprised by how thick my waist has gotten without gaining any weight. I was kind of expecting a bump, but not an all around wideness this early. I was also quite surprised at how much acne my skin was capable of, but also how quickly I heal these days.

 

[Dia]

Originally Posted by Teles 

Lately, I've been most surprised by how thick my waist has gotten without gaining any weight. I was kind of expecting a bump, but not an all around wideness this early. 

 

This is me right now too. It's weird and hard to dress right - but I am trying to just let go of vanity. It will be a nice change to have an actual bump. At the same time I keep telling myself to enjoy this phase too, before I am too large and still have a lot of mobility, etc. 

[JessNP]

How far along are you?

I am 13.5 weeks

How are you feeling?

Still pretty crummy! Was hoping to feel better by now - it's gotta get better any day now. Nausea has improved, but still lingers. Still very, very tired with zero energy.

Have you felt movement yet?

Not at all! When I have quiet time or when I'm laying in bed, I keep very still and try to "tune-in" to the baby.  

What are your plans for the birth?

Hoapital for me b/c I am high risk.

Is there anything about being pregnant that has been a suprise for you? 

The unbelievable fatigue! I am used to always going non-stop 24/7. I can't believe how absolutely exhausted I feel all the time. I feel like I've been a zombie for the past 2 months and can't wait to feel better. I didn't realize how much I'd miss my wardrobe. Sorry if it sounds vain - I don't mean to be. I hate getting dressed...nothing fits right and everything feels so restrictive and uncomfortable - I see the appeal of the "moo-moo" now.  I miss wearing skinny jeans, fitted tops and heels - oh how I miss platform pumps! (I'm short, so I used to wear heels a lot).  

[Dia]

Originally Posted by JessNP 

Sorry if it sounds vain - I don't mean to be. I hate getting dressed...nothing fits right and everything feels so restrictive and uncomfortable - I see the appeal of the "moo-moo" now.  I miss wearing skinny jeans, fitted tops and heels - oh how I miss platform pumps! (I'm short, so I used to wear heels a lot).  

Don't apologize..I feel this way too! I miss feeling pretty! Heels and skinny jeans and sexy bras, all that stuff. 

[Teles]

Between the thickness and the gigantic boobs, I can't even imagine a shirt that fits right anymore. I allot a good ten extra minutes each morning to fuss with different shirts. I can't even wear the nice, trendy loose shirts anymore because they just make me look like a giant round blob in my midsectio

The trouble is that we're in the awkward stage between having a distinct pregnant bulge and not being able to properly fit in normal clothes. Soon we'll all pop and we won't even be able to see our feet to yearn for the times when we could don them with pretty shoes. One of my co-workers often reminds me that I'm not properly pregnant until I have to lasso my feet with my underwear just to get them on

[TallToriV]

Ok, I never thought I'd gloat about this, but I put on 30 lbs 2 years ago, after a much-needed 20 lb gain the year before that, and I'm LOVING it right now! 1) I don't have a discernible bump, the existing tummy hides it; 2) I already have clothes that work with pudginess, so the only maternity adjustments I really needed to make were pants/shorts, and 3) psychologically, I've already had to deal with my body image issues (I was borderline anorexic and SUPER uncomfortable with ANY fat on my body for years before the big gain). So sending my tummy love even when part of my brain is reeling in horror is kind of second nature to me by now ^_^ And now, I just think, "There's a baby in there! There's a reason for the pudge!" and get all happy.

I guess the positive message here for those who are used to having a tight body is that you can adjust to anything with the right mindset :-) (I'm also harboring the secret belief that breastfeeding and running after a rug rat is going to bring my weight back to a healthy level over the next year or so. Shhhh.)
 

[ISISandOSIRIS]

Great idea Dia!

How far along are you?
12w6d

How are you feeling?
Exhausted and easily out of breath. The nausea-from-hell has dwindled, but still feel it here and there if I haven't eaten for awhile. I also easily get heartburn and had a lovely skin breakout a few days ago, but it's healing now. Also, I wake up a lot during the night and am always having vivid dreams.

Have you felt movement yet?
No, but I'm always trying to. I sometimes feel like I sense the baby is awake when I wake in the middle of the night and I'll try to talk to it telepathically (lol), but I can't know for sure.

What are your plans for the birth?
Not sure, but I know it will be a hospital birth. I found a natural childbirth class that I'd like to take with my husband, so we'll have some options during labor. The class is supposed to be very good, just hoping it fits with hubby's school schedule.

Is there anything about being pregnant that has been a surprise for you?
Honestly, I was surprised by how much I HATED it, at first. I wanted to be pregnant for so long, and when I finally was, I felt so absolutely sick and miserable. I also just didn't feel like "myself." I'm finally settling in and enjoying it more now that the m/s is calming down.

[Jenny01]

How far along are you?

12 Weeks, 5 days

How are you feeling?

Mostly just tired and hungry! Although I have a few bad days here and there with nausea and extreme fatigue, I have not had that constantly so I feel pretty lucky.

Have you felt movement yet?

Not sure... I swear I felt some after my midwife used the doppler on me, for an hour or two afterwards I had fluttering sensations in the spot where she found the heartbeat.  Last night I thought I felt something similar too.  So maybe?

What are your plans for the birth?

Definitely leaning towards a home birth in a tub.  We live literally three blocks from the hospital so that makes me feel comfortable about trying it and the waterbirth aspect is really appealing to me.  Obviously we have to wait and see how things go, but so far there are no issues.

Is there anything about being pregnant that has been a suprise for you? 

Like most of you the fatigue has been the hardest and most unexpected.  Also instead of morning sickness where I feel like throwing up or NOT eating,  most of the time I had this weird burning hunger and I could not help but eat every 1-2 hours.  That started around 5-6 weeks and is now only starting to ease off a bit.  Some days I still have to eat really really often though.  My appetite has changed too which is just weird when you are so used to eating certain things and then all of a sudden they disgust you  lol!

I just got back from my first ultrasound!!!!  Here is the little nugget   There is only one in there which was a relief in most ways, although it would have been super cool to have twins.

[TallToriV]

Oh, look how cute!! So awesome that they're starting to look like babies instead of...odd tadpole aliens. ^_^
 

[Potpie]

I love this idea.

How far along are you?
14w5d

How are you feeling?
I feel great mentally, just so excited to be pregnant. Physically, I'm getting better. No nausea anymore as long as I don't take my prenatal first thing in the morning. Totally with everyone here on the exhaustion front, though. I worked for five hours yesterday and then came home, took a three hour nap and still slept twelve hours last night.

Have you felt movement yet?
I've noticed flutters when I'm laying down just the right way, and a definite pressure in the general area, but no kicks yet. Soon I hope!

What are your plans for the birth?
Home birth with a tub.

Is there anything about being pregnant that has been a surprise for you?
How every stage of pregnancy so far has had its own challenges. The first trimester had me constantly nervous, unless I was throwing up (because that's supposedly a good sign, and at that point you have so few other reasons to even believe you're pregnant that you take what you can get). And then now, I've heard the heartbeat multiple times but I don't feel movement and I don't feel sick anymore, and I almost miss morning sickness as my friendly reminder that everything's going good. That, and how ridiculously uncomfortable any kind of pants are.

[Dia]

Jenny01, that ultrasound, wow! Thanks for sharing with us. 

All of the other mamas, thanks for joining in, it's nice to hear how everyone is doing, I like that we are all within a few weeks of eachother. :)

Another question: How are your husbands / partners adjusting to this first pregnancy, and becoming fathers?

[Jenny01]

Originally Posted by TallToriV 

Oh, look how cute!! So awesome that they're starting to look like babies instead of...odd tadpole aliens. ^_^
 

Originally Posted by Dia 

Jenny01, that ultrasound, wow! Thanks for sharing with us. 

All of the other mamas, thanks for joining in, it's nice to hear how everyone is doing, I like that we are all within a few weeks of eachother. :)

Another question: How are your husbands / partners adjusting to this first pregnancy, and becoming fathers?

Thanks ladies!   I'm pleasantly surprised by how many are choosing homebirth - it's a difficult decision when it's your first and you don't know what to expect.  Its scary either way but I just really want to avoid all of the drugs and interventions if possible.  How are you all feeling about it?

My husband is really excited.  He's wanted kids ever since we got married (4.5 years ago!).  So I definitely think he's ready, although we both still can't believe its actually happening  lol!

[ISISandOSIRIS]

Originally Posted by Dia 


Another question: How are your husbands / partners adjusting to this first pregnancy, and becoming fathers?

I feel so blessed bc my husband has gone above and beyond my expectations. He's been so helpful. I was also surprised by how seriously he took stroller shopping! It's as if he's getting HIMSELF a new toy.

At times, I don't think it's fully hit him 100%. He's so happy, yet it still feels surreal. It's affected me more, bc I'm obviously feeling it more, but sometimes we just look at each other in complete disbelief that we're actually planning baby things. It's wild.

[joyriders]

How far along are you?

15 weeks tomorrow!

How are you feeling?

better than a couple of weeks ago, that's for sure, but i still have some nausea and gagging and i feel REALLY crappy if i don't eat regularly and it sucks.

Have you felt movement yet?

nope!

What are your plans for the birth?

i don't think you really can plan for it...it's going to do what it's going to do, you know? i'd ideally like it to be without intervention and result in me & the baby being healthy.

Is there anything about being pregnant that has been a suprise for you? 

how completely paranoid/worried i've been about something going wrong :(

Another question: How are your husbands / partners adjusting to this first pregnancy, and becoming fathers?

he's actually been pretty chill about it. he seemed more stressed out before it was a reality (like finances and if we are 'ready' but like, he has a good job and has been there for 9 years and he is 29 and i am 32 so it's not like we're impulsive youngsters). initially i think he was shocked it was actually happening because we were only going to try for two cycles this year and not worry about getting serious until next year...and then it happened the first try...ha! he likes kids a lot and is comfortable around them, so i don't think it's going to be too difficult of an adjustment.

[Dia]

Originally Posted by Jenny01 

Thanks ladies!   I'm pleasantly surprised by how many are choosing homebirth - it's a difficult decision when it's your first and you don't know what to expect.  Its scary either way but I just really want to avoid all of the drugs and interventions if possible.  How are you all feeling about it?

I am actually not scared about labor and delivery at all. The sole aspect of it I would be scared of is being in a hospital. I truly believe that would contribute a great deal to pain and anxiety for me. I'm looking forward to peacefully birthing at home.

I know I don't really know what to expect until I am in it, but a very deep part of me says, I already know how to do this.

If that makes any sense :)

[joyriders]

i'm not choosing homebirth for my first because in the event of an emergency, the closest hospital to our apartment is notoriously really, REALLY horrible and i do not want to take the chance of possibly being sent there. it has one of the highest infant mortality rates in the entire country, so no thanks.

like, for example, when my SO broke his ankle a couple of winters ago, the EMTs asked what hospital he wanted to go to, and when he didn't know they asked if there was one close to his home...when he told them what hospital it was, their response verbatim was, "no offense, but we wouldn't take you there if you were dead."

[Jenny01]

Originally Posted by joyriders 
Another question: How are your husbands / partners adjusting to this first pregnancy, and becoming fathers?

he's actually been pretty chill about it. he seemed more stressed out before it was a reality (like finances and if we are 'ready' but like, he has a good job and has been there for 9 years and he is 29 and i am 32 so it's not like we're impulsive youngsters). initially i think he was shocked it was actually happening because we were only going to try for two cycles this year and not worry about getting serious until next year...and then it happened the first try...ha! he likes kids a lot and is comfortable around them, so i don't think it's going to be too difficult of an adjustment.

That's what happened with us too! First try and we weren't even really trying that hard!  We were thinking about it, and planning on trying in the near future and then bam! First time not using protection and I had only been off the pill for 3 months after being on it for almost 10 years.  So it was slightly surprising! :)

Originally Posted by Dia 

I am actually not scared about labor and delivery at all. The sole aspect of it I would be scared of is being in a hospital. I truly believe that would contribute a great deal to pain and anxiety for me. I'm looking forward to peacefully birthing at home.

I know I don't really know what to expect until I am in it, but a very deep part of me says, I already know how to do this.

If that makes any sense :)

That's awesome!  That is how I feel most of the time, especially when I am reading books like Ina May's.  There is always that unknown part though - but I think the hardest part is the build up.  Once you are actually in the moment, its a whole lot different I'm sure!