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Why Do You Breastfeed Beyond Infancy? - Page 2

post #21 of 41

Because boobies fix EVERYTHING.  Why give up such a fantastic, reliable parenting tool? 


My daughter self-weaned just before the age of 3, because I had started to misuse that awesome parenting tool to get her to nap in the afternoons ;)  She's a bright little thing and caught on to the fact that when it was about 2 pm and I said "Let's go have cuddles and boobies in the bedroom" it meant that she would inevitably fall asleep.  Because I was going through a clueless phase I didn't get that the fact she was awake until 11 pm meant that she was totally ready to give up her afternoon nap - but she knew, and she started saying "no" to the nursing offer.  That was her last regular nursing session - bedtime was cuddle-time with Daddy - so when she stopped the naps, she stopped nursing.  A few weeks later she wanted to nurse again and she tried but there was no milk.  I told her she could probably get it back if she was willing to nurse every two hours for a few days.  She thought about it for about 2 seconds and said "No thanks" and that was that. 

But prior to that, nursing got us through her bangs and bonks from walking at 10 months, her pre-verbal frustrations, travel, owies, sadness, boredom - everything.  She's six now and sometimes I still miss it!

post #22 of 41

Path of least resistance and most benefits,  general ignorance on how to treat stomach bugs, colds and earinfections, and sleepiness other than through breastfeeding. Desire to follow my childs cues. Laziness. Actually, none of my kids ever had an ear infection.

post #23 of 41

Great thread. 


I continue to EBF because I know deep down that my son, now 3, wants it.  Also, for my emotional state after he was born too.  I am an assault survivor and can easily push away.  This has changed that for me.  I can attest that EBF is the best thing I have ever done.  It slows him down as well as myself.  I do not see an end in sight and that is just fine.  When pregnant, I only committed to 6 months.  I remember sitting in LLL meetings before he was born and seeing a woman (now friend) nursing her 2 year old and thinking OMG.  Now I am that gal.  Love it. 


I also get family members telling me "When are you going to stop" or "Is he still nursing?" and that is from my mother whom didn't nurse me at all (actually took the pill to dry up) and my husband's mother that nursed both her boys to 1 years old.  It sucks.  I really dislike defending my choices, or my son's needs.  The latest criticism I received I was told "It is your needs not his anymore."  Really?  censored.gif  It is both our needs at this age for him. 

post #24 of 41

I am still breastfeeding my 23MO and refuse to stop intill he says no!  It's his choice that I happily comply! 


The reason why is because I refuse to believe that at the magical number of 12MO my glands dry out and my

DS stops wanting/needingi it.  A cow is not a replacement for MY milk which is gold to him.   

post #25 of 41

I am still nursing my 2 yo twin girls because they still ask!  When they are not feeling quite right or are sleepy they like to have a nip!  So we do.  They don't need it to fall asleep tho.

post #26 of 41

I didn't really have any plans re nursing past a year, but my daughter is still totally into nursing and I enjoy it too, so I don't see any reason to cut her off. I don't have any particular goal now, we'll just see what happens. She is 13 months old now. Technically she's a toddler, but she still seems like a baby in a lot of ways, and the line between 11 months and 12 months is kind of thin and a sort of arbitrary place to draw a line imo. Plus as long as she is nursing, I don't have to worry about her nutrition.

post #27 of 41

My DD is only 11 months old, but I intend to breastfeed her until she's ready to stop.  I think for me it's mainly a matter of showing her that I will meet her needs, because she's pretty obviously emotionally invested in nursing and in the connection that it implies.  (She's refused to bottle-feed since she was a few months old, though she clearly knows what a bottle is for and how to get milk out.  And she eats plenty of solid food now and loves it, but clearly wants milk instead of solids sometimes.)  She likes to cuddle and nursing is a comfort to her, and always has been.


We want more kids, but we're content to wait while I breastfeed DD, even if it takes a long time.  I want her to know that she's loved and cherished and that Mommy will take care of her, and right now breastfeeding seems like one of the best ways to accomplish that.

post #28 of 41

ps. i look forward to what  name each child will give to it, so they have to be able to talk. Ds1 called it ''óngi'', ds2 called it ''nanas'', what will dd1 call it?

post #29 of 41

The short answer is because once DD got to be about a year, it was easier to just keep going and there was no compelling reason to stop.  Not only did nursing provide comfort and security for her, I really appericated the immunity benefits.  DD has never had an ear infection or been on antibiotics for any reason.  She's also never had a stomach bug for longer than 48 hours.  DD weaned just after her 4th borthday when pregnancy dried up my milk (I actually really encouraged it because dry nursing HURT) I really dread the first post nursing illness.


On a side note, when people say "it's more for the mom than the child" it really makes me feel a little stabby.  Not only is it obvious that the person has no idea what they're talking about, it's so dismissive and demeaning of the mom and her mothering.  









Please forgive my misspellings and typos.  I can't get spell check to work with my tablet.

post #30 of 41

Because it didn't make sense to me to stop because the calendar hit an artificial milestone, whether that be 3 months, 6 months, or a year.

post #31 of 41

Because it didn't make sense to me to stop because the calendar hit an artificial milestone, whether that be 3 months, 6 months, or a year.

post #32 of 41


On a side note, when people say "it's more for the mom than the child" it really makes me feel a little stabby.  Not only is it obvious that the person has no idea what they're talking about, it's so dismissive and demeaning of the mom and her mothering.  


That or they suggest the mom is getting some sort of sexual fulfillment of it. Um, projecting much, random judgmental stranger? Yeah, there's nothing more sexual than a toddler comfort-nursing because they fell down and hurt their knee. Really gets my jollies off.


Or if they merely mean it in an emotional crutch sort of way. Yeah, I'm really going to force my child to suck on my body part because I can't cut the metaphorical umbilical cord. He or she would be doing perfectly fine knocking back a fruit juice juicebox or chocolate milk from a Dora sippy cup, but darn it, I just really feel like whipping my breast out and shoving it in their face to prove their dependency on me. Right. Gotcha.

post #33 of 41

A personal anecdote about nursing and miscarriage--I've had 3 births and 3 miscarriages.  I nursed well into a pregnancy and completely through another pregnancy, both with successful births.  All three miscarriages occurred when I was NOT nursing.  For unknown reasons, I had bleeding  up to 24 weeks of pregnancy (or until miscarrying) with each pregnancy.  Nursing made me feel more secure--if I did miscarry, I still had my little nursing kiddo. I am not a medical person--this is just how it happened to me.

post #34 of 41

Because mothering my child knows no clock.  I don't care how old he is, I know that I need to meet his needs emotionally.  As long as he still feels that I can best meet his needs by snuggling while nursing, I have no issue stopping. With my oldest, we weaned (part him, part me) at about 13/14 months old and I highly regret it.  It exacerbated outstanding health issues and made things a lot more complex.  Once I let go of the societal notion that my child suddenly "grows up" at a certain birthday, I better met the needs of my boys.  #2 self weaned at 3 years, 7 months, and #3 is still going (albeit dry nursing due to my pregnancy and my milk drying up) at 30 months old with no intentions to stop anytime soon.

post #35 of 41

I was a SAHM to my 2 1/2 year old until last week when I went back to teaching.  Nursing him before and after work...and through the evening and night...is the best way to reconnect imaginable.


He had only ever nursed to sleep (unless he fell asleep in the car) for his entire life.  DH is home with him now and says he just falls asleep around the same time I used to nurse him down.  I was amazed (and yes, I believe him!).  Lots of folks said I should wean to "prepare" him for the transition of being full-time with me to being with dad, but I didn't even think about it.

post #36 of 41

Thanks for the info about miscarriages and nursing not being connected in your cases.

post #37 of 41

It is mostly the emotional bond for us.I am breastfeeding my 19 month old mostly because it is a special bonding time for us. He is definitely not a morning person (just like his Mommy), but a 15-20 minute nursing session helps us both ease into the day with some wonderful cuddle time with the person that we both love most in this world.  After he nurses he is ready to go for the day!  And so am I - he wakes up around 6:00 a.m. and I really do need some time before I get moving in the morning.  I just love cuddling my guy! A second/third nursing session before nap or bedtime really helps him relax and unwind - just like me.  He can be pretty intense during the day, and it is so nice to snuggle with him as he is drifting off.  It helps me to remember that he really loves and needs me, and makes it easier for me to chase him around constantly.  I initially wanted to breastfeed for "at least 6 months" when he was first born, and I "probably wanted him weaned around 9-10 months".  If you would have told me when he was born that I would be nursing him this long, I would have said that you were absolutely insane.  Yet here we are.  Breastfeedng is just a pleasant, soothing, wonderful time for both of us, and I love it!  The health effects are just an added bonus (although it is SUPER nice he has never had an ear infection before)!

post #38 of 41

My almost-14-month old, like a PP's, seems to be physiologically straddling the line between toddler and baby, and nursing still contributes to his nutrition, not to mention emotional needs. There are days that his solid intake is, ahem, less than consistent or balanced, and it's reassuring to know that he's still getting breastmilk. He was ill with an extremely high fever last month and bf'ing got us through a scary time when it was the only thing he could take in and the ER wasn't able to place a line for IV hydration. Sometimes it settles him down and gets him to sleep when nothing else can. He gets a good long nursing session in after the days that he spends in daycare and he's in need of extra cuddles from mom. It's soothing to him after he falls and bumps himself or when he's having teething pain. It's still the most convenient way to feed him when we're traveling, especially on a plane! My seat will be the one that you DON'T hear screaming coming from.


At the same time, he's increasing his solids, and it's nice for my boobs to be "off duty" more often. I don't think I'll be too broken up when he weans, but I'm in no rush, either. It'll happen when it happens.

post #39 of 41

At one, both my children still needed breastfeeding very much and it would definitely seemed wrong to stop (they were basically just really starting to get into solids). At two, we just kept going, same at three. My older one breastfed till 4/4.5 with a slow weaning process. My younger one still enjoys it.

post #40 of 41

I would NEVER take away such an important source of comfort and nutrition for my children without their consent! I owe it to them to give them the most secure, loving, happy childhood that I can. After all, they did not choose to be brought into this life. My DS weaned at 5.5, DDs are still nursing. It doesn't matter how old they are, they can always nurse from me, even if they've been "weaned" for a long time. 

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