Excitement at a minimum... « Back to Group Discussions

[macoymom]

For any of you to ever lose a baby you know how hard it is to be pg again!

Granted I'm expecting my 8th for the fourth time, in reality I've been pg 13 times now and the coming weeks are a waiting game. Even so I'm EXTREMELY THANKFUL for my 7 children and eager to know if indeed I will again hold a baby, my last baby, in April!

[babycatcher12]

I know how you feel. I have lost 2 babies in the 2nd trimester in the last 6 months. It is hard to be super excited because I face the coming weeks with great trepidation and wonder too, if I will hold a live baby in my arms in April. I am hopeful, but no longer go into pregnancy thinking there is a "safe" point or with the same innocence of never knowing the pain of losing a child. I wonder at times, if I will ever be able to let my guard down and enjoy it. 

[thecoffeebean]

I hear you guys! I have had four losses in the past 13 months- and I'm hoping this one sticks around so I don't have to make that "five losses in a row". I absolutely HATE that I've announced my pregnancy five times now to my good friends, as I can just see the tiredness in their eyes. They're afraid, too, so they're not even that outwardly excited this time around. I guess that's the tough part about RPL for me. A positive pregnancy test doesn't really mean much to us anymore. In fact, if I'm holding my baby in April, I will be genuinely shocked. Happy shocked, but shocked. I wish I could muster some more excitement, but in my mind I just can't go there.

(((Hugs))) to all the mamas here who can relate. It's tough!

[at_the_hip]

I'm super nervous too.  I've had 2 miscarriages and it just steals the innocence, doesn't it?  I'm afraid to get my hopes up, afraid to tell people, worried that I have had very little m/s so far (just 5 weeks...I know it's early but still).  I take my temp every morning still and am still testing to watch the lines get darker.  It's sad considering how little I am in control (however hard I try to fool myself) but I am praying that God will bless us with a healthy pg, baby and beyond!  I pray that same for you.

[babycatcher12]

Cindy I'm still temping too. If I hadn't just packed all my pregnancy tests (we're moving in 9 days) I would be taking them every day too. I haven't had much m/s and know that it's early, but am seriously thankful for the bit of nausea I have when I open a jar of peanut butter. I'm seriously considering sniffing it every morning to make sure I still feel ick when I do it. :)

And I agree. It's hard knowing that no matter what we do, we're still not in control. I can do everything "just right" and do what I'm supposed to do, take my vitamins, eat right, and still have a loss...it's happened the last two times. 

It just is what it is. We can do our best to give our babies the best place to grow and be and pray that in April we will get to hold them. I just long to be able to have a carefree pregnancy. We saw a heartbeat on Tuesday, but also found a SCH 3cm long and 1cm deep. So now I wonder if my baby is still safe. I just want to be NORMAL!

[OrchideZ]

Babycatcher: Sorry to hear you have had some losses. What is an SCH? I am happy to hear you saw the heartbeat.

I am feeling tender myself. I just experienced an early loss (1st tri) the first week of July and then was surprised to find myself pregnant again before I even got my period. I want to be excited but am scared...have my first OB appt a week from Friday when I will be 7 wks. 4 days. I just want to see the heartbeat!

[OrchideZ]

And hugs to Macoy, Coffeebean and Cindy too. 

[babycatcher12]

OrchideZ SCH = Subchorionic hemorrhage. Which is basically a bleed behind the placenta. 

[at_the_hip]

yeah I am cramping and spotting today and not feeling very hopeful.  :(  My successful pgs never had bleeding.  I guess I will wait it out since I am not even 6 weeks...unless I have too much pain?

[thecoffeebean]

At_the_hip, I've been spotting too. :-( I hate this part- the waiting is just unbearable. I'm sending up thoughts and prayers that everything is okay with your little bean!

[at_the_hip]

thecoffeebean, I'm sorry you've had spotting too!  I am waiting to go to the Dr in an hour.  I had a big gush of red bleeding yesterday (with all the cramping) but then it tapered off to brown and now nothing.  I'm still feeling crampy but not like yesterday.  So basically I have no idea what is going on.  My temp went up .3 over all of my previous temps today...I don't know if that is good or bad either.  I still feel pretty nauseated some of the time.  I'm not really expecting a whole lot of answers today.  Maybe they will order serial blood and an u/s to make sure it is in my uterus.  I know it is too early for a HB so it is pretty much a waiting game I imagine.  :(  I suppose I will prepare myself for the worst but there's a chance I might be surprised.

[at_the_hip]

I had my Dr's appointment and he basically said I may have had a miscarriage.  He wants an u/s to check.  I called around and they were like, sorry all we have are September appointments.  WHAT?!  Even the private clinic didn't have an opening until near the end of Aug.  We ended up having to call and have the Dr make the appointment for us, so now it will be on Saturday. 

[thecoffeebean]

Did they order bloodwork? How very frustrating!! I am glad that they were able to get you in on Saturday, though. How far along will you be then?

[firespiritmelody]

Hoping you hear good news this weekend!!

[at_the_hip]

I will be 5w6d on Saturday...no blood work. 

[alaskanmomma]

I had a m/c in June, so this pregnancy for now, isn't very exciting.. I'm just kinda waiting around for the m/c to happen again :\ 

[MomInTheMitten]

I had a m/c Just after weaning DS1, now, pregnant after just having weaned DS2, I'm feeling like we're pressing our luck. I felt great on Tuesday... Too great... So I took a beta hcg and again on Thursday. I'm waiting for my midwife to call with the results any minute.

It's hard isn't it, Alaskan? Feeling any different today Hip?

[at_the_hip]

I didn't sleep much last night...kept waking up thinking I was bleeding again but it could just be stress.  I am still having some cramping and back pain but no bleeding at all. 

Here they will tell you what is going on at the u/s if they see something good...but if they see anything suspect they won't say a word.  It is pretty nerve wracking and I remember my u/s with the last m/c.  I am trying not to get my hopes up but it seems a good sign that I am not bleeding, my temp is still up, hpt is still dark and am nauseated still. 

[TIFF4NY]

Originally Posted by at_the_hip 

I didn't sleep much last night...kept waking up thinking I was bleeding again but it could just be stress.  I am still having some cramping and back pain but no bleeding at all. 

Here they will tell you what is going on at the u/s if they see something good...but if they see anything suspect they won't say a word.  It is pretty nerve wracking and I remember my u/s with the last m/c.  I am trying not to get my hopes up but it seems a good sign that I am not bleeding, my temp is still up, hpt is still dark and am nauseated still. 

I'm definitely keeping positive thoughts for you. Hoping you get great news!

[MomInTheMitten]

Well my mw called... Hcg looks healthy and progesterone is at 13 at 5.5 wks (apparently it should be 15 by 7 or 8 weeks ). We talked through it and decided on starting on progesterone (even though my low reading could be low because it is still early). I haven't done my research yet. Any opinions?