Help me with my daily rhythm (or lack there of)... 4 year old and 2 year old

[Chloe'sMama]

Hi there-

I have 2 girls (4 and almost 2) and am 14 weeks pregnant.  I find myself slipping out of any rhythm that I may have had.  I spend my time trying to get the girls to play, while I am either reading, checking email, or on mothering..... I don't want to be that kind of mom.  We had a good rhythm going on this past spring, but now, it is HOT and I don't want to go outside or go to the park.... I am planning on homeschooling next year, but my DH has doubts about whether I can do it since my day is so chaotic as it is. 

I really think it would help us out to have some sort of schedule and daily rhythm at this point.  DD2 loves to do circle time, but I don't really do it more than 1-2 days a week.  

So, those with little ones... what does your day look like?

We have a scheduled playdate on Friday mornings and Wednesday morning a gymnastics class for both girls.... other than that, we are open and would love to have something more concrete to help us.  

Thanks in advance for any tips!

[UnderTheOldOakTree]

No real tips, but I sympathize.  I'm now in my third trimester and things are getting better, but for the first trimester especially, I just was not able to keep our rhythm up by any means.  I was scattered, and exhausted and sick and it just wasn't happening.  I tried to keep to a few weekly commitments for my son, (our playgroup and parent-child class) and so those gave our week some structure, but it was harder at home.  Largely, after talking to my son's teacher, I just decided that I had to let our strong rhythm go a little bit and not beat myself up about it.  I tried to limit my computer usage most days and I realized that we fell into a new more relaxed rhythm.  I focused on basics.  Meals, sleep rhythms etc, and the rest of the time I let myself knit and rest. I figured if I was at least knitting away I was doing something productive rather than just spending time online. If I kept that on a daily basis, DS mostly just played and spent time cuddling with me on the sofa.  I really was just in no shape to do much more than that (and later found out I had some complications that had made my first trimester especially hard).

As I moved into my second trimester I was able to start doing a little more.  I think we largely focused on incorporating regular tiddying-up times back into our day for a while.  Now, somehow  (I know this isn't entirely typical) in my third trimester I feel better and have more energy than I've had since before I was pregnant so I am managing to do more things with him and keep our rhythm much stronger.  We're back to having a day when we bake and days when we do certain other activities around the house each week.  I'm not into the outdoor activities unless it's an especially cool day while pregnant during the summer. It's just too much for me.  I have encouraged DH to spend more time with DS outside in the evenings and on weekends to try to make up for that.

Hope that helps some.  I really think, especially in pregnancy mom's sometimes just need to give themselves permission to rest...your body's doing quite a lot of work....and put some focus on your own self-care even when that means you can't do all of the things you really want to do with your little ones. Honestly, I'm not entirely expecting things to get entirely back to normal till after this baby comes and starts to settle into our new family rhythm.

[tiqa]

I'm 17-ish weeks pregnant and my rhythm consists of laying in bed feeling sorry for my headache / morning sickness / ailment of the day.  I am not a happy pregnant lady.  However, on my good days I set up their playroom as much as I could and took away 99% of their toys, sorted into category bins.  (Puzzle type things, blocks, car play, etc.)  I have a basket of picture books as well.  In the morning we have a very easy breakfast (like cereal) and do one or two minor chores.  Then I lay around the couch and watch them play on the patio while it's still cool.  Then we make some super easy recipe inside.  Then I lay around (more like wallow) some more while they color.  We (i.e. they) have lunch.  Then we read some books.  Then when they're about to get restless I take out a bin and they are totally distracted while I can (yet again) lay on the couch.  I try to distract myself with some hand craft like sewing - it's not really more productive than the Internet but I find myself more snappish if I'm distracted by mothering or a good blog - so I try to leave my laptop for after they're asleep.  So then we'll have dinner, then they take a bath, then bed.  Then I read a bit or go online and take my own bath and fall asleep early.  Am I being supermom?  No.  Are they reasonably content?  Yeah, I guess.  This is a rough season of life for me healthwise, but hopefully we'll weather it.  I'm hoping fall brings some relief, though.  Even to be able to open all the windows in the house and get that fall smell in... I can't wait.  I'm definitely stir crazy.