Breastfeeding Support - Page 2 « Back to Group Discussions

[iixivboots]

eleuthia, I'm glad you go the tongue tie diagnosed and taken care of so quickly! I hope things continue to improve.

Lily, thanks for your supportive words. I totally found the same thing about everyone having a different opinion about breastfeeding. It honestly makes me not want to ask for help which I know is bad. Thanks for sharing your own challenges with us, it does help to know that not everyone is a "natural" at this and especially after a hospital stay things can be kind of confusing. In other news, Welcome home, Piper! I am so happy for you guys. It's so special to have your little one in your native environment, although a bit freaky at times! :) I never mentioned how much I love her nursery, but you know I do :)

I'm sorry you're dealing with pain and a possible plugged duct, I hope you can get some good care and consistent advice for dealing with this!

Liz, you are kind of spot on, I think, about comfort sucking. While I do think there was some cluster feeding and Lyle getting used to not eating every two hours, I also think he just needed to nurse and comfort suck. Although I had a lot of reservations, we did end up giving him a pacifier during these freak outs where nothing else seems to work, that did work. I was against it because I didn't want anything else involved in this nursing relationship when he's so little and we have already had bottles, but at the same time we gave him a pacifier when he was under the billi lights to keep him calm and I felt the situation called for it. We are definitely not going to be using one all the time and I know it's controversial, but I feel like the calm that it gives him and our household will ultimately help us keep breastfeedfing, not the opposite.

Thanks for all your experiences and support!

Here's our update:

Lyle has still been latching awesomely since we started using cradle hold, and I hold him a lot more firmly and securely now, which I think helps. (Before my milk came in, I was sidelying, but I had trouble with that once the boobs got bigger, then we were doing football but it just wasn't working as well) I am so relieved by this, I was really worried the bottles had taught him bad habits. He had the same crazy fussy period last night (around this time, I am gearing up for it!) but then nursed so well at 3 a.m. and 6 a.m. It was very peaceful and I felt good about it. I didn't pump today except to empty one breast that was leaking after he had fed. I still am trying to encourage a bit more supply by pumping and hopefully I'm not overdoing it. I need to do more research about supply and pumping, etc, especially since I will eventually be going back to work full time. Overall I'm feeling a bit more zen about things, like if it takes pumping, a pacifier, and even a dreaded bottle of formula or two to get us all settled into nursing this little guy, it will all be worth it in the end. While it's true that many people have strong opinions about how to do things and what is good and what is absolutely evil when caring for a child, honestly the worst judgments were the ones I was imposing on myself.

Did I tell you guys he is gaining awesomely? He was up to 8 lbs 12 oz (6 oz above birth weight at 2 weeks) at his appointment Friday. (At the worst of the jaundice he was down to 7 .10 ) That is from a week of mostly breastfeeding, so we're feeling good he's getting what he needs. Trying to keep the faith we'll get his night time issues figured out too.

[LilyTiger]

Boots, that's awesome news!  We've been using a pacifier a little here and there too, mostly because she got one in the NICU and when I hand her off to DH he needs something to calm her.  Mostly though, she's just always at the boob.  It's a little exhausting.  But congrats on the weight gain!  That's the best indicator that whatever you're doing is working, in my opinion.

My post from yesterday basically needs to be flipped.  The plugged duct appears to be unplugged after massive amounts of nursing on that boob and some Dr. Sears massage techniques.  The sore nipple is feeling better, but now she won't latch at all on that side.  I think some of the soreness and such was actually keeping the nipple more available for her so it was easier to latch.  We'll work through it. I wish I had an idea of how long it might take to transition from this shield.  I'm thinking it might be weeks at this rate. 

[CCoello]

I have had a few small lumps on my left side for a week or more. It's no more sore than my right side, and it definitely is producing A LOT of milk, but the lumps won't budge, despite heat, massage, etc...

I don't know whether to stress about them or assume they aren't a problem until they are a problem!
 

[rebecca10]

Great news Boots! It sounds like you've really got everything on track. You are definitely not alone in having a rough start.  Pretty much every first time mom I know did, and then suddenly it all just sort of clicks for almost everyone and by 2-3 months it feels like second nature.  I totally feel you on the how much advice to take department. The thing is even among professionals, not all advice is equal and even generally good advice may not be the right for your particular situation. I got terrible advice from a lacation consultant with my first, which lead to a week of unhappy baby, unhappy mom, and no weight gain at all.  I decided at that point just to go with what felt right to me  and after that it was smooth sailing. So while there is definitely tons of value in asking for help, I  wouldn't be afraid to go with your own mother's intuition too if that feels right, especially if the baby's gaining well, and you've got the basic mechanics of lactch and positioning reasonably well established. 

[eveningstarmom]

Lily so glad that Piper is home and nursing lots. In terms of getting her off the shield, it sounds like you are making good progress -- keep faith and she will be totally off it soon. With my first we had his tongue tie clipped at 10 days, and it was about 2 weeks before he was mostly off the shield during the day and another week or so before he was completely on the breast. It seemed like a really long time while it was happening, but now it just seems like a short blip. For me, there was a decent amount of nipple discomfort has I weaned off the shield, enough that I really had to grit my teeth through the initial latch, but that went away fairly quickly as well. One thing that worked well for me was to start a nursing session with the shield and then after let down, I would take the shield off and stick the nipple in his mouth as quickly as I could. Some days it would work and he would keep nursing without the shield, some days we had to go back to the shield because he couldn't manage to stay on. I think one of the reasons this helped is that starting with the shield would pull out my small nipples enough to help his small mouth/short tongue get a good hold.

Good luck getting the hang of it all, it will be second nature soon!

[Sol_y_Paz]

You are not alone in a rough start Boots!  It has been rough weeks here too getting the hang of it, took a long time for milk to come in, lots of lanolin creams, different positions, pain, so much outside help, and more pain.  The baby is great at latching it is me that is just having a rough time learning what works best.  I was told to look at diaper counts and also weight gain as indicators of if what you are doing work or not.  Everyone has a different opinion too, which is frustrating when not everyone agrees but sometimes I think that is because not every mom and baby is the same and so much depends on what works best for you and your baby.  

[LilyTiger]

eveningstarmom, that makes me feel so much better.  We seem to be following the same progression, interestingly.  She'll now take the left breast without the shield during the day (most of the time), and sometimes at night, but not always.  The other side is a lot more difficult, so we'll be playing around with bait and switch tactics and different holds on days that she's patient.  It's coming along slowly but surely, but you're totally right that in the moment it feels like it's taking forever.  And ultimately, her weight gain is good and she's happy and healthy, so the shield itself isn't a huge deal.  But I will be very very happy when we're off it and can nurse spontaneously.

[eleuthia]

LilyTiger, our shield use is kinda similar! I can sometimes go without on the left, and sometimes take it away on the right. But I'm not too worried about still using it. He's still getting the hang of things, and he gained 10 ounces from Thursday to today which means he's now above his birth weight so I really think using the shield has been a positive thing. Even if I'm soooo sick of washing the things (or having my partner do it) in the middle of the night, and I have 3 of them. 

[iixivboots]

Hi everyone, I'd love to hear updates from mamas and babies! :)

I just wanted to say thank you for all the support and personal experiences shared in this thread. It made me feel so much less alone, and was much more powerful to hear it from my DDC sisters than just on a random post in the breastfeeding forum.

Lyle and I continue to do well, but I still have the concern about supply and fussy evenings that I don't think the LC addressed. I am just not wanting to spend money on another visit right now. I may have to look into LLL or support groups or something. Overall he's just had one bottle of pumped milk but he was so inconsolable last night I was thinking about formula. But I trusted what I read on kellymom and nursed him even though he'd just nursed forever and my boobs felt empty and I couldn't express anything and lo and behold, he did get more. I wish I could feel the letdown, that would help my peace of mind a lot!

[1stTimeMama4-4-10]

I can't feel letdown either. It is definitely disconcerting.

[ilovetchotchkes]

The only time I do feel let down is when i do NOT have a baby on my breast- like, if she's crying i'll feel it and look down and sure enough, spots on my shirt. 

[LilyTiger]

Hey everyone!  I figured I'd update here and maybe get some perspective.  We're officially off the nipple shield (thank goodness), and weaning wasn't actually that bad in retrospect.  Once her latch got strong enough, she pretty much lost interest in the shield.  It might have helped that she doesn't like pacifiers or anything like that.  Just my boob.  Sigh.  As hard as it is to admit it, I can't say I love breastfeeding.  My letdown is incredibly painful (just for a second or two and then it's fine) and I had a mild breakdown the other night when she was super fussy and cluster feeding and nothing but having my boob in her mouth would calm her.  I basically cried to my husband that it's unfair that I'm the only one who can do this.  He feels really guilty a lot as a result.  I think it will be easier when I go back to work and he'll be able to do a night feeding or two because we'll have the pump and she'll be on a bottle somewhat anyway.  Mostly, though, things are going well.  I suppose the most frustrating part of the process is that Piper (like Lyle, it sounds like) gets fussy in the evenings and basically cluster feeds from 7pm to around midnight.  After that I get a good three hours of sleep (at least this has been the pattern the past few nights), but that initial lead up is exhausting and frustrating.  She also spits up if she's laid down horizontal, so we can't really do any dream feeding yet and more comfortable positions like side-lying are pretty much out unless I want to be covered in spit up. 

And Boots, the cluster feeding/evening fussiness is, as far as my research goes, a perfectly normal phase for newborns and a particularly frustrating one.  At least in our case the rampant cluster feeding gets me an extra hour or two of sleep, but it is super difficult to have her attached to the boob every fifteen minutes for a four hour or more period.  I'm hoping we grow out of this quickly, though I'm worried something worse might lie waiting in the wings.    At any rate, I've talked to my doula and a bunch of other moms who said they just put on some Netflix and tried to ride out the storm, which is what we're doing too.  And i keep reminding myself that we've only been doing this for two weeks.  We have a very long and hopefully rewarding BF relationship ahead of us.  Right now I'm not feeling the warm fuzzies, but I hope that comes later.

[eleuthia]

Oh, I am right there with you ladies on the frustrating cluster feedings in the evenings. We're off the nipple shield since Tuesday evening, which is great, but OMG it huuuuuuurts and I really dread having pretty much no break for my poor nipples. I'm honestly kind of scared of doing it all alone, which will happen Wed/Thur/Fri/Sat due to my partner's work schedule (and the last of my family heading back home). My sister really helped me through what I hope was the worst of it - helping me get him latched better, reminding me not to squeeze the baby's head, telling me it *does* get better, and even offering to breastfeed him if I really couldn't do it (she's here with her 14mo old, so we've often been sitting on the couch each feeding our babes). And my mom has told me that she would sometimes dread nursing and think "oh, do I really have to do this again??" in the early days, which makes me feel much less guilty about it. It's still tough, though! 

I did get some Soothies gel pads which seem to be helping a bit with the nipple pain. They're kind of a pain since you have to wipe the gel off the breast before each feeding, so I didn't keep them on at night, but hopefully they'll provide some relief this evening. 

[Veritas Vitae]

Breastfeeding is tricky!  I'm now on my third 24 hours, and we had a lot of trouble with my left nipple, it is inverted, and Q just wouldn't latch, she would try for a second, and then give up, and even though I kept offering her that breast first, she would get really frustrated, and then suck on her hands and cry until I moved her to my right breast (no fun in the middle of the night, and I feel horrible that she gets so upset), which she had no trouble latching onto.  I ended up using just my right breast to feed Q for this first day and a half, but since I was feeding so much on one breast, it is now painfully engorged. I got a breast shield yesterday, and she was able to immediately latch with that, so I guess I will try to start her transitioning from the shield to the nipple as the nipple hopefully pulls out more.  I've also started pumping on the left to  help bring in the milk.  I'm worried that she isn't getting the right amount of milk though because on day 1 we got 4 poopy diapers and I guess an equal amount of pee (I didn't change any of those diapers). Then at about 25 hours we got one more pee and poo, but she has only peed one more time since then, in the middle of last night, probably around 1 am...and no pee or poop since then.  I know she is technically only supposed to have one pee and poop on day 1, and two pees and poops on day 2, which she did (and more on the poop front) but shouldn't she have peed more by now?

[1stTimeMama4-4-10]

VV, if you are concerned, I HIGHLY recommend that you contact a good LC and have them cone to your hone and weigh baby before and after a feeding to. see how much that are really getting. Is your milk fully in? If not, I don't think you can get any accurate measurement of what baby is getting yet. Once your milk is in I would expect many more wet and dirty dipes, but ob the first few days baby doesn't NEED much because their bodies are prepared to go a few days just on colostrum.

As far as it getting better, I can only share my experience, which was that everything relayed to breastfeeding for the first few weeks was awful. I had no confidence, DD and I weren't getting the hang of it, and it was INCREDIBLY anxiety provoking. And then it wasn't. At 2-4 weeks in, it became a source of joy and pride and bonding. We are still nursing nearly 2 1/2 years later despite the fact that my milk dried up 6 months ago. I'm scared of what tandem nursing will bring, but I cannot bear the thought of weaning DD yet. It is still so so special to her and I feel so deeply blessed that we made it through those first few weeks because truly, it is pretty much the single most rewarding experience of parenthood thus far. There are very few things that I know beyond the shadow of a doubt that I am definitely doing right when it comes to parenting. Breastfeeding is one of them.

[rebecca10]

Originally Posted by 1stTimeMama4-4-10 

VV, if you are concerned, I HIGHLY recommend that you contact a good LC and have them cone to your hone and weigh baby before and after a feeding to. see how much that are really getting. Is your milk fully in? If not, I don't think you can get any accurate measurement of what baby is getting yet. Once your milk is in I would expect many more wet and dirty dipes, but ob the first few days baby doesn't NEED much because their bodies are prepared to go a few days just on colostrum.
As far as it getting better, I can only share my experience, which was that everything relayed to breastfeeding for the first few weeks was awful. I had no confidence, DD and I weren't getting the hang of it, and it was INCREDIBLY anxiety provoking. And then it wasn't. At 2-4 weeks in, it became a source of joy and pride and bonding. We are still nursing nearly 2 1/2 years later despite the fact that my milk dried up 6 months ago. I'm scared of what tandem nursing will bring, but I cannot bear the thought of weaning DD yet. It is still so so special to her and I feel so deeply blessed that we made it through those first few weeks because truly, it is pretty much the single most rewarding experience of parenthood thus far. There are very few things that I know beyond the shadow of a doubt that I am definitely doing right when it comes to parenting. Breastfeeding is one of them.

This!   I'm in the same place as 1stTimeMama, right down to getting ready to tandem nurse with my 2 1/2 year old, and for me too it got so much easier and amazingly more rewarding after the first month or so.  Sending lots of good breastfeeding vibes to all of you and hoping things are easier before you know it!

[Sol_y_Paz]

Speaking of milk coming in - mine didn't come in for a full five days. 

[eleuthia]

I don't know what happened but sometime Monday, Calder stopped latching correctly. He won't stick his tongue out and instead kinda flips it up which means I can't get my nipple in his mouth. So we're using the nipple shields again, since they will slide in over his tongue. I'm not too upset in the short term since it hurts a whole lot less with the shields, but I'm concerned about him regressing. I don't think the tongue tie is growing back but I'm not sure how I'd tell.

I'm feeling some anxiety because my partner's sister, brother in law & 3yr old nephew are coming here on Sunday for 5 days. I can't exactly breastfeed discreetly at all yet, and I'm spending lots of time on it, which means I guess I'll have to go up to our bedroom every time. The couch is much more comfortable but I'm just not into having my breast hanging out in front of a guy I met once three years ago. I imagine my partner will probably go out with them during the day, so I'll get some private time out of the bedroom, but then I'll also be home alone which effing SUCKS right now.

[mtngirl81]

Is there a way to possibly increase my milk supply? It doesn't seem like Kenzie's getting much of it... I'd pump but not sure when to pump as I don't want to NOT have milk for when she needs to nurse.  I'm a total newbie at this!!!

[andaluza]

Originally Posted by mtngirl81 

Is there a way to possibly increase my milk supply? It doesn't seem like Kenzie's getting much of it... I'd pump but not sure when to pump as I don't want to NOT have milk for when she needs to nurse.  I'm a total newbie at this!!!

I've been drinking Traditional Medicinals' Organic Mother's milk tea and don't know if it's what helped or not, but the lactation consultants in the hospital had me convinced (Sat am) that I would not be making milk anytime soon. Only to find that it was coming in Sunday pm and I had super-inflated boobs when I woke up Monday and they've been full on demand ever since.