Breastfeeding Support - Page 4 « Back to Group Discussions

[mtngirl81]

VV, Boots, LilyTiger thanks for sharing your words and experiences... It does seem like I have plenty of milk.  I've resorted to pumping and giving Miss K bottles in addition to nursing her as I was becoming quite miserable and bitter towards the act of breastfeeding. I can't explain why I feel this way... just really dislike it :-( I hope that I get over it as it's been nearly 3 weeks now.  

Sol - I'd totally eat oatmeal everyday if I could as I LOVE it but I have a gluten intolerance and eating it makes for some 'unpleasant' reactions. 

[sarahdb]

I'm so thankful for this thread. The last few days have been really awful. I posted in the slow nursing thread about little Elodie liking to nurse all day long. I thought that meant she was getting plenty to eat, but that it just took her a little longer because of her tight jaw and trouble latching. Anyway, at the 2-week visit this past Wednesday, the midwife discovered that she hadn't gained any weight at all in the previous week. My heart just sank and I spent the rest of the evening bawling. I felt like I was failing her somehow, and I just felt awful for her. Like I was starving my own child. It's a good thing my mom is here right now, because I felt myself going into an emotional, sleep-deprived-induced downward spiral into a really dark place.

The next day we went for a second visit to a lactation specialist. She deduced that Elodie's shallow latch is the big culprit in the whole situation, and the fact that I've been using a nipple shield on my bloody blistered nipples was a huge factor in her trouble with latching. As a result, she's been getting too much foremilk and not enough hindmilk, and thus not putting on any weight. So now we're on a strict schedule of nursing on each side for 10 minutes, and then 15 minutes of pumping (using a hospital-grade pump) and giving her the pumped milk. We've only been doing it for 24 hours at this point, but I think she seems more content already. So NewMumJoy, I am totally feeling you on the schedule thing and the way it takes over your life. I never imagined breastfeeding would be this difficult or complicated.

I am feeling sad because 20 minutes of nursing every 3 hours doesn't actually feel like that much. I miss having Elodie so close the rest of the time. To make things worse, as I mentioned in the weekly chat, my MIL is here this weekend, and is pretty much hogging Elodie to herself. It is awkward all around. Of course she is a big fan of this new strict 3-hour schedule we're on now. And she mentioned to me a number of times already, "She really needs to put on weight. I really hope there's nothing that's getting damaged developmentally by this." Yeah--thanks for your encouragement--and putting weight on her is our top priority right now!!!!!!!!!!! I am just feeling annoyed because she isn't doing anything to help around the house--she's only here to hold Elodie. To make it even worse, my MIL gets on my mom's nerves, so there is tension in the house.

Sorry for the rant. I am just feeling even more frazzled and emotional than I already was.  I am so ready for life to feel a little more normal.

Hope everyone else's situations are continuing to improve!

[iixivboots]

Sarah, I just wanted to offer you some virtual hugs! I totally felt guilty and terrible and like a failure when Lyle lost weight the first week, and had to be supplemented. I totally get you, I was going to a dark place, too.  We went through the scheduled feedings too but at some point soon you will be released from them as soon as she puts on weight again. It sucks, though, no question. Hope you guys get through it quickly.

One thing this thread has taught me (besides reiterating how awesome this DDC is) is that these issues are common and no matter how much you educate yourself before your LO is born, we don't live in a breastfeeding culture and all of this still takes us by surprise. Lyle is a month old now and those scheduled feedings seem like they were ages ago! You'll get through it.

[Tizzy]

Oh Sarah, I'm so sorry you've got this added stress right now. That's great that the LC has given you advice to help you and Elodie through! No matter how hard you try, there will always be challenges.

I'm a little annoyed here, I was slacking off and not paying attention to latching as well as dealing with a bit of thrush (from those abx of course!) And now I have cracked and blistered nipples. So not cool!!
Bad enough that I dug out the lanolin and plan to find some EMAB cream or Something today! I only had some blisters in the first days before my milk came in with my first child so this is unexpected and somewhat insulting lol

[mtngirl81]

Thinking of you Sarah... hope you can get through the weekend with your MIL and have your sanity still intact... Mine's coming in a couple weeks and i'm SO dreading it too.  She used to be a maternity ward nurse and has her own ideas of how to do things. Fun! 

[FeralFox]

Sarah, hang in there, it will get better!  Once you get over the hump with weight gain, nursing will get a little more back to normal, and you can concentrate more on getting her latched well.  I went through something very similar with my son, so I know how frustrating it is, and I understand the self blame.  But it *will* get better.  By three months, you'll be doing great and this will just be a memory.  I'm sorry your MIL is such a PITA about it.  I hope she goes home soon.

[Veritas Vitae]

Hugs, Sarah, that sounds tough, I'm sorry you have to deal with it.

[Sol_y_Paz]

Just wanted to say this forum has helped me a lot

http://forums.llli.org/forumdisplay.php?111-Breastfeeding-Your-Newborn-(0-3-months)

And this also helped me 

http://www.nbci.ca/index.php?option=com_content&view=article&id=29:protocol-to-manage-breastmilk-intake&catid=5:information&Itemid=17

Edited by Sol_y_Paz - 9/2/12 at 7:01pm

[Sol_y_Paz]

Sarah 

 eleuthia

So glad to hear that your mom and sisters were so helpful and so supportive!! That is so wonderful!  Very glad to hear it.  It was hardest for me for those who meant well and had good intentions but were not supportive of nursing and had things to say such as why don't you try formula, you probably don't have enough milk if baby is eating so much, let baby cry it out and oth

I had three plugged ducts on one side, what worked for me was tynenol, hot showers, and letting DS eat off that side as much as possible despite the pain.  

Edited by Sol_y_Paz - 9/3/12 at 6:38pm

[Sol_y_Paz]

 mtngirl81 
If oatmeal is out I found this http://kellymom.com/bf/can-i-breastfeed/herbs/herbal_galactagogue/

[iixivboots]

So Lyle and I have encountered another roadblock. Not as major as the first few weeks but I'm really getting frustrated and sad. For about two feedings a day, he rejects my left breast. During other feedings, especially those when he's very sleepy but actively nursing, he nurses on this breast just fine.

He will latch on the left boob, then he seems to stop breathing, turn red, come off and cry. I thought it might be overactive letdown (I noticed it after I was slightly engorged one day and pumped a ton out of that breast) but he just did it and he had already nursed some (in fits and starts) and I wasn't able to hand express or pump out too much. (I got 15 ml with the hospital pump, but I did notice some of it sprayed rather forcefully) I don't know.  Then at times I think he acts this way between letdowns when he's getting nothing. I'm frustrated because I feel like it's just his preference for the other breast and when he's too tired to care, it's not an issue. I have an uneven supply now, last night he had pumped milk we needed to use up and I pumped, and I got almost 2.5 oz out of the left and 50 ml from the right.

He tends to feed better from the right if I offer it first, today for example the left was so engorged I wanted him to take that first, by the time he got to the right he was sucking less actively and then got fussy.

I'm so worried it's going to start happening more. Also during his fussy time of the evening, he will do this with both breasts. I've also thought at some point he wasn't actually hungry anymore and just wanted to comfort suck, latched on and got milk and didn't like that. I don't know. Any thoughts or theories on this would help!

Sol, I'm getting great info from both those links, thank you!

[sallyrae17]

Boots - I have overactive/forceful letdown and my daughter gasps and pulls off of my breast frequently. She also projectile vomits (she's getting too much milk for her small tummy) and is super gassy. Does Lyle have any of these symptoms as well? Both of my breasts are about the same, milk-wise, and it seems like she'll prefer one breast to the other at random times. I think that I'll want her to finish nursing on one breast to get the hind milk, when she really wants the foremilk on the other breast. I also think she can tell the difference between each nipple. The breast that is fuller obviously has a different texture than the one that is almost empty. Maybe Lyle is doing the same thing? This is my second time around breastfeeding, but my little girl is way different than my son. In other words, I'm trying to figure things out as well. It generally takes about six weeks to feel confident and really establish your breastfeeding regiment the first time around (at least, in my experience). So, don't give up. You're at the one month mark and you have been doing a great job with all of your roadblocks!!! You can do this!

[LilyTiger]

ARGH!  The past few days have been a little rough.  I have ridiculously painful letdown.  Like toe-curling pain.  Added to that is that I've been sort of lazy about Piper's latch and so when she gets tired I've been sort of letting her drag my nipples down, which has led to some serious nipple pain.  And finally, I have a weird red rash-like thing around both breasts (not on the areola or nipples) that itches slightly.  I don't have a fever or any other signs of mastitis and I don't seem to have any plugged ducts (that I can feel, at any rate).  So I've just started doing everything in the book to try to alleviate the various symptoms.  I massage before and during feedings (just in case something is plugged that I don't know about) and I've been obsessively using coconut oil on the breasts and EMAB on my nipples to try to help that problem (along with letting milk dry on the breasts after each feeding).  I've also been correcting her latch when I notice she's getting lazy and I try to change nursing positions frequently (side lying, football hold, etc.).  I'm hoping that all of this helps the nipple pain and the letdown issue (if anything can be done about that).  It's just frustrating hearing that nursing shouldn't hurt when every time she latches on the first five seconds or so feel like my entire breast is being shot through a meat grinder.  Then it's fine.  Super super annoying.

I do have a question though if anyone might know...  Her latch looks good overall, though I've read that "lipstick shaped" nipples is a sign of a poor latch.  Do they mean sort of pressed together (like a flattened circle if you're looking at them from above) or is there like a point like in some lipstick?  I guess I just don't know exactly what kind of lipstick we're talking about here.  If it's the former, we definitely have some of that going on, particularly when she's tired.  So I'll need to work on correcting it more consistently.

Sorry this post is sort of all over the place.  We've been running around all weekend so this is the first opportunity I've had to vent in a few days.

[eleuthia]

Originally Posted by LilyTiger 

\It's just frustrating hearing that nursing shouldn't hurt when every time she latches on the first five seconds or so feel like my entire breast is being shot through a meat grinder.  Then it's fine.  Super super annoying.

Same here! There are times when he's opening wide and instead of shoving my breast in his mouth like I should, I hesitate or pull back because I just don't want to feel that pain! I really hope it's a temporary thing for both of us. 

I have the same question about "lipstick-shaped." Like in this image http://www.covergirl.com/images/common/tips/lip_tips/lipstick_shape.jpg mine look like the middle shape after nursing, but I think of the shape on the right when I think of lipstick. 

[LilyTiger]

Originally Posted by eleuthia 

I have the same question about "lipstick-shaped." Like in this image http://www.covergirl.com/images/common/tips/lip_tips/lipstick_shape.jpg mine look like the middle shape after nursing, but I think of the shape on the right when I think of lipstick. 

Yes!  Thank you for clarifying!  I was trying to figure out how to describe it but totally couldn't.  The middle one is what mine look like sometimes.  And I totally hear you on the pulling away during latch on.  In the middle of the night especially it's really hard to inflict that on yourself if you're not quite mentally prepared.  Everything I've read says that it gets better, but it can take a few months.     I hope both of us get some relief sooner rather than later.

[Sol_y_Paz]

I also have an extremely painful let down.  I thought it was related to vasospasm in some way.  Sometimes even thinking about my LO equals pain or hearing him cry.  

Edited by Sol_y_Paz - 9/4/12 at 9:22pm

[Tizzy]

I've always had a painful letdown, even 6mo in when walking through a store. Ack! Or right now just typing about it lol!

The meat grinder feeling with a bit of a rash sounds like mild thrush (im currently dealing with the same thing). Diligence with wiping with ACV before and after each feeding works well, sure stings though!

[sarahdb]

Just wanted to pop in to say thanks to everyone SO much for your support and empathy. We've made it through the weekend with our new 3-hour feeding schedule. We took Elodie to get weighed again today, and she had put on 3 oz. in 3 days. So as much as I dislike the idea of such a strict schedule, I'm so relieved and happy that things are headed in the right direction. Of course, we still have to work on her latch, which I am dreading, but I'm finally seeing that we'll get through this, and that there's a light at the end of the tunnel.

I'm very happy that my MIL is leaving early in the morning too. It was a really emotionally challenging weekend, and I ended up sequestering myself to the bedroom for all the nursing and pumping sessions because I was starting to feel claustrophobic from all her hovering, staring, commenting and questioning while I nursed. I feel so possessive of Elodie--like I just don't want to share her yet. It was extremely hard for me not to constantly want to take her back from my MIL. When she left, my MIL declared that Elodie is doing so much better now than she was when she (my MIL) arrived on Friday. In other words, it felt like she was accusing us (me) of not taking proper care of her--or that's what it felt like. I mean, I know that it wasn't a good situation and we needed a solution, but I was already feeling so much guilt, and comments like that just make it harder.

In the future, I will not allow any visitors before at least a month, I think! (besides my own mom who is truly here to help out)

Really feeling and sympathizing for those who are still struggling with breastfeeding issues. We're not out of the woods yet either, and I imagine I'll continue to read this thread regularly. Hugs of support to all! 

[NewMumJoy]

Sarah - glad to hear you're hanging in there and that Elodie is already gaining weight, yayy!!  Early on, a different LC (who was filling in for the weekend) told me to keep baby on the breast for as long as he wanted - so I let him nurse for an hour and a half on average each time, thinking that he was going to gain a ton by his next weigh-in.  Unfortunately he didn't gain any weight - and I felt the same utter disappointment that you did, wondering how on earth did I fail him!  My original LC returned and explained that b/c my supply was still low (and his latch was bad) baby was actually burning too much energy spending so much time trying to nurse (for all those extra hours that I thought were doing him good!).... and thus she gave me the 10 minute limit per side (plus supplementing) to conserve his energy.  It did work, as he steadily gained over the next few days.  Now I'm able to spread out his feedings to 3-4 hours.  ......Are you still pumping?  And how are you feeding the pumped milk to Elodie?  

And, I TOTALLY get what you were going through w/your MIL visiting!  Ugh, so sorry for you!! Fortunately you survived the w/e and have the house and baby back to yourself!  Although my inlaws were helpful in some ways (like w/meals & errands - desperately needed while recovering from surgery), I had a really hard time w/MIL constantly taking the baby and then gushing about how soothed and content he was in her arms (all the while as he screamed and fought w/me during every single feeding).  Hard enough that I had to give him up so often since I had to pump, pump, pump....   On top of that, I had to hear how she "never had such problems w/breastfeeding, in fact there was too much milk!".... and similar comparisons of her 4 natural births vs. my c-section....

LilyTiger - love your meat grinder reference / hate that it rings so true!!  I also have a rash on my breasts (not nipple or areola) over the past couple of days.  I tend to think that the irritation is from my milk, because I have the same little itchy red bumps on my forearms and wrists - where the milk would drip on when I'm feeding or pumping (and I'm getting milk all over myself these days!)  I've been washing up w/hot water afterwards now.... I'm a little nervous to see what this rash develops into over the next few days, as it's spreading and getting uncomfortable.

William's latch completely SUCKS right now, and is painful as all hell (toe curling - yes!!).... but at this point, I'm just trying to get him on my boob at all.  Good news is that b/c he's screaming so much now, he can get the whole nipple in (unlike the first couple weeks).... bad news is that, well, he's screaming so much.....

[Veritas Vitae]

*nak

Good for you, Joy, this must all be so hard for you, big hugs for persevering.

Sol, I had to look up vaspospasm. Is your vaspospasm related to Reynaud's at all? I only ask because I have issues with Reynaud's, but it hasn't manifested in my nipples. So sorry, mama.

Sarah, i empathize with the feeling very possessive. I even feel that way with B sometimes, he is in heaven because he can comfort Q with a pacifier once she is fed, and he does all the diapers/clothing changes so he gets to provide for her as well, and I can tell he is a bit jealous of the nursing relationship I get to have with Q, but even still, I'm like, argh, I want my baby...I think she has to eat....

I have lipstick nipple #2 from the picture on my right nipple after Q eats, but it isn't painful, so I guess it is okay. I'm still having to use the nipple shield most of the time on the left nipple. But still mostly painful upon latching.