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First strong kicks when?

Poll Results: Not counting first pregnancies, when did you notice strong kicks?

This is a multiple choice poll
  • 12% (2)
    14w or less
  • 12% (2)
    15w
  • 25% (4)
    16w
  • 6% (1)
    17w
  • 18% (3)
    18w
  • 18% (3)
    19w
  • 6% (1)
    20w or more
16 Total Votes  
post #1 of 15
Thread Starter 

I had a midwife tell me something strange yesterday. She said the first strong kicks are always at about 16 weeks, at least with non first time pregnancies. Small occasional wiggles since what seems to be 14.5w don't count, small frequent wiggles since 17w don't count. If I don't feel any really strong kicks I'm not 18 weeks along. I thought there was actually a lot of variance in when things were felt, based on placenta location, mom's muscle and fat, etc? I can't remember when exactly I felt it in my previous ones, pretty sure by 20 weeks with my first, no idea with my second.

 

Also, she's a very experienced midwife, if you disagreed on this how wary might that make you of listening to her otherwise?

post #2 of 15

I don't remember when I felt "for sure" kicks with babies 1 & 2, but I was around 18 weeks when I was 100% positive what I was feeling was baby and not gas or anything else with #3. I'm pretty sure it was a little bit sooner with #2 but I'm not positive.

post #3 of 15

If I don't feel any really strong kicks I'm not 18 weeks along.

 

headscratch.gif

 

Uh...  That makes no sense, at least not if taken anywhere close to literally.  And it hits one of my major pet peeves, which is changing dates based on just about anything except one of the following:

 

-Charting

-IVF/etc.

-Maybe a very early (<9 weeks) u/s, especially in the absence of the first two

 

Now, if you are really fuzzy on your dates-- like REALLY fuzzy because you were BFing or your cycles are super-irregular and you weren't charting, and you have sex every day (or whatever), then sure, maybe you can adjust your dates by a week or so, based on other factors.  Especially if it's not legally (etc.) critical that you deliver in a certain place before or after X weeks, or whatever.  But otherwise...  This drives me up a wall when it's done with later u/s or fundal measurements-- let alone something so subjective and nebulous and variable as a "strong kick."

 

Just my thing-- I hate it when EDDs are moved because your 30-weeker is measuring like a 32-weeker or something.  We all know that LMP dating (and even dating from known ovulation) is not 100% accurate or applicable to all healthy pregnancies.  That's why any HCP worth their salt thinks of it as a due range, not a due date.

 

BUT.

 

LMP dating is what all the studies, all the info, and all the basis of comparison to others is based on.  It may not be perfect, but it's what we got.  It's how we know what chances your kid has for survival at 24 vs. 32 weeks.  That kind of thing.  It is fine to say your baby is measuring small/big or is developmentally slightly off the SMACK MIDDLE OF THE BELL CURVE.  That MAY have implications.

 

But it does not change the baby's age!

 

It's like if you have a child, who on her 4th birthday is the height of an average 5-year-old, the weight of a 3.5-year-old, has as many teeth as the average 8-year-old and reads on the level of an average 10-year-old.  You don't do a little calculation and move her birthday and say that she's "really" 6.5 years old.  She's just a tall, skinny, toothy, brainy 4-YEAR-OLD. 

 

soapbox.gif

 

Anyway, LOL...

 

Yeah, this would make me uncomfortable with the midwife.  Especially if I get that she has a fairly rigid viewpoint and isn't just using shorthand for this.  I am lucky in that I am 99% aligned with my MWs (so far), but I know there is at least one comment that one made where I was like... eh.  I disagree.  But it was a lot more minor and philosophical than this.  A couple of times she has pointed out a correlation between u/s, pitocin, epidurals, vax, etc. and the "rise" in autism, ADD, etc.  Well, she is definitely not stating causation (I'd have a REAL problem with that), but I just dislike that whole train of thought, even though I do think all of the above are cause for concern, and I don't plan on using any of them, with the exception of MAYBE one u/s and some vax. 

 

But the comment your MW made would make me more uncomfortable-- I might try to explore it a little more and see how strongly she feels.  If she is adamant and would change your EDD based on kick strength, I'd be very uncomfortable, as rigidity bothers me-- but especially rigidity based on personal belief/"observation" that (AFAIK) has little to no basis in reality.  Hrm.

post #4 of 15
I didn't really feel anything until about 20 ish weeks.
post #5 of 15

I feel the first strong kicks between 16 and 18 weeks. 

 

But today at 13+4 I felt definite little kicks! Makes me wonder how strong they'll be in another few weeks??

post #6 of 15

That's crazy. Every baby is different, every pregnancy is different, and it would totally be based on the location of your placenta, fat, etc. I felt my son kick hard around 14 weeks, and Im 15 weeks pregnant with two babies and ive only felt little flutters and only when I lay on my belly.

post #7 of 15
Thread Starter 

Well, I'm fairly sure I can't go based on LMP because I got a yeast infection and it seemed like it delayed ovulation (not charting, but observing fertility symptoms), I didn't have pregnancy symptoms until *much* later than AF would have been due, then tested on like CD60 and got a faint line (previous pregnancies had faint HPT lines at 6 weeks) . My current MW helped me decide on this date (adding almost 2 weeks to LMP based edd), I feel like even that might be up to a week ahead of me. But not 3! But it's not like anybody will talk induction or anything, just would like to know around when to expect this kid. Seems close to right to me since on my current mw's suggested timeline my nausea disappeared at 12w, BH contractions started at 13w like they always do for me, and I felt distinct little wiggles at 14.5w. I need a new midwife because I'm moving, and with this one the phone conversation with her just didn't connect well, but I'm terrible at talking on the phone anyway. That strong kicks always being a certain week thing threw me for a loop though. My only other choice is a birth center instead of home so I hope I do like with this one when I get to know her more.

post #8 of 15

This is my first pregnancy, but I was feeling flutters at 13 weeks and had strong, definite kicks by week 16 that began to actually hurt by week 18. My placenta is posterior, too, which helps with feeling kicks aimed out front.

post #9 of 15

My midwife, who is also very experienced, insisted I was not feeling baby move sometime between 12 and 14 weeks. It's my third pregnancy, I absolutely know the difference between gas and baby flutters. We agreed to disagree. But she was very adamant in her opinion that its impossible to feel the baby that soon. I heard her tell a new client the same thing the other day when I was sitting in the waiting area and just rolled my eyes (to myself). My midwife has been doing this for almost 4 decades. Perhaps her opinion is just so strongly cemented in time that it can never be changed ROTFLMAO.gif. This alone wouldn't necessarily sway me from a provider but if you don't feel like you are clicking with her don't be afraid to change midwives. My second pregnancy I changed midwives in week 34 or so and it was a great decision for me.

post #10 of 15

This is my first pregnancy and I was woken up in the middle of the night at 14 wks with strong kicks.  My midwife said said that I felt early kicks because I am thin and my placenta is posterior (baby is closer to the surface for me to feel his kicks).  I really, really think it mostly depends on whether your placenta is posterior or anterior.  I keep having people telling me that it's impossible to feel kicks that early because they didn't feel them until they were 6 months.  I think they were anterior and that just prevented them from feeling much for awhile.

 

Regarding the due dates, I got my midwife to change my due date to a later date at my appointment the other day.  They went from giving me a due date of Dec 17 to Dec 1 and the hospital's policy is to induce at 41 weeks (ridiculous).  I got her to change my due date to Dec 7, which I think is the most accurate date for me and gives me more time before they talk about inducing.

post #11 of 15

My doctor has talked about strong kicks as a way to tell how far along you are too, but I was charting and I think she respects that as more accurate.  I've read that too (the kicks thing), in at least one pregnancy book.  If you're really unsure about your dates I think it would be a useful thing to factor into your figuring.  

 

Kaliki - wow, inducing at 41 weeks?!  I would run far far away from a hospital with that sort of policy.  41 weeks is supposed to be the AVERAGE for first-time white mothers with no complications, according to one study I've seen, so half of all those pregnancies would naturally go past that.  

post #12 of 15
Quote:
Originally Posted by Brambleberry View Post

My doctor has talked about strong kicks as a way to tell how far along you are too, but I was charting and I think she respects that as more accurate.  I've read that too (the kicks thing), in at least one pregnancy book.  If you're really unsure about your dates I think it would be a useful thing to factor into your figuring.  

 

Kaliki - wow, inducing at 41 weeks?!  I would run far far away from a hospital with that sort of policy.  41 weeks is supposed to be the AVERAGE for first-time white mothers with no complications, according to one study I've seen, so half of all those pregnancies would naturally go past that.  

 

I told the midwife that I absolutely will not allow them to induce me like that.  She said it's nothing they can force on me and when I get to that point, just to stand my ground.  I think it's insane, too.  I was expecting her to say that they induce at 42 weeks and was shocked when she said 41.  I have Kaiser insurance and so can only use their hospitals.  (I say midwife because this Kaiser has you see midwives all during your pregnancy and delivery unless you are high-risk).

post #13 of 15
Quote:
Originally Posted by JamieCatheryn View Post

She said the first strong kicks are always at about 16 weeks, at least with non first time pregnancies

 

That statement, in itself, would indicate that there is an element of a mother's perception/awareness and that these dates are not hard-fast rules.  Not to mention all the other reasons presented, such as placenta location, etc.  Midwives are not infallible and may be prone to as much error and bias as any other professional. While not always the case, usually the longer a professional has been in a field, the more ingrained certain stances become.  I would not consider it a deal breaker unless you have other concerns.

post #14 of 15

I agree that it depends on the placenta, DD was anterior and I didn't feel much until 20+ weeks.  This little guy is posterior and I felt kick at 14 w and he was kicking a book off my tummy at 18 weeks, lol.  I feel waaaay more movement than with DD.  My MW says she has one client who felt movement at 11 weeks....

post #15 of 15
I am 17 weeks with my second and I don't feel kicks ( like the big ones you get with a further- along baby) but movement and wiggles became really apparent this week, my 12 week ultrasound dated me 2 days ahead of what I thought my LMP was, I wasnt charting and had to guesstimate

At 9 weeks, after DTD, me and my dp, if we pushed down just above my public bone felt "bump, bump, wiggle" too
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