Do I have to go through with this ...

[EmbraceLife]

Do I have to go through with sending my boys to preschool?

They're nearly two years old.

They are delayed and both have their own unique "issues".  There's times I feel preschool will be good for them, there's times I feel I'm being pushed into by our culture/doctors/therapists, etc.

I don't want to push my babies to grow up too quick.  I want to homeschool.

They are scheduled to start school in three weeks!

:(

[newmamalizzy]

My first thought, is "No!" 

But - are there logistical reasons why you're sending them as well?  Are you planning to work, or do you really need the extra downtime?  In my area there are a few different "playschools" with a similar vibe to pre-school, but the parents stay.  Is there something like that near you that might provide the benefits you're looking for without some of the cons of being away from your little boys?

Also, I tend to think that nearly 2 is pretty early for a real pre-school in the first place.  Is it truly a pre-school program?  Or more like an "education-focused" childcare? 

[Asiago]

Preschool was created in the 1960's for underprivilaged children, in order for them to begin kindergarten on a 'level playing field', thus the name 'Headstart'. It became trendy in the 1970's to apply this logic to the masses, then in the 80's the private preschool era exploded. Since people were sending their children to preschool, though they were not in the government funded program, private preschool became a big business. Then fastforward 20 years studies were showing that children who were not underprivilaged, actually were at risk attending preschool (social skills, intelligence, emotional health, etc,).

http://www.parentingscience.com/preschool-stress.html

Children of middle and upper class parents, and most of all those with a stay at home mother, were most at risk. The risks vary according to study. The Stanford/Berkeley report is one of the biggest studies on the effect of preschool. It's very interesting.

http://cepa.stanford.edu/sites/default/files/How%20Much%20Too%20Much.pdf

If you are looking for more info, search the the case against universal preschool or similar. 

I first became aware of the risks of preschool when I read the book The Science of Parenting by Margot Sunderland (Director Centre for Child Mental Health in London). SInce then I have researched and I feel that everyone should research this important choice of preschool before making a decision.

FWIW, preschool is 1 year, 2 max, before a child is scheduled to begin elementary school.

Edited by Asiago - 8/16/12 at 6:12pm

[kanani]

I think if you want to home school, you should go for it!

My DD is still very young, but I intend to home school her at least through the primary years. I come to MDC to read/lurk on the home schooling forums fairly often, just because I don't know many people in real life who do it. It would be so easy for me to "default" to a mainstream approach to DD's education, especially since all of my other mom friends are getting excited about sending their kids to nursery school/pre-school. Reading about what other mom's are choosing to do (and why) helps me feel more secure about my intention to home school. So did putting down on paper my own reasons for wanting to home school, something I felt I could draw upon if ever I feel pressured to enroll DD in school.

[Mom2M]

Originally Posted by Asiago 

Preschool was created in the 1960's for underprivilaged children, in order for them to begin kindergarten on a 'level playing field', thus the name 'Headstart'. It became trendy in the 1970's to apply this logic to the masses, then in the 80's the private preschool era exploded. Since people were sending their children to preschool, though they were not in the government funded program, private preschool became a big business. Then fastforward 20 years studies were showing that children who were not underprivilaged, actually were at risk attending preschool (social skills, intelligence, emotional health, etc,).

http://www.parentingscience.com/preschool-stress.html

Children of middle and upper class parents, and most of all those with a stay at home mother, were most at risk. The risks vary according to study. The Stanford/Berkeley report is one of the biggest studies on the effect of preschool. It's very interesting.

http://cepa.stanford.edu/sites/default/files/How%20Much%20Too%20Much.pdf

If you are looking for more info, search the the case against universal preschool or similar. 

I first became aware of the risks of preschool when I read the book The Science of Parenting by Margot Sunderland (Director Centre for Child Mental Health in London). SInce then I have researched and I feel that everyone should research this important choice of preschool before making a decision.

FWIW, preschool is 1 year, 2 max, before a child is scheduled to begin elementary school.

I read through this article and did not come to the same conclusion that you have.
What I get from it is that the best time to start preschool is between the ages of two and three with cognitive benefits seen in all groups.
Earlier than 2 years of age is associated with detrimental effects on behavior and no significant cognitive gains.

For high income families, attending preschool for between 15-30 hours per week show cognitive gains in pre reading and math skills with no significant effects on behavioral problems.
More than 30 hours per week is associated with behavioral problems.

Quote from the article

"Our findings
also suggest that greater benefits can accrue from
interventions that start earlier than age four.
Generally, children learn more when they start
center care between two and three years of age.
In addition, while half day programs may be
beneficial for children from higher-income families,
full day programs better serve children from
lower-income families, allowing them to gain prereading
and math skills without detriment to social
behavior. "

[Mom2M]

In my personal experience, my 7 year old DD attended a church preschool for 2 years that included crafts and some letter and number stuff but she loved it and had fun the whole time as far as I could tell.
She made a friend there who is still one of her best friends even though they now attend different schools.
Her hours were 2 days a week for 4 hours/day when she was 3 and then 3 days a week for 4 hours a day when she was 4.

I have seen no behavioral issues at all and she is far ahead in reading even at 7 but I know that may have nothing to do with preschool.

I plan on starting my almost 3 year old DD this fall for the same times/days.

[dejagerw]

They're nearly two? Meaning they're one? Anything calling itself preschool for one or even two year olds IMO is really just daycare. Daycare should be saved for parents who need to work not sahms. The best place for your baby is with you. Go with your gut.

[Snapdragon]

you don't have to go through with it, it is your choice not societues/doctors/pressure. I am still at home and spend almost every minute with my 2 and a 1/2 yr old and while I would love more help- I am not ready to send him out to school just yet! I considered it but couldn't find a good 1/2 day near by program so I Am gonna wait till at least 3 and a 1/2 when he can go into a couple mornings a wk pre school. DOn't do what you don't want to do.

[~Adorkable~]

can i ask exactly how old your boys are, twins?

i have twins that will be 20m next week and we are all going to a "Transitional 2's" program this year.  it is a special program aimed at folks that turn 2 after the sept 1st preschool cut off but before the end of the year. the parent goes with them for the 2 half day a week program from now till January when they phase the parents out over 2 weeks.  it then happens to be a co-op where each parent works in the classroom at least once a month, but not all are like that.

here are some of the reasons i decided to do any sort of schooling this fall and why i picked this type of program. maybe my thinking will help you sort out what works for you.

• my twins are still non verbal, no words at all. I think in part because their closest friend is not either they have little motivation to pick it up and since they are home with me and i know what they want so quickly, also little motivation to stretch and learn. being around other kids that are all going to be a month or two ahead of them (they happen to be the youngest) and other adults i think will be wonderful at showing them lots of folks communicating in different ways and give them the chance to get out of the rut they seem to be in.
• but because in part of this speech delay, i felt they were not ready for a stand alone program and really like that i get to be there, learn more about early education and experience different kids, my exposure to small kids is limited and i se it is a very different light than i did when i was childless and around my friends kids.

• i wanted something school like in general for two reasons, i have been home with the two of them every day of the last 20 months and frankly do not think i give them enough variety. i dont have a lot of friends where we live so play dates are few and far between. i think i would be a better mom with some loose structure  a few days a week. i will get to learn new things too and see how they like or dislike various toys and activities, what art supplies work best and basically learn from folks that have been doing this way longer than me. i'll get to see what best to get for our home play areas.

• i also will eventually need some down time. i need to go to the dentist, i want to cash that massage certificate i have had since they were born. i simply want rehang the door to their closet! all things that i usually cant do cause i am the primary caregiver.  i will be a better mom for having 4 hours a week to do self care and downtime. no matter how you want to, there are something i cant do with 2 toddlers in tow.

• the fact that we have a transitional 2's program lets me ease them into a school environment in a slow loving way that kids at older ages dont get the benefit of, while they may need it less. i have talked to a number of schools that take 2-3 year olds and they all say that they can spot the kids that did the T2's right away, they all say they are more secure and excited, showing the "newbies" even ones a bit older than them around. i want that kind of sense of self for my kids.

• the program we are going to happens to be a Reggio Emilia approach and i like that, though at under 2 I'm not totally sure how much that matters, it probably does a bit. i wasn't just looking for a day care center, i am their caregiver, but i do like a relaxed play based learning approach, so i think of this as preparing for school in the most basic way, it makes sense to me.

before i started looking into schools i didn't even know that transitional 2's programs were out there, and maybe they are a regional thing, but it might be worth looking into if it appeals more to you

[MamaBookworm]

First off, they are adorable! And 1 does seem a little young. So, no, unless you are working or something and have to put them in for that, I think you should trust your instinct, too. 

I put my daughter in daycare at 10 months so I could work. It was heartbreaking for me and I really felt like I had failed by not being able to figure out a way to stay home with her. Now she's going on 3 and really loves it. To the point where I had recently started working from home so that she wouldn't have to go, and then we decided she should still go at least a couple of days a week because of the benefits to her.  She genuinely enjoys her classmates and teachers, thrives in the routine, and wakes up eager to go most days. We plan to homeschool her, and I know that seems weird to send your little one to daycare when you ultimately plan to homeschool, but I actually think it's a lot easier to find good early childhood care than a good elementary school. So, even if you decide to send them to a preschool/daycare now, it doesn't mean you can't homeschool at some later point.

Good luck!

[marsupial-mom]

If it's a program where you trust the teachers and your kiddos feel comfortable, then yes absolutely I would do it if I were you. Delayed children need all the help they can get. 2-3 full days a week or 5 half days a week could greatly improve their outcomes!

[Asiago]

Originally Posted by Mom2M 

I read through this article and did not come to the same conclusion that you have.
 

Yes, the cognitive gains are common according to some articles/studies and from what I have read they usually disappear by first grade. I did read one study though in which they were retained for more years. Perhaps that is not so a much an issue of preschooling but something lacking in public schooling. Tucker-Drob is a Prof. from University Texas and has done a lot of work studying preschool and cognitive gains. In a nutshell, the disadvantaged children are the ones with cognitive gains according to Tucker Drob, not the others.

Tucker Drob http://www.futurity.org/society-culture/preschool-bridges-gaps-in-test-scores-later/

That's not at all discounting it, but to generalize it all of those who attend preschool is misleading and that is a common theme I have noticed in some articles, this fact is commonly distorted.

The cognitive gains though tend to come at a cost, and this seems to be a common conclusion in studies, at the expense of decline in emotional health and intelliegence (EQ). Although these losses only pertain to children who attended preschool at less than five years of age (per Margot Sunderland).

Quotes from first link listed below:

Using data from the Early Childhood Longitudinal Survey (ECLS), researchers concluded that preschool has a positive impact on reading and mathematics scores in the short term and a negative effect on behavior. While the positive academic impacts mostly fade away by the spring of the 1st grade, the negative effects persist into the later grades. (Katherine A. Magnuson, Christopher J. Ruhm, Jane Waldfogel, "Does Prekindergarten Improve School Preparation and Performance?" National Bureau of Economic Research, April 2004).............

A 2007 study funded by the National Institute of Child Health and Human Development tracked 1,364 children who had participated in early childhood education. Preschool participants were more likely to score higher on factors of aggression and disobedience as reported by their teachers.

 I feel strongly that those considering preschool should thoroughly research the benefits/risks, gains/losses, particularly the long term behavioral effects. I find the general assumption that preschool is beneficial to the masses (not by you, just generally stating) is not accurate, and that a particular group of at-risk children are more likely to see gains than losses (search the Perry Study). Another concern to me is the earlier and earlier institutionalization of young children. Preschool is intended for four year olds and older but now three year olds, and even two year olds are being enrolled. It just seems that preschool has become so common, no longer limited to those who are at risk, the decision to enroll in preschool is no longer questioned.

More interesting reading:

http://www.eagleforum.org/educate/2008/nov08/all-day-kindergarten.html

The following link (due to author) may be an interest to OP:

http://www.washingtontimes.com/news/2005/jun/12/20050612-103145-2475r/

Quote:

By the end of the primary grades, there was little difference in the academic performance of children who had experienced three different preschool models. http://ecrp.uiuc.edu/v4n1/marcon.html

There are of course so many important choices to make as a parent, and it seems this may be one of them that needs quite a bit of research before deciding. That's my opinion though, others may not agree.

[forestmushroom]

it really depends on the preschool. my children absolutely benefited from montessori preschool beginning between 2.5 and 3 years.