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Need some words of comfort.....

post #1 of 12
Thread Starter 

Hello Mamas! We are trying to conceive number 4.  We tried for a 2 months late last winter, but the timing was not great and I was dealing with some Lyme disease complications, so when it didn't work out I really wasn't too bummed or surprised.....but we were trying again this month, and the timing looked pretty good, and all my physical signs looked pretty good....and I just got my period this morning.  I know one month of trying is nothing - and I am extremely blessed to already have 3 amazing children.....But our first 2 were conceived on the first try, and our 3rd was conceived without even trying and I am feeling so down this morning....I am 2 weeks away from 39 and I am feeling like it is not gonna happen for us.  I am a negative person who kind of always jumps to the worst conclusion unfortunately, and my husband is a super super SUPER positive person and is being all positive about it today - telling me not to worry and not to be upset, that it will happen etc etc...and maybe he is right - maybe it will...but maybe it won't....regardless, I am super sad this morning.....I don't know whether we should try again next month ( we did have 2 times we had planned to dtd but our oldest landed in the ER one of the nights and everyone was awake in our vacation place the other and it just didnt seem appropriate lol), or if I should call the Dr and talk about fertility treatments? Would that even talk to me this soon?? Sigh....I just want to  cry today and was hoping for some comfort from some mamas.....thanks,

post #2 of 12
Thread Starter 

I realize I may sounds awful since we have only tried for one month....but like I said my frame of reference based on my other 3 is probably not normal.....and I am just so sad this morning and even though I have a ton of friends in their early 40s and late 30s who are pregnant or just had babies, I am feeling about 100 today....:/

post #3 of 12

I'm sorry you're feeling so sad.  You have been very, very fortunate in the past.  It sounds like you have no reason to believe it won't happen.  It just might take longer this time.  Some perseverance might help.  If one of your children gave up on something after only trying it once, wouldn't you encourage them to stick with it and try again?  Your husband sounds like a good influence.  We have tried 8 times and had one loss.  Each time, my wife tells me it will happen.  It's hard but I have to believe her.  I need to have faith that it will happen.  Good luck!

post #4 of 12
Thread Starter 

Thank you - and I know we have been incredibly lucky...it just has skewed my perception I guess....We will definitely keep trying and I will send you some good baby vibes as well....:)

post #5 of 12

Thank you!  I know it's easy to get down, but we all have to find a way to keep going because we know how great the reward is.dust.gif

post #6 of 12
Thread Starter 

Thanks again -- feeling better about it this week - here is some baby dust for us!! dust.gif

post #7 of 12

I thought it might help to chime and say that in my mid 20's (young) we charted to TTC and timed things right, and it still took 5 tries.


...and just know that it's okay to feel sad and to cry even if you're brain feels like it's irrational.  You're heart still feels it.  Let it out and you'll feel better soon and be ready to give it another go.  


I know that anytime I've ever thought I might be pregnant, and then found out I'm not.....I end up being horribly sad for several days after finding out.  The strong feelings always surprise me.

post #8 of 12
My first two took no trying at all (one was an oops and one was a pill baby). I am struggling HUGE with TTC this one. PPAF came back several months ago and I've charting and popping vitamins... I am still BFing though and am not yet willing to force her to wean even at night.

It's rough. I feel you, mama. <3 It's frustrating yet I feel whiny when I think of others I know who have been TTC forever and/or have experienced an mc or more. I believe it's all relative though and someone else's experience doesn't make someone else's experience not as big. You know?
post #9 of 12
Wow, you have a VERY lucky track record! I don't think your experience is typical, but wow that's awesome!

It took us 3 years to conceive our first, with a miscarriage along the way. We were both healthy, mid-20s, no real explanation except that's just how long it took. Our second, we weren't trying at all and she was conceived before we were ready! So, obviously we were fertile. Sometimes it takes a while. I'd give it at least 6 months before you assume something is "wrong." GL!
post #10 of 12

i'm sure you will conceive again... I'm in my early 20's and am having infertility issues, but I know one day I'll conceive again :) good luck!

post #11 of 12

I could have wrote your post, I kinda did in the TWW thread. My first was an oops and my second only took one try. I thought for sure it would be the same this time. Nope we are on try 6 and just got a BFN today. I'm sorry you're feeling so crummy, I know how you feel. hug2.gif

post #12 of 12
Thread Starter 

Thanks everyone....we are now in the 2ww phase....and I am beyond frustrated....my dh fell asleep twice while putting the kids to bed, and once told me it was too late at night (it was after 1 when all 3 kids were finally asleep)....i know he wants another one...i just dont think he gets how important the timing is....sigh.....thanks again everyone - you mamas are so awesome!!!

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