My water broke maybe 5 minutes before DD2 was born and was thick with meconium. DD2 didn't cry right away and needed to have some meconium suctioned. We came to the hospital and ever since we arrived she has had breathing difficulties. Her O2 levels drop frequently and her chest has retractions. She had a chest X-ray that showed a spot of something in one lung and her cbc came back with elevated white blood cells so she is now being treated with antibiotics intravenously. She also has a lot of discharge in one eye, so I authorized erythromeyacin (sp).
Because of her breathing issues, they don't want her to eat much bc they are afraid she could vomit and aspirant the vomit. So I can't really nurse her. And I can't really comfort her because that could compromise her breathing too. So here I sit. Totally effing useless. Listening to my daughter shriek became she desperately wants to be nursed and cuddled. Watching as she shoved her tiny fists in her mouth and roots for food when I am not allowed to nurse her.
I know that everyone is trying to do the right thing for my child, and she's in the best NICU in my state, but this is seriously the worst experience of my life.