We're having a few issues with our four year old daughter. Lately, she has just been plain RUDE and it's driving me up a wall. There have been numerous situations at home and at school where she's just willfully rude to the people around her. And what's worse is that she doesn't seem to care.
For example, today I was picking her up from preschool. I come into the room and she's busy washing her hands. One of her classmates helpfully calls over to her, "[name], your Mommy is here!" My daughter looks over at me and continues washing her hands. When she doesn't respond to me or her friend, her classmate repeated helpfully, "[name], your Mommy is here!" At which point, my daughter turns around and says to her in a rude tone, "Can you stop saying that? I know that already." Her poor classmate looked crushed! I told my daughter that wasn't very nice and said to her classmate, "Thank you for helping tell her. That was very nice of you."
When I tried to get my daughter to say sorry, she shrugged and tried to divert my attention to something else. I talked to her about it as we walked back to the car. I explained that her friend was just trying to be helpful but DD was having none of it. "Well, I was washing my hands and drying my hands. I knew you were there." I asked her if there was a nicer way she could have said it. She said yes but reiterated that she was washing her hands and that she knew I was there. So I asked her if she would have felt bad if her classmate had been rude to her in the same situation. She said yes. I asked if she would still want to be friends with someone who was rude to her and she said no. Then when I asked if she would feel bad if her classmate didn't want to be friends with her because she was rude, she simply shrugged.
This is pretty typical of how she's been acting lately. She's been rude and while she hates it if other people are rude to her, she doesn't seem to care if she's rude to others. She has also been acting like this lately to our roommate whom she has been rude to lately. In response, our roomie is not interacting with her as much in hopes that our daughter will understand that if you're rude, people won't like you. The problem is that she seems to understand the not liking you part -- the problem is that she doesn't change her rudeness!
It's driving me up a wall because I have no idea where she's modeling this from. :( Our family is NOT rude to other people and we don't tolerate rudeness. But even though we talk about it and the reprecussions of being rude, it keeps happening. Any advice would be appreciated :(