Originally Posted by Baby_Cakes
AFM - I've achieved zombie status. I need to get some consecutive sleep SOON. Idk what to do. It's going on 3 weeks now with maybe an hour stretch at a time. I know it's normal and I'm not worried about much other than just .... my safety and health.
And DH pisses me off b/c he isn't as tired and doesn't understand why I just fall asleep at night. He acts like it's the end of the free world lately b/c we haven't been having sexy time. I'm just too freaking tired. It doesn't even cross my mind -- I literally fall asleep with one of the kids. Or I come out and say good night and then go to bed w/o even thinking. I wish though that even once he would just acknowledge how tired I am and give me a break or a pass. Instead, he just acts like a huge baby. Says he feels we don't spend time togehter. Says our relationship isn't the same. Loads all this GUILT onto me, that it's somehow MY responsibility to have enough energy to take care of these kids AND him.
I don't get it. And I'm too tired to really argue with him about it so I tell him to get over it.
Ok - I wanted to also bring this up b/c I want thoughts. Sometimes I'm just to freaking tired and I want to snack. Chris gets so mad when I bring home chips/cookies, etc. He gets upset and tells me this is why I can't "lose weight" and this is why "we're chubby". These comments...they are starting to upset me. I feel like he's basically calling me fat. Now, I don't feel like a supermodel, but I think i look ok, and when he says these things I just kind of want to be like WTF? I'm exhausted and have 2 kids and I try to find as much time as I can to work out when i have the energy. So shut up. You know? Sometimes I just freaking want some oreos or some chips. And I feel like he is being rude. thoughts?? WWYD or say?
^^^Yeah that. It's like... knowing that the sleep stage is normal, and nothing to be worried about, is one thing. But somehow managing to get yourself enough sleep through it-- not as easy!
And yeah, we don't dtd NEARLY enough, but by the time I've determined that she's actually asleep "for the night" (the first part of the night she wakes up every 35 minutes or so now, and then settles into eveyr hour)... well by that time I just desperately want my few minutes of sleep I'm going to get! If I had to guess, I'd say right now I'm averaging 6 hours of sleep a night, broken up into segments, so I'm not sleeping longer than 45 minutes at a time. When we take the time to dtd, I get more like 4 hours. I miss that sleep! lol But, guys don't understand.
Classic case-- I'm up with Ten every hour, all night long, and then I'm at her beck and call all day long as well, right? And then he gets home, and I spend the evening cleaning, doing dinner, and then putting her to bed. I don't "work" but I freaking work! lol Anyways, so again tonight, DH went to get her out of her crib, because I was beyond frustrated, so I put her down to take a break, and he didn't like that. So, he picked her up, but then was complaining, because she wouldn't settle, and he says something along the lines of "if you don't go to sleep now, daddy's not going to be able to go into work until like 10". Like yes, being up with her ONCE at 930pm-- before you're even fallen asleep for the night, gives you adequate reason to justify going into work 4 hours late (or calling in sick, which he did the other day!).
It's frustrating. He can claim that he wakes up just as often as I do during the night, but really, not even close. He may stir when she cries, but he (and guys in general) don't have to 'get up' the same way we do. At the end of the night, he still got 8 hours of sleep, with only momentary interruptions. I think it comes from this misconception that at home = sits on your butt all day relaxing and rejuvenating and napping any time you like.
Oh, and yes!! That is very rude of him! You are definitely not chubby, and from what I think we've all seen, you're pretty active, and eat pretty healthy! People are allowed small indulgences and treats every now and then! Could he be feeling self conscious about his own body and health habits, and maybe taking it out on you?