I can see the point in that. And its not like a baby should be the "prize" for infertility. But at the same time, there is *something* that kind of bothers me (well *bothers* is too strong of a word i think) if someone who is married, fertile, etc wants to adopt a newborn domestically when there are so many people who do that because they have fewer options. But then again, i suppose *I* could go buy sperm and birth children instead of adopt them. My adopted children (although from the foster care system) would not have gone without a family. So i guess the same "argument" could apply to me. I dunno.
But i do think sometimes people have really skewed ideas about adoption...either they think that there "are no babies to adopt" and if you do adopt you have to wait ten years and pay $50K.....OR they may think there are all these babies who are just waiting for a family (people esp think this about black babies...i've read so.many.times on the internet or have seen on tv "no one wants to adopt black children" which is simply not true) when the reality is somewhere on that spectrum. And infants of any race or even severe medical needs do not often go without a family, indeed there is often stiff "competition" for those children regardless of issues(i guess this might depend on geographic location).
But that being said....IMO more options for a birthmom choosing a family is better than less options. So i guess im just sort of conflicted both ways. Obviously each person has to make their own decisions, but i do think there's an interesting discussion/debate in there somewhere.
I agree with all of this. It truly irritates me to hear people say nobody is willing to adopt African American babies. I worked mainly in special needs foster adoptions, and no joke, I had a four year old African American boy with an autism spectrum disorder on my caseload and I literally had over fifty home studies submitted for him. Similar situation with a four year old African America girl who had disrupted out of THREE adoptive placements due to severe behavioral issues and RAD. With babies, it could have easily been double or triple the number of home studies. Except in extremely rare cases, the "need" for homes for newborns just does not exist and it really amounts to a competition between families. I'm passing no judgment on that. It's good for kids to have a wide pool of potential matches and good for birth mothers. What does rub me the wrong way though is people pretending like "adopting a newborn needing a family" is some sort of impressive humanitarian effort.