9/9 Weekly Chat Thread - Page 2 « Back to Group Discussions

[kel]

I've never picked at a berry farm, so to me all blackberry picking is wild blackberry picking.  They grow all over the place, mostly road and trailside, here in the Pacific NW - so we've picked around Portland and Olympia and out toward the coast this summer.  I remember picking them as a kid in upstate NY, too, when I visited my grandma there.  I couple weeks ago in, back home in Whitefish, it was huckleberry picking - which are probably my new favorite berry since moving to Montana six years ago.  They aren't the tiny tart red huckleberries like in WA, they're big, dark purple, and sweet - but it takes a lot longer to pick them than blackberries, that's for sure!  

I finally just got a new bra - my "old" bra (bought a few months ago when I was already up a cup size from pre-pregnancy) was leaving marks on my boobs by the end of each day.  I ended up buying a cotton nursing bra at Target (the polka dot one if you've been in there lately;) and had to get it in the 2XL!  I think they run a bit small, since I'm up to about a 38DD now, and the main reason I got a nursing bra is because it was one of the few bras in the place that wasn't ultra padded - which I hate.  Anyway, it's not underwire, so it's not super flattering, but it is super comfortable and no marks left when I take it off.  I have honestly never had my chest grow this big during a pregnancy before - and this is my fifth.  All I can think is that I may have started off about 10-15 lbs heavier.  As far as the engorgement period - I usually just wear a super soft cotton sleep bra. 

[travelmumma]

Hi Mummas,

bras?!? Yeah, i seem to be going through another chest expansion stage right now too... DH said this morning that my nipples need to get so big so that a little baby can use them as a target for breastfeeding lol!

And I have started leaking too... Didnt know that this could happen so early with number one? I took of my bra last night and I had leaked during the day! Starting to think of wearing breast pads? And I had just washed the bra damn it lol

Not much going on here.. I seem to be going through another crazy arse emotional period. I cried yesterday because i couldnt get the fire started, and then i cried because DH could. Then i cried because dinner didnt taste the way I wanted it too..

Now am wondering if I should just take the day off and cry around the house, or if i should go and see my other Natural Parenting mummas and cubs...

Sorry, such a urgh post :(

[cieloazul]

Tangental to the bra discussion, can we talk underpants? I'm finding most of mine really uncomfortable these days. Do you have a favorite style or brand that works for you in this last trimester? I saw some maternity panties at a store the other day and they were like US$8 a pair, which is more than I want to spend considering that I'd like more than one pair, lol. And I hate the feeling of low-rise ones under my belly, drives me nuts, so I don't think I can get away with that fix either. Right now I'm doing lots of laundry or just going wild and free but, um, late pregnancy gets a little juicy for that if you know what I mean.

[stegenrae]

The cotton motherhood maternity ones are my go to. Idk how expensive they are, but I just get a 5 pack (or I did, way back when). I may need to get another here soon, too.

[lulubikes]

I got some undies at Old Navy a few months back. I got the bikini ones - they aren't maternity at all and got a few sizes big and wear below my belly. I just got one 3 pack so I still have to wear my old undies, which are getting uncomfortable. I can't remember the price, but I think it was not too bad - $10 for 3 pack or something.

[kateadelle]

Hi Mamas!

On the subject of underwear: The best thing I have purchased for myself this entire pregnancy has been some maternity underwear from here: http://belevation.com/. They are definitely not cheap, but they are supportive and long enough to keep my thighs from rubbing together when I wear dresses (which I do a lot). They don't bunch up or roll down or give me wedgies. They are really, really comfortable. I only bought 4 pairs since they are pricey, and end up washing them frequently, but I love them so much that it is worth it. 

I just got back from a 5 day visit with my family. I love them so much, but they seriously drive me nuts and my hormones are really not helping increase my patience. It was also so HOT where they live (100 plus degrees F) - I have a new compassion for all of you mamas you love in climates not quite as mild as where I live. I grew up there, but I have definitely acclimated to the Bay area! My mom did take me out shopping and bought me a breast pump and ergo, which was really great. Unfortunately, she brought my 4-year-old niece and 7-year-old nephew along and then encouraged them to pick out some presents for the baby. It was very sweet to see them picking out stuff, but despite my insistence that the baby likes lots of colors, they picked out a lot of frilly pink heart-covered stuff - not really our style. My partner, in particular, is pretty horrified. I have the receipt, but I feel terrible returning stuff that the kids picked out, especially since the clothes are all pretty tiny and are just going to be puked all over anyway (pretty fitting, since they kind of make us feel nauseated!), but it is tempting especially because we need a lot of other stuff more than we need clothes for the baby since I have been doing a lot of thrifting for baby clothes.

My sciatica is still rearing it's ugly head, but I definitely feel better after having seen my chiropractor. He gave me a lot of good tips for stretches and exercises I can do to help relieve the pain. I have also been resorting to Tylenol now and then when the pain gets really bad. On a positive note, I haven't had any more leg cramps at night since starting the cal/mag supplements. 

Hope you are all enjoying your Septembers so far. It is so crazy that we are all entering our third trimesters. Time is flying by!

[kel]

I've never bought maternity specific underwear. I just wear loose cotton underwear or full coverage boy shorts. Yes, my thighs do smack together a bit this time around, in dresses and knee highs, but aside from the sound;) I don't mind. I personally couldn't stand underwear that went over my belly.  I think they're cute, but it would drive me nuts! 

[travelmumma]

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

 I know that I just posted this in that "hilariously glamorous pregnancy stories" thread, but i HAD to share on here to make sure I gave you all a laugh!!!!

LOL!!!

This was really really funny!!!!

So. I work as a life model for drawing classes.. I absolutely love it, esp with the bump :))))

This morning I was modelling for a group of high school students, and it was their first time having a life model in the room. It was a bit funny, lots of the boys were embarraed! Lol so cute!

Anyway we did a few warm up poses/drawings then started on a 10 minute pose... Half way through my nipples felt cold all of a sudden... I tried to sneakily peak at them whithout moving!

LOL i looked down and guess what?!?!?! I was SQUIRTING milk!!! While i was frantically thinking "oh crap what do i do?!?!" one of the boys nudged another and whispers really loud "WOW look at that!!"

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA I cracked up laughing! The teacher nearly wet herself!!!

LOVE IT!!!

[nhklh]

Gotta love a good milk-squirting story!

Re undies, I just have the same cheap target multipack bikini ones as always.  I can't stand anything on my stomach in early pg, and was worried because I thought these would irritate my c/s scar but they are ok.  And cheap, so I don't care if they're bled on later.

Stressing myself out a bit today.  Dropped the kids at a friend's place late this morning and realised on the way home (40min drive each way) that I couldn't remember feeling baby move today.  Tried not to worry about it, figured I'd call my MW if still nothing in a couple of hours.  Had a couple of hours at home with DP.  Luckily orgasm seems to make movement happen lol.  

I'm also wondering if baby is transverse.  MW said breech when I saw her last Thursday, and that night I had a poke around and could feel the head.  I can't feel that now though, and there seems to be more baby side to side rather than up and down.  Still doing daily inversions, and wondering if I should be doing more than that ASAP.  MW said on Thursday that there was plenty of room in there still (from feeling, she knows about my uterus).  It's weighing on my mind, and I'll try to feel again tonight.  Almost all of the movement I feel is down very low, and has been all along.

I've been painting my kitchen/dining area this week.  We've been here a bit over 7 years and the original paint is of such poor quality that some of it comes off every time I wash fingerprints off the walls.  Plus it's all grimy looking (no matter how much I clean it!) and chipped and so on.  I've done probably 1/2 of the area of the walls so far, but it's an L-shaped room with a section for the fridge, so there's actually 9 walls, sort of.  I haven't done any painting today, but did clean the walls behind the fridge, and masking-tape the area.  I'm going to need to get a friend to come paint the section above the pantry cupboards because while I'm game to stand on a chair or to stand on the benchtops, I'm not keen on ladders!

I'm finding my body feels very sore and very tired very easily.

[sunseeker]

Travelmumma - I just LOVE your story, and especially love that teenagers are getting to see a (your) beautiful pregnant body, and seeing breasts in functioning mode as opposed to model/object mode, which is the way most teenage boys think of them. You are awesome!

[segolilymama]

travelmumma - love the story :) It did make me a bit sad, though - I was thinking there is NO WAY any HS kids would be working with a nude life model in the US... which is a damn shame... I have a lot of opinions about how we both sexualize & shame women/bodies in this country at the same time... sigh....

Bras: I have 3 bravado nursing bras from when I had DS2. They are my go-to maternity bras. They are 11 years old, though, and all pretty much need to be replaced soon. I get to about a 38FF when engorged, though (I'm a DD normally), so I figure I will make these last as long as possible and hopefully have some $ to pick up a couple new ones about a month after baby comes.

Underwear: each other pregnancy I wore those big granny-panty maternity ones, I couldn't STAND to have anything touching my belly anywhere except above the fundal line. Oddly, the underwewar I usually wear - Victoria's Secret lacie thongs - have been incredibly comfortable this time around, like I don't even know that they are there, so I haven't gotten anything else. Not gonna be very practical for postpartum pads and such though, lol!

kate - sorry about the pink crap ;) One of the benefist of not knowing gender is people don't buy what to me is offensive baby clothing - super frilly, or 'Daddy's little MAN' kind of stuff. I prefer the yellow, green, white neutral stuff. But (see line one above) I have a lot of feminist views about gender & specifically trying to 'genderfy' children, without allowing them to grow into their own gender roles & sexual orientations. That and if you read any of the psych studies on babies & gender, you can take the same baby, dress it two different ways, and people will respond to it differently - boy babies are 'big & strong!', girl babies are 'sweet and cute.' I wouldn't feel bad returning things - you can always just say 'oh she grew out of it so fast!'

[kateadelle]

Originally Posted by segolilymama 

kate - sorry about the pink crap ;) One of the benefist of not knowing gender is people don't buy what to me is offensive baby clothing - super frilly, or 'Daddy's little MAN' kind of stuff. I prefer the yellow, green, white neutral stuff. But (see line one above) I have a lot of feminist views about gender & specifically trying to 'genderfy' children, without allowing them to grow into their own gender roles & sexual orientations. That and if you read any of the psych studies on babies & gender, you can take the same baby, dress it two different ways, and people will respond to it differently - boy babies are 'big & strong!', girl babies are 'sweet and cute.' I wouldn't feel bad returning things - you can always just say 'oh she grew out of it so fast!'

Yes! I kind of wish we had not told them about the baby's sex. It really raises every feminist hair on the back of my neck to have people telling my daughter who she is going to be before she even gets here. Obviously, I don't have an issue with the color pink (I am wearing it right now, in fact), but I hate all the crap that goes along with it - the flowers and hearts and princesses and "mommy's sweetie". Maybe she will be into that stuff, maybe she won't, but I want HER to decide that. I am especially sensitive to all the gender stuff because my previous LTR was with a trans-person. Gender is something I have spent a lot of time thinking about. It has been one of the most shocking things to me about pregnancy - just how invested people (perfect strangers!) in my unborn baby's sex and "appropriate" gender role and how pervasive it is in our culture to assign a baby with a rigid gender role right from the start. I kind of always knew that was happening, but it has never been so in my face. It makes me really sad.

[lulubikes]

Kate - I agree about the pink frilly stuff. It is actually one of the reasons I haven't found out the baby's sex. But it really just delays things since once the baby is born people will genderify it!

Sego, I totally agree with your ideas on letting children develop their own gender/sexual orientations. I've always felt very strongly about this, but it has been an interesting growth aspect for me during this pregnancy. Even though I thought I had pretty much gotten rid of my cultural/gender biases around clothing. I find myself saying - I can't put a boy in that - it's too feminine or vice versa! Then I get made at myself and challenge myself. I mean I'm fine with my son or daughter choosing whatever clothing no matter how feminine or masculine, but I'm finding that I feel uncomfortable with the thought of putting a boy baby in pink for example... it's very interesting, frustrating, etc!

Also, thanks on the bravado bra recommendation. I just purchased 3 online. A bit of a impulse, but I'm hoping that they will be more comfortable for now and later. The bra I purchased on Monday has been very uncomfortable - but my breasts have just been uncomfortable in general - I've been chalking it up to wrong bra size, but now I supposedly have the right size, they still hurt :(... 

[segolilymama]

kate - my last relationship was with a trans-person as well. Even though i THOUGHT I was very open minded & conscious of gender issues, s/he REALLY opened my eyes to how many biases & stereo-types I had that I had NO CLUE were even there. I am much more sensitive to those issues now!

lulu - I feel the same about some of the clothes - "I can't put a boy in that - it's too feminine or vice versa!" For me it comes down to the same kind of logic - I don't want to label my boy as feminine any more than I want to label him as masculine, and same for a girl. Of course no one here should expect to see nothing but neutral clothes on my kid, either... On another related note, DS2 wore pink glitter snow boots for a whole year that he picked out; he is about as 'masculine' as you can get these days in many ways - loves BMX, soccer, skateboards, power tools, and driving bobcats & bulldozers. He also has a VERY sensitive heart & soul. My point? The clothes mean absolutely nothing... AND I hate participating in that particular cultural conversation, labeling through garments.

Hope the bras work out for you - I love mine, I will be sad when they finally give up the ghost lol.

[cieloazul]

Originally Posted by sunseeker 

Travelmumma - I just LOVE your story, and especially love that teenagers are getting to see a (your) beautiful pregnant body, and seeing breasts in functioning mode as opposed to model/object mode, which is the way most teenage boys think of them. You are awesome!

^^^ Yeah, what sunseeker said :)

Originally Posted by kateadelle

It really raises every feminist hair on the back of my neck to have people telling my daughter who she is going to be before she even gets here. Obviously, I don't have an issue with the color pink (I am wearing it right now, in fact), but I hate all the crap that goes along with it - the flowers and hearts and princesses and "mommy's sweetie". Maybe she will be into that stuff, maybe she won't, but I want HER to decide that.

Yes, yes, YES! It's so bizarre. I'm finding it much more complex to navigate this gender landscape with a girl than I did when I was expecting a boy. It's been an opportunity to re-examine a lot of my own internalized rejection of the sacred feminine, and to reflect on my experiences with the patriarchy and disempowerment. It's so not just a pink onesie in that context. And yet, like you said, it's a perfectly fine color. Babies can't hardly even see anything when they're first born so the color alone is certainly not going to damage her, it's all the crap that's attached to it now. I remember reading somewhere that pink and blue were once upon a time about balancing a child's energy from a color therapy perspective. So the idea was a girl could benfit from being around pink because -- already posessing a soothing, cool, peaceful feminine energy (i.e. feelings evoked by the color blue) -- the red/pink color would balance her by providing a warmer, fiercer, more masculine energy. And vice versa for little boys; the idea being everyone needs both. I may be completely mixing that folklore up and creating a new internet myth but it made sense to me and really gave me pause.

Also on this topic of gender representations, have you all seen the movie MissRepresentation? I think that would be a great documentary for anyone parenting a daughter to watch.

[kel]

I was browsing at a baby clothes resale shop a few days ago and found some snap bottom tees - brand new, really sweet, for cheap.  One was white with pink polka dots and the other white with little pink elephants.  We don't know if we're having a boy or a girl.  I asked my almost 12-yr-old son if they were too feminine for a possible boy, and he asked, honestly perplexed - Why would they be?  How is pink "girlie"?  Those probably weren't his exact words, but his general response made me really happy that I have a 12-yr-old boy that feels that way. 

[purposefuldoula]

Originally Posted by darkblue0729 
Natalie-I am sending you something this coming week, I promise!!!!! I came across something neat that I wanted to send your way!!!

Kelly- your stuff will be on the way tomorrow! I just have now, what I call the ''kelly bag'' where I've been throwing everything in to send you before I get to the post office to get a box. I'm just going to grab a few so I have them around the house. 

Jen- My Addy had hiccups ALL THE TIME and was 15 days post due. So, in our case, that tale does not hold true! I'm also itching to start on baby's quilt, but seem to have so many other things that need to be done first. Are you planning on doing a quilt pattern? 

Anne- your cabin does sound magical!! It sounds like the perfect weekend home :) 

Rae- I don't eat nearly enough protein either. I just don't generally enjoy it! I've started boiling a ton of eggs every week just to keep on hand but I'm sure I need more. I feel like the second trimester has completely left me and now it's time to be tired all the time again! But there's still so much to do!! 

Sunseeker- sad about your FIL. (((hugs!!)) Also, did you do the KC renfest? That started a few weeks ago and I've been thinking about taking the family this year. This will be our third fall in KS and I have yet to go! 

Lulu & kel- oh bras. They are such a necessity but man, I hate having to buy so many different sizes during and after pregnancy. I see that you already splurged on some bravados, but here is a link to the (cheap!) nursing bras I get from walmart. I've used them now through my last two pregnancies and love how comfortable they are. I NEED full coverage and these do just the trick.  I bought one last week and am buying two more tomorrow, (pay day!) so I can quit wearing my pre-pregnancy bras. Those are all minimizers, which aren't too good for me anyway, but I just can't stand saggy boobs.  I should probably get over that, since I'll most likely be into a G or H by the time we are nursing again. 

Sandi- your art class story is just too much! I love it! The only time I've taken a life drawing class, we had a model who was 8 months pregnant. It was so beautiful!! Kudos for you for modeling!! I think that's wonderful! 

Kate- I agree on the frilly stuff. We have NO idea who these babies will grow up to be, so to try to give them a gender identity drives me nuts! I also agree with you on visiting family! I love my family, but I don't know if it's hormones or what, but when we visited last month, they drove me insane! Part of it was my dad who had a cow that I was knitting pants for this babe because to him, knit pants aren't "manly."  Oh, lordy, when did decided who our kids are going to be become so acceptable? 

Kel- what your son said is amazing! I hope I am raising my littles to be that unbiased and freethinking when they are 12! 

AFM, I think we are finally getting used to DH being gone so much with school again. It's his fourth week of classes and the girls and I are finally not going nuts by the end of the day. Today I'm planning on finishing up the dining room as our homeschool room and we will put a real *start* to our homeschool year. I've also started thinking about bigger stuff that needs to be done before baby comes- like how am I going to do bedtime with three by myself? And how am I going to situate all three car seats in the car. I'm also making a mental note of random things I'd like at this birth and getting way too excited for it. Like white christmas lights! I plan on stringing them up all over the house in a few months.

I finally went to the chiro on Monday- sweet relief!! Last night I could roll over without vocalizing my pain. My chiro is a birth center and homebirth dad, so that is pretty neat. I'm just kicking myself for waiting to go for so long!  

I also got a little teary today talking with DH that our baby could be here in less than three months. HOLY MOLY! That is sooooo soon! Some of you ladies will have babies in two months. How crazy is that to think about? 

Remember a few months ago we had talked about doing some kind of Skype shower with everyone? Can anyone remind me of what that was going to entail/be? 

[lulubikes]

Originally Posted by purposefuldoula 

I also got a little teary today talking with DH that our baby could be here in less than three months. HOLY MOLY! That is sooooo soon! Some of you ladies will have babies in two months. How crazy is that to think about? 

When I read this, I was like that isn't right, I'm at the beginning of this DDC and I have 3 months! Then I looked at the calendar.... OMG! I've been focusing so much on going late, telling myself I have 3 more months, that I forgot that there is the possibility of going early, which would be 2 months...

On that note, I've been thinking that 12-12-12 would be a super amazing birth date. I've been telling the baby that. But it's really up to him/her... and that would mean going almost 2 wks late for me :), I might change my tune around 39 weeks! I'm sure someone in this group will have a baby on 12-12-12 though.

I am super focused on my last day of work before my leave - 27 working days left (I work 3 days a week). Wowza!

Thanks for the tip on the super cheap nursing bras at Walmart. I hate shopping at Walmart, but if the Bravados don't work (or I return them) or I need more, I might check them out.

I must have missed the skype baby shower idea, that would be super fun! It might be hard with people in so many time zones...

Oh and Alaskanne - thanks for the tip on Encore Registry! I had been looking at all sorts of alternative registries - had decided on Alternative Registry, but they're not taking new members right now. Then I had settled for Recycled Registry or My Registry, but Encore is even better! Perfect for me.

[DeeGee 1873]

Hi Mamas!

Joining in late this week, because we have had a busy couple of days. We finished switching around the kids bedrooms this weekend, so early this week I was catching up on all of the housework that I skipped this weekend. Plus, there are the extras that you have in store when moving furniture (like dusting baseboards that have been hidden behind furniture and lots of extra vacuuming). But, oddly, I have had plenty of energy for it, and have even tried to do a few fun extras. My darling daughter has been begging to make a lemon meringue pie every since we read Amelia Bedelia for the first time, so when we got two lovely lemons in our share at co-op yesterday, I felt inspired. And making a custard type pie is a great lesson in patience for a four year old. Letting the pie crust cool, getting the custard thick enough, making perfect meringue, and then when all is said in done . . . refrigerating it for 3 hours before you can try it! Well, all of the effort was well worth it because the pie was absolutely delicious, and DD was so proud of the result, that now we are just trying to decide what kind of pie to make next.

I am also planning on doing lots of baking this weekend while the husband entertains the kids at a birthday party on Saturday afternoon. We have some bananas that I am going to let get really ripe for banana bread or banana muffins, because that sounds awesome to me today for some reason. And now that all of the delicious pumpkin ales are for sale in our local stores, I have a wonderful recipe for a really rich, moist pumpkin bread that uses pumpkin beer in the recipe. Mmmmm . . .

Joining in the undergarment conversation . . . as for bras, I have some left from previous pregnancies. And the advice I got while pregnant regarding nursing bras was to wait til my milk came in to be fitted for those. And I read somewhere recently that Nordstrom's will take ANY bra and convert it to a nursing bra. I don't know any of the details, but it will be something I look into a little more closely as I near my due date because I really HATE my old nursing bras. Seriously, for those of us that are really blessed in the cleavage category (I was a G before I ever thought about getting pregnant with my first, and even being 20 lbs. lighter at the start of this pregnancy didn't make my chest any smaller), nursing bras are all huge, underwire monstrosities. And none of them fit me well because to get the right cup size the band size always begins around, oh, 38, but I actually wear a much smaller band size so I have to have my bras altered anyway. And as for underwear, Old Navy has maternity underwear that I am really comfortable in. I love the suggestion of the ones someone mentioned upthread . . . the longer ones to avoid the thighs rubbing together? Because that is a fun problem this pregnancy!

[nhklh]

Mmmmm lemon meringue pie!  My favourite recipe isn't really pregnancy-friendly as the only cooking the yolks in the lemon part get is the 10 mins in the oven to brown the meringue. 

Bras - I'm still wearing the old maternity bras from 4-5 years ago.  They've pretty much had it and they are too small already.  How I wish those shelf-bra maternity singlets worked for me.

Ended up having a bit of a cry (again) to DP today.  I'm scared.  Scared I can't birth, scared of transferring to hospital, terrified of another section, and most of all scared of failing.