He is having a *very* difficult time transitioning to school. The school is the best one I could find, I've heard nothing but good reviews, etc. It's a small class of 3 and 4 year olds...15 kids, two teachers and one parent helper (it's a co-op) each day. It's totally play based and the only thing they want children to learn is that "school is a fun and safe place.". Okay great. I will say I'm not terribly impressed but I'm very picky.
There are two huge issues going on. First is that he's having a horrible time separating from me. He was okay he first day for almost two hours, second day 20 minutes, third day 5 minutes and so on all followed by massive meltdowns. I've hung out at school and come in and stayed in the room with him when he's gotten so upset. Teachers have asked me not to "helicopter parent" and to let them settle him. That didn't work. They eventually came to get me. So that is problem A. He keeps saying he likes school but misses me and wants me to stay. He's having numerous meltdowns throughout the day if for instance I'm not standing in line with him holding hands. Teachers are majorly discouraging that. Regardless I'm 10 feet away from him but it isn't "close enough."
Problem B is I'm seeing how different he is from other kids. This is no surprise. I worked in a preschool during college. I guess I just expected the differences to be less stark. I'm not sure what I'm seeing... Sensory? Attention? Auditory processing? ASD? He seems so totally zoned out. He is normally very talkative. Here when anyone says anything, he seems totally oblivious. He's having a hard time "conforming.". Circle time, line up to go outside, everyone go wash hands.... He's just totally in his own world. He's like this a bit at home, but not nearly to this extent. It's like he's totally paralyzed by being overwhelmed. Completely unengaged. He can get busy doing something for a bit but doesn't like to be pulled from free play.
I don't know what to do. Besides cry. Which is all I want to do. So I'm posting in special needs because I know a lot of you have been through this and I'm hoping y'all will have some wisdom to share with me. I don't know if I should just keep coming every day, pull him out, homeschool? I feel like if we don't do this he's not going to be ready to start school next year. He can't be that sobbing kindergartener. I feel like if we don't make this work I'm going to be stuck homeschooling til he's 18 and I am not ready to sign up for that. I hate seeing him struggle so much though and am not totally thrilled with school.