WHich preschool....in home or private school?

[rainsmom]

I have checked out two completely different preschools for my dd and need help deciding which one to send her to. SHe is 3, will be 3 1/2 by the fall. Both schools 2 days a week, 9-1.

#1- Private school that goes from preschool - grade 5. I was really impressed with this school. There are 21 kids in the preschool and 3 teachers. Its a great highly recommended school in town. They also teach French, music and sign language as part of the preschool curriculum and thru the higher grades as well. Teachers were well qualified and we are considering sending her their for the duration of elementary school, if we can afford it. (!) The kindergarten has only 12 dc's. they also have a separate pre-k. Preschool is reasonably priced. THey had a large room with different sections for diffent activities....the activites revolve around the alphabet, seasons, weather etc etc
#2 - Playgroup in a womans home. Not really a "preschool" but they have essentially the same schedule and activities. She had rabbits, baby chicks and chickens and ducks, a garden for the kids, yoga, music (she plays guitar and has a piano), art, crafts, a wonderful yard to play in.....really a unique situation. She only takes 7 kids. She also does activities that revolve around the seasons/weather etc. ITs loosely waldorf, but not strictly. She has homeschooled her 3 dds who are in their teens now. One teen is home and helps her out when she needs it. They also bake one of the days.


I see pros and cons to both. I love the smaller setting and lean toward that, but also see the advantage of having qualified teachers etc etc. WOuld love to hear from those who have gone thru this decision, teachers.....anyone who has some ideas for us.

thanks!

[Evan&Anna's_Mom]

It probably depends on why you are doing preschool and what you hope to get out of it. If its just a chance for your chid to play with other kids and get used to being away from you, that's one thing. If you are hoping that it will help your child prepare for school, then its probably a different decision. For me, preschool (as opposed to daycare, because I work PT and had to do one or the other) is to help prepare DS for a rigorous school program next year. Therefore, the introduction of school "structure" (e.g. raising one's hand, lining up), academic subjects/learning readiness, that sort of thing was important. So we chose a school that provided that. Had I just been interested in socialization, I would have made a different choice.

Which probably helps you none at all, but maybe provides some of the questions to ask yourself so you make a decision you are comfortable with.

[rainsmom]

Thanks for your input......no one else has responded

[springbabes]

When my younger DD was 3 I put her in an informal in-home preschool and she LOVED it. I don't even know if she learned anything but it was a really good experience for her. She's always been very shy and clingy so it was fantastic that she took to preschool.

This year her teacher decided not to teach at the last minute so I found a highly-reviewed private preschool with a trained staff, etc. etc.--I got the last spot availiable. Long story short, she hated it. I think it was just a personality thing--it was very structured and she constantly worried about inadvertently breaking a rule. It didn't help that the teachers were constantly praising her for following the rules so well and being so good, etc : . It became very stressful for her--she tried so hard to keep up the image--so we quit going. Of course, now I'm a little worried about how kindergarten will be for her :--I'm just hoping she gets a very sweet teacher that isn't so rule-oreinted .

So, if it were me, I would probably go for the in-home preschool, esp. since your DD is still rather young--I'm guessing she still has two years before kindergarten? I figure kids have a lot of years to be in school so why hurry, ykwim? The in-home one sounds less structured and tons more fun. Personally I think it's a better fit for a 3-y-o.

I would save the private preschool for when she is 4 and closer to kindergarten. But, like E&A's Mom said--a lot of it's going to depend on your DD's personality and what you want her to get out of it.

[mammastar]

I was going to say that the in-home option sounded pretty neat, and then I looked at the school's website - I can see why you have a dilemma, because it sounds fabulous! And the tuition is quite reasonable, at least compared to what I've seen.

If you're interested in an initial away-from-home experience and playmates, the in-home one looks good - and you may be able to enroll next year or the year after at the more formal school (saving 1000s of dollars in the process!).

What great choices you have!

[rainsmom]

I know, at least I have 2 good choices to choose from.
My dd is VERY social naturally. I agree, with the idea that she will have plenty of years in a regular school, why rush it. My sis, who has been emailing me back and forth, is a former preschool teacher, and anyone who doesnt have early childhood degree is not worth the money in her book. She also doesnt think much of homeschooling. The woman at the inhome school homeschooled her 3 girls. I think that says alot. Plus, I think you have to go buy your gut feeling, and I have a good feeling about her. The other school is fantastic.....but lots more kids etc. I think they are both the same as far as the amount of structure. But she can always go there for their pre-k next year if I decide to do that. Yes, she has 2 years before she starts Kindergarten....bc of her december bday, she will be almost 6 when she starts.

We are going tomorrow to the inhome school to be there while the kids are there so I can see how the woman interacts with the kids, and how my dd interacts.

One thing interesting my MIL told me (shes a teacher too), she said structure is good, but too much isnt. One thing to look at is the art work on the walls. If it all looks the same, you know the teacher is too structured and too involved with telling the kids HOW to do things. I thought that was an interesting way to analyse it.

thank you so much mamas for your interesting and insightful replies!! It really helps to hear from those who have recently gone thru this.

SPRINGBABES: do you think your dd didnt like the structure at the 2nd school bc she was in the inhome school first? DO you think her reaction would have been different if you had put her in the more structured school from the begining? How did you resolve it in the end?

[rainsmom]

I hope I get some input from you guys after I post this.......


We went to the inhome playgroup today. She had told me on the phone that the kids would be outside playing in the back and to just let ourselves in the driveway gate. We let ourselves in and walked to the back. There wasnt any adult to be seen. The kids were playing and running around. I saw the woman thru the glass door, helping a girl who had a broken arm put her sweater on. She was also trying to call one of the parents bc a dc had come down with a fever. The girl with the fever was lying down inside with her 13yr old dd. She finally came out.......had the kids get eggs and let the chickens out.......and her visiting mother came out to tell her that the parent had called but she didnt pick up the phone, but let the machine get it. so eventually she starts to head toward the back door to return the parents call. The girl w/the broken arm was visibly not doing well (she had broken it somewhere else the day before) and was sitting on a bench swing. While she went to get the cordless phone, one of the kids tripped and fell while running and bumped her head. She came running out and picked her up and got something cold for her head.

It was obviously not her shining moment, but dh and I came away feeling like hmmmmmmm, maybe this isnt a typical day for her, but its what COULD happen. I dont feel as good about it as I did. And my sis who was a preschool teacher says adamently that one adult is not enough for 7 kids and this scenario proves that point.

Please post your input ladies......I need your feedback on this, though my gut is telling me maybe this isnt the place.

[lauren]

The question that pops into my mind is, how did she handle it? Was she stressed out and not thinking straight, or smooth and unruffled? Some people could handle 7 kids without a hitch (I am not one of them) and others are in over their head. It does sound like a bit of an unusual day, but she also knew there were visitors and this was what she showed you (?) NOrmally there are probably not at the same time a kid with a broken arm, kid with a fever, and then someone tripping. But in light of that, I would also be wondering......

[rainsmom]

She seemed to handle it well, not frazzled at all......just maybe sorry that we were there to observe. She kept apologizing for it being a bad day.

I honestly dont know what to do.

[mammastar]

She sounds like a nice person, and it's entirely possible she was having a bad day...but I'd be cautious. I agree that the downside of an in-home situation is one tired, burnt-out caregiver with too few hands and an inability to be in seven places at once. It sounds to me like she has a lovely concept that may not always pan out in reality. The downside of informality is a slide into chaos. Children can find a modicum of structure easier to be around (at least mine does - the loose-knit playgroups where everyone runs around screaming always leave her in tears!).

Given that you're keen on perhaps having your daughter in the other school for elementary as well, I think that I would go for having her there, maybe just for a few mornings a week to start. Their website was very impressive, and then you'd also have continuity if you want it.

[rainsmom]

Yes, dh and I talked about it last night. That was probably her worst day of the year......yet the unsupervision that went on was not something I can live with. I would be thinking about it each time I dropped dd off.

So we are going with the private preschool. I think its a great choice for us. ANd I heard from a friend that they dont turn anyone down who applies for a scholarship. You get SOME assistance.....so Im happy with that. ANd by that time I will be either ready to return to work or have a home business going.

[lauren]

Sounds like a good decision, one you are at peace with!

[rainsmom]

Yes.......Another instance where you need to listen to intuition. I know we as parents will make many mistakes......THeres just SO many decisions we make for the welfare of our kids. SOme decisions are hard, some are made easy by shear coinsidence or circumstance.

Thanks to everyone for posting!

[Ilaria]

The school looks great! Sounds like you made a good choice!

Maybe I coul drive my ds up there every day- a bit of a commute!

[rainsmom]

Thanks.......Yea, that would be a haul!


Now Im looking at Kindergartens......the one at the private school is excellent, only 12 kids a class......BUT there is a Waldorf Charter School here that is also wonderful....I went to their open house on saturday, and am having a hard time deciding between the two.

Guess Ill have to start another thread on that one!